
















YOUNG FOLKS’ 
ENCYCLOPAEDIA 
OF ETIQUETTE 





Photo by Joel Feder 


Finishing Touches 


These delightful menus, place cards, etc., were made from 
Dennison’s crepe paper and gum seals. Their special charm 
lies in the fact that the children themselves can make them. 







YOUNG FOLKS' 

ENCYCLOPAEDIA 
OF ETIQUETTE 

BY 

lWv NELLA BRADDY 3U >• 

v • ' u <3 



GARDEN CITY, N. Y., AND TORONTO 

DOUBLEDAY, PAGE & COMPANY 


t 






COPYRIGHT, 1921, BY 
DOUBLEDAY, PAGE & COMPANY 

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, INCLUDING THAT OF TRANSLATION 
INTO FOREIGN LANGUAGES, INCLUDING THE SCANDINAVIAN 

APR 25 1921 



©CLA611798 


PENITENTLY 

TO 

MY MOTHER 






AUTHOR’S NOTE 


'T'HE other day I ran across this sentence: 

“Etiquette permits mean conduct, vulgarity, 
dissoluteness, and punishes only one crime, the 
crime of being found out. ,> That is not the kind 
of etiquette with which this little book is concerned. 
It is an attempt to strip the word of the petty and 
over-nice formalities commonly associated with it 
and to present only the essential basis of all 
pleasant social intercourse — good manners. 

Even while the book was in manuscript, long 
before it was translated into “galley” proofs, the 
question rose as to how the children should be 
taught to conform to these rules of polite behavior. 
A colossal task it would be to explain that! The 
story comes to mind of the old colored man who 
upon being asked how he had managed to bring up 
so large and well-behaved a family answered, 
“Boss, I raised ’em with a barrel stave and I 
raised ’em frequent. ” I hold no brief for the barrel 
stave, nor for the Biblical rod, the hair brush, the 
peach tree twig, nor the vicious little plant which 
grew in my grandmother’s back yard and so far as 
I know never grew anywhere else — “tea-weed” 


Vlll 


Author's Note 


they called it. Yet there must be discipline — 
discipline, precept, and example, these three, and 
the greatest of these is example. The crab mother 
in the fable with all her anguished pleading could 
never teach her children to walk forward instead 
of backward because she could not show them how 
to do it. 


CONTENTS 


CHAPTER I 

The Infant Years 

The Threshold. Announcing the Baby’s Birth. Responding 
to the Announcement. Preparations for the Christening. 

The Christening. After the Ceremony. Public Appearances. 

CHAPTER II 

Table Manners 12 

Table Manners as an Asset. Be Clean. Be Courteous. Be 
Careful. 

CHAPTER III 

Culture 23 

Environment. Conversation. Books. Toys. Music. 

CHAPTER IV 

“Personal” 32 

Cleanness. Dress. Modesty. Odds and Ends. 

CHAPTER V 

Home and Family 38 

Brothers and Sisters. Older People. Servants. Pets. 

ix 


X 


Contents 


CHAPTER VI 

PACK 

When Company Comes 46 

Company. The Visitor’s Rights. The Child’s Rights. Big 
Sister’s Callers. Refreshments. At the Front Door. Over 
the Telephone. 

CHAPTER VII 

Other People’s Children £2 

Selecting Playmates. The Undesirable Playmate. The Per- 
sistent Caller. The New Friend. Having Company. When 
Johnny Goes A- Visiting. 

CHAPTER VIII 

In Public 59 

Deportment on the Street. Salutations. Hats and Caps. 

On Street Cars, Etc. On the Train. Shopping. Chaperon- 
age. Theatres, Concerts, Etc. Motion Pictures. Church. 

CHAPTER IX 

School . . . 73 

The First Days. The New Pupil. The Teacher. In the 
Schoolroom. On the Playground. Boarding School. 

CHAPTER X 

Cards 79 

Visiting Cards. Other Cards. 

CHAPTER XI 

Introductions 81 

Presentations. Acknowledging an Introduction. 


Contents 


xi 


CHAPTER XII 


Correspondence 

Stationery. Post and Postal Cards. Correspondence Cards. 
Personal Letters. Business Letters. Invitations, i. In- 
formal Party Invitation Addressed to a Mother. 2. Informal 
Party Invitation Addressed to a Child. 3. Formal Invitation 
to a Dance. 4. Informal Invitation to a Dance. 5. Invita- 
tion to a Picnic. 6. Invitation for a Week-end. Envelopes. 
Spelling. 


CHAPTER XIII 


Funerals ... 

The House of Sorrow. The Funeral Service. Condolence. 
Mourning. 


CHAPTER XIV 

Riding and Driving 

Automobiling. Bicycling. Riding. 


CHAPTER XV 

Sports and Sportsmanship ‘ . . 

Games. Bathing. Boating. Hunting. Fishing. Hiking. 
Scouts. 


CHAPTER .XV.I 

Politeness and Patriotism 

Patriotism. The American’s Creed. The Parts of the Flag. 
The Colors .of the Flag. Raising the Flag. Saluting the 
Flag. Displaying the Flag. A Worn-out Flag. Special Days 
for Displaying the Flag. National Songs. 


PAGE 

84 


96 


TOO 


IO4 


1 1 4 


Xll 


Contents 


PAGE 

SUGGESTIONS FOR PARTIES AND OTHER 

ENTERTAINMENTS 123 

Parties in General. New Year. Valentine. Washington’s 
Birthday. St. Patrick’s Day. April First. Easter. May- 
time. Fourth of July. Hallowe’en. Birthdays. Sewing 
Parties. A Peanut Party. Mock Outdoor Track Meet. 

A Carnival of the Five Senses. A Surprise Party. A Pound 
Party. A Tackey Party. Candy Pulling. An Indian Party. 

A Clover Party. A Spider Web Party. A Bon Voyage 
Party. A Sweet Pea Party. A Bubbles Party. A Japanese 
Party. A Shadow Party. 

ONE HUNDRED INDOOR AND OUTDOOR 

GAMES - -- -- 159 

Animal Hunt. Alphabet. Androscoggin. The Bachelor’s 
Kitchen. Baste the Bear. Bean Bags. Beast Bird or Fish. 

Blind Man’s Biff. Blind Man’s Buff. Blind Man’s Wand. 
Book-Binder. Bull in the Ring. Buzz. Cat and Rat. 

Catch and Pull. Charlie Over the Water. Chickens for 
Sale. Circle Catch Ball. Club Fist. Co-Sheep. Counting 
out Rhymes. Dance of the Cushion. Dodge-Ball. Do 
This and Do That. Dramatic Adjectives. Drawing. Drop 
the Handkerchief. Duck on a Rock. The Farmer is Coming. 

Fire! Fire! Fly Feather. Follow the Leader. Forfeits. 

Fox. Fox and Geese. Fox and Hen. Frog in the Mill-Pond. 

Fruit Basket. The Game of Flowers. A Geography Game. 

Going Through the Brier Patch. Going to Jerusalem. Good 
Morning. Gossip. Guessing Game. Ha! Ha! Hail Over. 

Here I Bake, Here I Brew. Hide and Seek. Hop Over. 

Hot and Cold. Hot Cockles. Hunt the Whistle. It. Jack 
Frost. Jack in the Bush. Jacob and Rachael. Japanese 
Crab Race. A Jingli»ftMatch. Lame Fox. Leap-frog. Lost 
Cap. Master of the Ring. The Missing Ring. Musical 
Contest. Musical Neighbors. Noah’s Ark. Panjandrum. 

The Parish Priest. Passing the Club. Pi. Poison Circle. 

Pom Pom Pullawajr*. ‘Poor Pussy. Prisoner’s Base. Puss 


Contents 


xm 


in the Corner. Sail a Boat. Simon Says. Shakers. 
Shouting Proverbs. Sling the Monkey. Spoons. Spud. 
Statue. Still Pond. Tag. Target Flip. Ten Steps. Three 
Deep. Thimble Thimble. Tick Tack Too. Tom Tiddler’s 
Ground. Trade Pantomimes. Traveller’s A. B. C. Twirl 
the Platter. Up Jenks. Weather Cock. Who Are You? 
Wink. Yemari. 



































LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS 

Finishing Touches Frontispiece 

FACING PAGE 

“And the Star-Spangled Banner in Triumph 

Shall Wave” 114 

Ready for the Party 146 

A Party Dress That Will Gladden the Heart 
of any Little Girl 


147 



YOUNG FOLKS’ 
ENCYCLOPAEDIA 
OF ETIQUETTE 















CHAPTER I 


THE INFANT YEARS 

“If they [manners) are superficial so are the dew- 
drops which give such depths to the morning meadows 

THE THRESHOLD 

I T IS possible to gloss an adult over with a super- 
ficial social veneer which will answer all ordinary- 
purposes just as it is possible for a skilful cabinet 
maker to cover an inferior wood and fashion an article 
which will, except under a very severe test, pass as 
genuine. But if courtesy is to be the real thing, 
guaranteed not to crack, peel, or blister, it must be 
of the fibre of one's being. The qualities which make 
the oak all lie within the acorn; and a child’s training 
in politeness should begin at least with his grandfather 
and should be almost finished by the time the young- 
ster himself is six years old. 

Good manners in children presuppose good man- 
ners in those who have them in charge; and the child 
who falls heir to a fine spirit of courtesy is far richer 
than one whose only heritage is money, even though 
it be millions. Children do not snatch the torch of 
good behavior from some burning bush as they enter 
3 


4 Young Folks ' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


the wilderness. It is handed down to them just as it 
has been handed down since the earliest days of man- 
kind, and with the ungentle treatment it has had at 
certain points along the journey there is small won- 
der that now and then the flame burns rather faintly. 

The rising generation has always been wild, has 
always been hanging over the ragged edge of destruc- 
tion. Eve doubtless wondered what the world was 
coming to when she considered the conduct of her 
two sons, Cain and Abel. But however much par- 
ents deplore the manners of their children they must 
remember that they themselves are the strongest 
force that enters into the shaping of their character 
and deportment. 

ANNOUNCING THE BABY'S BIRTH 

T HE accepted way of announcing the arrival of a 
child is for the parents to send cards to their 
friends within a week or so after its birth. A reliable 
stationer can always furnish the latest mode, but a 
style which has been approved for years is a card 
somewhat larger than a woman’s visiting card bearing 
the name of the father and mother and, fastened to 
it by a tiny bow of white ribbon, a very much smaller 
card bearing the name of the infant or the word, 
“Son” or “Daughter” if the delicate question of 
what to call the baby has not been settled. 

Another style which has won favor is the sending 
of the joint card of the father and mother with the 


The Infant Years 


5 


name of the infant engraved across the top in small 
letters. 

Many people prefer the quaint and delightful cards 
specially designed for the occasion as being more inti- 
mate than those which are engraved. Others send 
no cards at all but write notes to their closest friends 
to apprise them of their good fortune. 

RESPONDING TO THE ANNOUNCEMENT 

T HE person who receives one of these announce- 
ments should respond at once by sending his 
card with “ Hearty congratulations” pencilled on it, 
by writing a cordial note expressing his joy at the 
happiness of the parents, or by dispatching a simple 
gift addressed to the child itself. 

PREPARATIONS FOR THE CHRISTENING 

TF, ABOUT six weeks after his arrival, the infant 
has laid fast hold upon the thread of life and his 
mother is ready to resume her social duties, plans 
are made for his christening. 

When the religious faith of the parents demands 
sponsors they should be chosen from among relatives 
or very close friends, for while it is commonly ac- 
cepted to mean only a pledge of friendship and good 
will, there are many people who look upon it as a 
sacred trust not lightly to be undertaken. The in- 
vitation should be given in person, or if that is im- 


6 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


possible, in a very warm note. Since men have a 
way of shifting all social responsibility to their wives 
the mother will probably have to ask the godfather 
as well as the godmother, and even if her husband 
has already made the request she should supplement 
it with a note somewhat like the following: 

Bear Mr. Scott , 

Jack and I will be very happy if you will consent | 
to be godfather for our son y John Hanson Windsor , 
Junior. My sister , Helen , is to be his godmother. We \ 
have arranged for the christening at four o'clock next 
Sunday afternoon in our drawing room and hope that i 
you can be present on the occasion. With kind regards j, 
in which my husband joins , I am y 

V ery cordially yours , 
Elizabeth M. Eaton. 

654. Madison Ave. 

June io y 19 — . 

A child may have three sponsors, two women and 
one man if it is a girl, two men and one woman if it 
is a boy; or if the mother prefers there may be only 
two, a godfather and a godmother. 

A sponsor should answer the invitation immedi- 
ately, and two or three days before the baptism 
should send the child a gift of some kind. A bit of 
silver bearing his name, simple jewelry, a gold piece, 
a savings bank account, a garment or a set of gar- 
ments, or any dainty little carriage or toilette acces- 


The Infant Years 


7 


sory are suitable. Flowers may be sent to the 
mother. 

The number of guests at a christening depends en- 
tirely upon the desire of the parents. There may be 
present only intimate friends or the affair may be 
made one of social prominence in which event the 
ceremony should be followed by a reception or dinner. 
The invitations may be informal notes or engraved 
cards, thus: 

Mr. and Mrs. John Lewis Towne 
request the pleasure of your company 
at the christening of their daughter 
on W ednesday , April tenth 
at five o'clock at 
St. Paul's Chapel 

THE CHRISTENING 

T HE christening takes place at the church or in 
the drawing room at a time which will not inter- 
fere with the baby's regular hours for eating and 
sleeping. 

The decorations should not be so stiff and formal 
as to suggest a wedding or a funeral though flowers 
may be used in great profusion. Easter lilies and 
palms used in conjunction with tall white candles 
lend dignity and solemnity to the scene, but apple 
blossoms, valley lilies, or carnations with delicate 
vines and ferns are equally effective. 


8 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


The baby’s robe may be an heirloom replete with 
family traditions or it may be a dress made especially 
for him, a little more elaborate but none the less 
comfortable than those he wears every day. He may 
be handled with much more ease and grace if he is 
brought in on a pillow or a porte-bebe which has a 
coverlet into which the tiny limbs may be slipped and 
fastened. This may be of exquisite lace and em- 
broidery, but lavishness in any of the appointments is 
in extremely poor taste. 

Ordinary street dress is appropriate for the mother 
if the ceremony takes place at church but if it is at 
home she may wear a reception gown. 

In entering the church the baby is carried up the 
aisle in the arms of the nurse who walks beside the 
mother, the sponsors following in the order of their 
seniority. The mother seats herself in the front pew 
while the elder godmother takes her place beside the 
nurse and walks with her until they stand in front 
of the clergyman. At the proper time she takes the 
child from the nurse and places it on the left arm of 
the clergyman, pronouncing his name distinctly 
as she does so. When she is not sure she can re- 
member it — and even mothers have been known to 
forget — she had better write it down on a slip 
of paper and have it where she can refer to it in 
the event that it becomes necessary. When the 
clergyman returns the child she may give it to the 
nurse or hold it herself during the rest of the cere- 
mony. In a simpler form of christening where there 


The Infant Years 


9 


are no sponsors the mother herself gives the child to 
the minister. 

Father and godfather are decorative rather than 
useful and should therefore try to look as amiable 
and handsome as possible. If healths are drunk the 
godfather proposes that of the child. 

It is said to be a sign of good health if a child cries 
at the baptismal font and with this the mother must 
console herself if the conduct of her offspring is not 
what she would like for it to be. On this one occa- 
sion it is the divine right of the young monarch to do 
exactly as he pleases. 

There is little difference in the order of procedure 
when the christening takes place at home. Father 
and mother receive their guests together, and when 
they are comfortably seated the rites begin. 

AFTER THE CEREMONY 

AFTER the ceremony is over and the infant has 
been sufficiently admired he should be sent 
safely away to the nursery while the older people 
either disperse to their homes if the christening has 
taken place at church and there are no festivities to 
come, or else gather for the reception or dinner or 
whatever else the parents may have in store for them. 
The clergyman should be invited and if food is eaten, 
whether or not it is customary to have a blessing in 
the home, he should be asked to pronounce one. If 
the company goes to the dining room he escorts the 


io Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


grandmother, or if she is not present, the mother. If 
both grandmothers are present preference is given 
the elder. 

The mother may exhibit to her friends the gifts 
which have been presented to the child but the cards 
of the donors should be removed before it is done. 

In addition to the soft music which is played dur- 
ing the ceremony there may be special numbers, but 
if the christening takes place in the drawing room 
these should not come until the small person in whose 
honor the company is assembled has been sent away. 
He is not likely to appreciate additional details even 
when they include the tenderest and most beautiful 
of lullabies or cradle songs. At a church service his 
presence throughout the affair is almost compulsory 
since there is no graceful and inconspicuous way in 
which he can make his exit. 

PUBLIC APPEARANCES 

A MOTHER has no right to carry an infant to 
places of amusement or instruction where he is 
sure to interfere with the enjoyment of other people. 
It sometimes means that she will have to deny herself 
theatres, lectures, and concerts, but motherhood is 
made up of such denials. 

When the baby is wheeled down the street he is 
likely to be beset by well-meaning grown-ups who 
poke their fingers into his face, jab him in the ribs, 
make mouths at him, chuck him under the chin, kiss 


The Infant Years 


ii 


him, and otherwise injure his dignity. The child was 
never born whose disposition could stand this sort 
of thing. If the mother is with him she must remon- 
strate politely but firmly, and the nurse should be 
instructed to say, “Mrs. So-and-So does not like for 
people to kiss the baby,” or “The baby has not been 
well lately and its mother does not want it to be 
excited,” or whatever else is necessary to ward off his 
effusive admirers. The mother will probably be 
thought a crank but at any rate the child will not 
grow up nervous and irritable from misguided at- 
tentions. 


CHAPTER II 


TABLE MANNERS 

“A child should always say what's true 
And speak when he is spoken to. 

And behave mannerly at table; 

At least as jar as he is able 

TABLE MANNERS AS AN ASSET 

T HE two subjects upon which everyone has to 
pass a rigid entrance examination before he 
is admitted to the inner circles of good breed- 
ing are his way of eating and his way of speaking. 
His language a child will catch without conscious 
effort on his part from the people among whom he 
lives but his manner of eating he must be taught 
with infinite care and patience for it is a thing which 
man has evolved through centuries of civilization, and 
the natural instinct of a child revolts against it. 

Whenever possible the punishment should fit the 
crime, and since the penalty which bad table manners 
brings is exclusion from the homes of well-bred people 
the child who does not observe the ordinary rules of 
dining-room etiquette should not be allowed to keep 
his place with the other members of the family at 
mealtime. 


12 


Table Manners 


1 3 


The chief mistake in teaching table manners is to 
confuse the youngster with a multiplicity of Do’s and 
Don’t’s when the whole thing might be reduced to 
three simple precepts, Be Clean, Be Courteous, and 
Be Careful. 


BE CLEAN 

TOURING the greater part of the day it is a child’s 
privilege to be as outrageously dirty as he needs 
to be in order thoroughly to enjoy the games he plays 
and the work he does but when he comes to the table, 
for the sake of those with whom he eats as well as for 
his own, his hair should be neatly brushed, his face 
and hands free from grime and dirt, and his finger- 
nails as near immaculate as soap and water and a 
stout nail brush and file can make them. 

As soon as he has graduated from a bib he should 
begin using a napkin, not clumsily knotted around his 
neck but laid across his lap once unfolded; and he 
should take pride in keeping it, his clothes, and the 
tablecloth unspotted. At the conclusion of a meal 
in a public dining room or in the house of a friend the 
napkin is not folded, but at home where it has to serve 
for two or three meals it should be folded square 
before it is placed at the side of the plate. 

Napkin rings should never be used at a formal 
dinner or anywhere else except in a home or a board- 
ing house where fresh serviettes are not supplied 
three times a day and common decency demands 


14 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


that each person use the same one for successive 
meals. It is better, however, to have some other 
means of identification, for the habit of rolling or 
folding a napkin to fit a napkin ring has an em- 
barrassing tendency to stick. 

The finger bowl is used at the conclusion of a meal 
or of a fruit course. It is half filled with water and 
set upon a plate on which a small doily is laid. It 
may contain a slice of lemon, a flower, or a few 
drops of orange water. The lips are lightly dabbed 
with the tips of the fingers and each hand in turn is 
dipped into the bowl, and dried with the napkin on 
the knees. The whole performance is conducted 
without splashing and without noise. 

Children are as prone to accidents as the sparks 
that fly upward; and there is no reason in scolding 
Johnny when he overturns a glass of tea or upsets a 
cup of cocoa or sends a piece of meat bounding across 
the room. He is probably as sorry as any one else 
and the mishap should be forgotten after he has 
apologized for it. If it occurs at the table of a friend 
and involves the breaking of a bit of china or glass 
an effort should be made to replace the broken arti- 
cle. When food falls on the tablecloth it should be 
allowed to remain, but if it falls against the clothing 
it may be removed with the point of the knife or 
the corner of the napkin. 

At the conclusion of a meal crumbs should not be 
scraped into neat little piles beside each plate nor 
should the dishes be stacked in the manner sacred 


Table Manners 


15 


to the traditions of cheap boarding houses. The time 
for cleaning up is not while the diners are still gath- 
ered around the board. 

BE COURTEOUS 

PUNCTUALITY is the first law of table courtesy. 
^ The family does not like to be kept waiting and 
the cook does not like for her carefully prepared dishes 
to get cold. 

Whether there shall be grace before meat depends 
entirely upon the will of the mistress of the household 
and not upon any rule which a book on etiquette may 
formulate. The custom had its beginning in the 
times when men hunted for their food and a good 
dinner was a thing not to be had every day and was 
therefore looked upon as a special dispensation when 
it came. To-day there are many people, who, 
feeling that asking a blessing before a meal and not 
before a sunset or a walk or a visit to friends or any 
one of a hundred or so other delightful things places 
undue weight upon something which is comparatively 
insignificant, have done away with it altogether. 
If it is pronounced it may be before the guests are 
seated or after they have taken their places, but how- 
ever it is done, all heads should be reverently bowed 
and absolute quiet should obtain. 

A child should not be seated until after those older 
than he are in place. He should be careful to sit 
far enough back from the table not to have to spread 


1 6 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


his elbows like wings when he uses his knife and fork 
and close enough not to have to lean forward and 
snap at his food. It is a pretty little attention for a 
lad to place his mother's chair, especially if his father 
is not present to do it. 

All conversation should be on pleasant subjects. 
A well-bred child will not comment disagreeably 
upon the food which is set before him, but if there is 
something particularly objectionable he will speak 
to his mother about it afterward. There cannot be 
too abundant use of such expressions as “Thank 
you," “May I?", and “Please." 

The appointments of the table and the dining room 
have a very real influence on the people who are 
gathered around to eat and be merry. A bowl of 
flowers or a vase of leaves, plates garnished with 
sprigs of parsley, sandwiches daintily cut, salads 
attractively served, clean napery, walls finished in 
soft colors, beautiful pictures to rest the eye — all of 
these add greatly to the pleasure of the diners not 
only in their enjoyment of the food but in their 
enjoyment of each other. 

The ideal manner of eating is with “indifference, 
calmness, and cleanly circumstance." It is unspeak- 
ably ill-bred to chew with the mouth open, to talk 
while there is food in it, to smack the lips to show 
satisfaction, or to blow upon food to cool it. A child 
may ask for a second helping but he should not be 
allowed to devote himself to his favorite dish to the 
exclusion of everything else on the table. Aside from 


Table Manners 


17 


the fact that it is not good for him it may be some- 
body else’s favorite dish. The rules of health as well 
as politeness forbid his bolting his food so as to get 
back out to play. 

Toying with the table furniture, clinking the 
glasses, resting the elbows on the table, or leaning 
back in the chair are not in keeping with the rules of 
refined manners in the dining room. 

When for some urgent reason a child has to leave 
the table before the end of a meal he should first catch 
the eye of the hostess, and saying, “ Excuse me” 
rise quietly and depart. At the conclusion of a meal 
everyone waits until the hostess has signified that it is 
time to rise. Chairs should not be pushed aside 
unless they are in the passage-way, and children 
should let their elders lead the way out. 

BE CAREFUL 

N O CHILD should ever be expected to sit through 
the torture of a formal dinner, but every child 
should be so thoroughly trained to the niceties of 
dining-room etiquette that when the time does come 
for him to take his place at banquet boards he can 
do so without embarrassment or fear. The conven- 
tional way of eating is practically the same every- 
where and any one who is well-grounded in its basic 
principles need not quail before the most formid- 
able array of servants and silver. Whenever he is in 
doubt as to what course to pursue the child should 


1 8 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


watch his hostess, not openly but surreptitiously, and 
take his cue from her. 

In any catalogue of things which every child should 
know, the correct way of preparing a table for a meal, 
especially if the child is a girl, would have to be 
placed near the top of the list. It is as important 
to place things properly as it is to use them properly 
after they are placed; and if the table is correctly 
laid there will not be many times when the small 
diner has to turn his questioning eyes in the direction 
of his hostess. 

Before it is set for a dinner a table should be cov- 
ered first with a silence cloth of asbestos or heavy 
flannel and then with a linen cloth of irreproachable 
whiteness. At a luncheon it may be left bare except 
for doilies and mats. The plates should be arranged 
symmetrically around the table about two inches from 
the edge and with an allowance of something more 
than two feet for each cover. The breakfast plate 
is slightly smaller than the regulation dinner plate 
but it is similarly placed. At the left of the plate are 
the forks — three at a formal dinner, one for fish, 
one for meat, and one for salad — the napkin, and 
at every meal except an elaborate dinner a bread 
and butter plate with the bread and butter spreader 
laid across it. At the right of the plate are the 
knives and spoons and the long-handled fork which 
is used for oysters. It is either placed at the extreme 
right or laid across the knives. Almost on a line with 
the bread and butter plate is the water glass. Knives, 


Table Manners 


19 


forks, and spoons are arranged so that they are used 
from the outside in, and if the meal is to begin with 
soup a large soup spoon is at the extreme right with 
the other implements placed in the order in which 
they are to be employed. There should not be an 
extravagant display of silver, and if the meal is in 
many courses, it is best to place the silver with the 
course instead of having it all on the table at the 
beginning. 

The knife is used for cutting meats and for spread- 
ing butter when butter spreaders are not furnished. 
Few things so quickly mark a man as vulgar as using 
it to carry or to help carry food to the mouth. Bread 
should be buttered and meat should be cut as it is 
eaten. Only when the child is so small that the 
mother or the nurse has to do it for him is it permissi- 
ble to butter the whole slice of bread at once or cut 
the whole portion of meat into mouthfuls. 

The fork is held in the right hand, tines up, except 
when it is used in conjunction with the knife to cut 
meats. It is never grasped in a belligerent fist in 
spite of the fact that this seems to be the way Nature 
directs. It is used to convey most foods to the mouth, 
to cut lettuce, chicory, salads, frozen puddings, 
melons, ices, and so on, but it is never used to mash 
foods together or to shovel them into the mouth. 
When it is not in active service it rests upon the 
plate and at the conclusion of the meal or when the 
plate is passing for a second helping, it and the knife 
lie across it, points toward the centre, handles on the 


20 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


edge. The knife and fork should never be balanced 
in midair while their owner talks or waits for his 
plate to come back to him, nor should the fork 
loaded with food ever be poised halfway between the 
plate and the mouth. 

The spoon is used to stir tea, coffee, etc., and to 
convey soups, certain desserts and cereals, soft-boiled 
eggs, and other foods of the same kind to the mouth. 
After a beverage has been stirred and a few spoonfuls 
sipped to test the temperature and sweetness the 
spoon is laid aside. It should never be allowed to 
remain in a vessel from which one is drinking and 
it should not be perched against cups or glasses so 
that it is likely to tumble out on the tablecloth. 
Soups should be dipped up with an outward motion 
and sipped from the side of the spoon. Only the 
amount of any food that can be taken into the mouth 
at one time should ever be lifted on a spoon. 

Breads, crackers, celery, radishes, nuts, most raw 
fruits, bonbons, corn on the cob, olives, and many 
other similar foods are eaten with the fingers. 
(Crackers should never swim around in a plate of 
soup but should be placed at one side. Small ones 
need not be broken up but larger ones are eaten in 
the same way that any other bread is consumed.) 
Cake is eaten with the fork when it is in layers but i 
small cakes, lady fingers, macaroons, etc., are eaten ^ 
with the fingers. Small sandwiches are taken into 
the fingers, but an elaborate affair of tomatoes, bacon, 
chicken, and lettuce cannot be so easily disposed of. 


Table Manners 


21 


Apples, pears, peaches, and other similar fruits are cut 
into quarters, and the quarters peeled and eaten with 
the fingers. Oranges except when they are served in 
halves to be eaten with a pointed spoon should be 
peeled and cut into mouthfuls. Eating them plug by 
plug is a tedious and unbecoming process. Agree- 
ment has not been reached as to the propriety of 
taking up a piece of asparagus with the fingers, 
dipping it in sauce, and carrying it to the mouth, but 
such a performance which at its best is ungraceful 
is not to be encouraged. Burr artichokes are eaten 
leaf by leaf, each leaf being first dipped into sauce. 
Bones are never taken up in the fingers except when 
one is dining with intimate friends and the hostess 
urges it. 

The plates are warmed (not heated) for the hot 
courses and cooled for ices and certain salads, and 
the waiter (and the art of waiting on the table is 
something else which belongs in the catalogue of 
things every child should know) should test the tem- 
perature of a dish carefully before lifting it. Dishes 
are presented at the left of each person beginning 
with the lady at the right of the host with the first 
course and varying thereafter so that the same 
person will not be served last every time. No word 
of invitation is necessary as viands are presented. 
Glasses should be kept filled with water throughout 
the meal. Vegetables, since they are not pleasing 
to look at, should not be allowed to remain on the 
table, and after they have been passed once should 


22 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


be placed on a side table until later when they are 
passed a second time. 

Salt may be very troublesome in damp climates or 
during humid spells of weather. It should be thor- 
oughly dried before it is brought to the table and 
the diners will not be driven to desperate measures 
such as pounding the cellar on the table or the palm 
of the hand or unscrewing the top and emptying a 
part of the contents on the side of the plate. Only 
in the kitchen should one ever take a pinch of salt 
between the fingers, to season food. In the dining 
room the tip of the knife or the tines of the fork may 
be used to distribute it. Open salt cellars with a salt 
spoon are preferable to the old-fashioned shakers. i 

Salt cellars, bonbon dishes, and other small dishes 
are never placed on the centrepiece but are set out 
toward the edge of the table. Nothing should ever 
be placed on a table that has no practical use there. 
The centrepiece should furnish a veritable feast for 
the eye and should be chosen not only for its intrinsic 
beauty but for the way in which it fits into the sur- 
roundings. Candles are very decorative but they 
should never be used with electric lights nor in a 
small dining room on a hot day. Blue or green 
shades make the light a ghostly glare but red, rose, 
or yellow gives a soft radiant glow which is infinitely 
pleasing, or the candles may be left unshaded and the 
effect is charming. 


CHAPTER III 


CULTURE 

u Then Nature said, 1 A lovelier flower 
On earth was never sown; 

This Child I to myself will take ; 

She shall be mine , and I will make 
A Lady of my own* ” 

ENVIRONMENT 

T HE poet blithely says that it is as easy to be 
good in June as it is for the grass to be green 
or the skies to be blue. Mothers will hardly 
agree with this but it is beyond question that it is 
easier to conduct oneself with grace and good feeling 
toward all men in pleasant surroundings than in sordid 
hovels among people who are irritable from overwork. 

If we could rightly know how to enlist the aid of 
Nature our problem would be solved and there would 
be no need for a book on etiquette for young folks. 
Thrice blessed is the child who lives where he can 
spend most of his time in God's great out of doors, 
not that of the city streets, and has someone to teach 
his mind to see and his heart to understand. But 
even he cannot stay always in the woods and fields 


23 


24 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


gathering beauty of mind and soul and strength of 
body from the floating clouds, the stars of midnight, 
the murmuring rivulets, and the other things which 
Wordsworth tells about; and his home, like that of 
every other child, should be furnished in such a way as 
to create an atmosphere of good breeding. In many 
houses one may find the enlarged portrait of Uncle 
Ebenezer and the gaudy chromos of such beasts as 
never were on sea or land in Mary’s or Johnny’s room 
because, forsooth, there is nowhere else to put them. 
Alas, that this should be true! Better to risk Uncle 
Ebenezer’s life-long wrath and the paltry legacy which 
he may leave behind by confiding him to the kitchen 
stove than that little souls thirsting for beauty look 
up and find only this. 

We are at home in what we are most accustomed 
to, and the child who does not have culture as a part 
of his daily food will not have the “nameless grace 
of polished ease” when he finds himself among people 
to whom it is as natural as the air they breathe. 

There is a good deal of misapprehension as to just 
what culture is; and because of a wrong conception of 
what constitutes a well-bred man the most polite 
ages have been called the least virtuous. A child 
who is trained to extreme proficiency in some branch 
of the arts or sciences but allowed at the same time to 
retain or develop a churlish, boorish manner cannot 
be called cultured any more than the one who, to the 
neglect of his mental, moral, and physical being is 
trained to an outward show of politeness. Briefly, 


Culture 


25 


culture is the development of all of a man’s qualities, 
mental, moral, and physical, to the place where he can 
most enjoy life and best serve mankind. There is no 
such thing as perfection of refinement, but as the 
mind and soul expand the standard of morals, man- 
ners, and tastes expands. The “perfect lady” and 
the “perfect gentleman” are people whom we do not 
like to meet, and in culture, which is merely another 
name for complete education, the consciousness of 
ignorance is the beginning of wisdom. 

It is no easy task — this thing of giving culture and 
refinement, especially in the face of the distressing 
old saws about silk purses and sows’ ears, thorn bushes 
and date palms and Plato’s dictum: “A boy is the 
most vicious of all wild beasts.” But there are 
degrees of excellence even among thorn trees, and 
the thorn as well as the date has its uses. The most 
comforting and most applicable of the proverbs laden 
with the wisdom of ages is the one which says that 
time and patience will change the mulberry leaf into 
satin. And both time and patience are needed in 
giving to a child a “cheerful, intelligent face” which 
according to Emerson is the end of culture, and in 
itself is success enough for any one. 

CONVERSATION 

I T IS not fair to the child to let the conversation 
in the home degenerate into inane drivel, idle or 
malicious gossip, complaining remarks about the 


26 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


price of necessities, or a series of Johnny , donts . All 
sorts of things are left to talk about — the delightful 
happenings of the day, jokes, pleasantries, plans for 
other days, current events, except murder cases and 
sensational scandals; even politics of the masculine 
part of the household (and feminine, too, in these 
days of equal rights) can enter this realm without too 
great vehemence. 

Particular pains should be taken to use language 
dipped from “purest wells of English, undefiled,” for 
next to excellencies of character no more valuable 
passport can be given to the little pilgrim as he starts 
down the long highway of life than a comprehensive 
knowledge of his mother tongue and a facility in us- 
ing it. 

Almost as important as the content of the conversa- 
tion is the tone of voice and manner in which it is 
carried on. Children are quick to imitate, and whole 
families are sometimes very disagreeable to talk to 
because the mother or some other highly influential 
member has a displeasing voice and the others have 
caught her inflection. Lord Chesterfield’s idea of a 
gentleman (we do not say perfect gentleman) was a 
man in whom were united the solid character and 
worth of the Englishman and the grace and ease of 
the Frenchman. Among the many elements which 
entered into the combination there were few over 
which he showed more concern in the letters which 
he wrote to the son of whom he was trying to make 
such a gentleman than the matter of enunciation. 


Culture 


27 


He begs the boy to read aloud to his tutor and ask him 
to correct him when he falls into a rapid and unin- 
telligible mutter and to try in every way to cure 
himself of it. From the time of Shakespeare and 
many years before to the time of the telephone, and 
we may be sure for many years after, great emphasis 
has been placed on the gentle voice — the voice with 
the smile. 


BOOKS 

TF A father held his son and forced strawberry 
shortcake down his throat he would not be sur- 
prised if the child hated him and despised the cake 
even though under ordinary circumstances it might 
be his favorite dessert. Yet most parents present 
books to their children in very much the same way 
and then wonder why Mary and Johnny turn away 
from those they ought to like and seek hidden places 
where they can revel in Nick Carter and the Duchess. 
There are very few books which can retain their 
popularity in the face of the parental and the peda- 
gogical urge — “Treasure Island” is one, “Little 
Women”, another — and the greatest service which 
the parent can offer is to surround the child with 
books and to indicate with the same polite civility 
with which he would offer shortcake that this book 
might be very pleasing. Picture books, biographies, 
story books, books of nature, books of history, books 
of all sorts should be at his disposal. 


28 Young Folks' Encyclopaedia of Etiquette 


Every child should have in addition to the family 
library a library of his own; and if he has his own 
book plate — and the shops carry a sufficient variety 
of designs for him to have one which suits his own 
small personality — his pride in possession will give 
added pleasure to his enjoyment of the contents of 
the volume. 

It is impossible for the average home to have all 
the books which the voracious appetite of a child 
demands but there is within reach a public library 
toward which the little feet should early be taught to 
turn. Books that pass unnoticed at home assume a 
new and alluring aspect when recommended by the 
mighty personage behind the desk at a public library. 
Borrowed books should be kept clean and returned 
promptly; and no book should ever be chewed, dog- 
eared (pages turned down at the corners), marked 
upon, torn, tossed about, left out in the rain, or other- 
wise abused. 

Of inestimable value in inculcating the principles 
of courtesy are the stories of men renowned for their 
chivalry whether they are men of the tenth or the 
twentieth centuries; and the life of every boy will be 
richer through contact with such characters as King 
Arthur, Sir Walter Raleigh, Sir Philip Sidney, King 
Albert, Washington, Lee, Joffre, Kitchener, and many 
another name which illuminates the pages of history 
through sheer nobility of character, for in the last 
analysis true courtesy is nobility of character. 

There are children who never learn to read. It is 


Culture 


29 


a great pity for it means that they are locked out of 
one of the most enchanting playgrounds of childhood, 
the dear Land of Story Books, as Stevenson calls it, 
a playground to which they can return as old men 
and women and find rest and comfort. There are 
other children who do not learn to read until their 
interest in something makes them want to find out 
more about it. Mark Twain was of this kind. He 
was on the verge of manhood before he began reading, 
and then it was a leaf from a book which blew across 
his pathway one afternoon as he was returning from 
the printing office where he worked that started him. 
It was only a fragment from the story of the life of 
Joan of Arc but it was enough to set on fire the imagi- 
nation of the lad and to lead to the voluminous and 
sympathetic reading which laid the foundation for 
his incomparable biography of the Maid of Orleans. 

TOYS 

I F IT be true that the nations are least civilized which 
have fewest things for their children to play 
with, the United States ranks high among civilized 
nations; and if it be true that the nations with the 
highest ideals are those which give their children 
most things to play with, then the ideals of the 
United States are well-nigh perfection, however far 
from attaining them she may be. Every normal 
American loves a toy, and on Christmas morning it is 
hard to say whether father or son has the better time 


30 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


with the little toy dog and the little tin soldier and 
the wonderfully made mechanical playthings. 

Toys should be chosen for their value in developing 
the imaginative and the emotional sides of a child’s 
nature, and those toys are best which leave most for 
the child to do. A top made from a spool and a piece 
of string is better, if the child himself makes it, than 
one elaborately constructed from steel and aluminum 
and furnished with a sort of music box which plays as 
it spins. The boy who gallops mile upon mile on a 
broomstick horse — steed far more gallant than ever 
Lochinvar bestrode — and the girl who yearns ten- 
derly over a rag doll — and oh, what bliss a weather- 
beaten rag doll can afford — these are they who can 
dream dreams — these are the stuff of which mighty 
nations are made. 


MUSIC 

A HOME without music is likely to be a home 
without harmony in other respects. Nothing 
so unites a family, nothing so quickly makes them 
forget the petty cares which infest the day, as gather-' 
ing around to sing while sister plays the piano and 
brother accompanies her on the violin. With the 
phonograph nearly everyone has an opportunity to 
become acquainted with the best the world has to 
offer in the way of music, and it is an excellent means 
of cultivating one’s taste; but machine-made melodies 
can never replace those made at home. 


Culture 


3i 


On the playground music furnishes a kind of dis- 
cipline which automatically does away with friction 
and keeps the children moving not only in harmony 
with the tune but with each other. And under the 
spell of melody a child’s best emotions are developed 
and intensified, patriotism, love, honor, loyalty, hope, 
and faith. 


CHAPTER IV 


“PERSONAL” 

“It is a part of good breeding that a man should be 
polite even to himself.” 

CLEANNESS 

T HERE are few children who enjoy having 
their necks and ears scrubbed but at the 
same time there are few who do not revel in 
the delicious feeling that comes from being perfectly 
clean after an orgy of dirt and sand. The disciples 
were taught that the body must be kept clean because 
it was the temple of the spirit, and this truth a child 
can grasp long before he can understand that the fu- 
ture of the race depends upon the cleanness and 
wholesomeness of its men and women. Secret clean- 
ness which the child owes to himself is more impor- 
tant than outward cleanness which he owes to the 
rest of the world. No one minds surface dirt if it is 
not of long standing. 

While the hour for bathing should not be turned 
over to such indoor sports as sailing bars of soap up 
and down the tub or splashing water nearly to the 
ceiling it should be managed so that the child will look 
32 


“ Personal ” 


33 


forward to it, if not with pleasure, at least not with 
dread, and those who administer the finishing touches 
should go about their task with mildness and delibera- 
tion. 

Strong soaps and strongly scented soaps should 
not be used, and whatever toilette preparations are 
employed should be known to be pure. A little bran 
or coarse meal is usually the only additional cosmetic 
needed even for the lad who tinkers with machinery. 
A few drops of household ammonia in the bath are 
better than perfume for removing any unpleasant 
smell of perspiration which may cling to the body. It 
does away with the odor instead of exchanging it for 
one almost as bad. Pumice stone and lemon juice 
should never be used. The pain they cause by get- 
ting into the tiny cuts and scratches that are on the 
hands of every normal child will very quickly crush 
any aspirations toward cleanliness which he may 
have been entertaining. 

The best time to look after the nails is immediately 
after the bath while the hands are soft. A nail brush 
and file, an orangewood stick, and a buffer constitute 
a small but efficient outfit. The nails should never 
be so long nor so pointed nor so polished as to be 
noticeable. Biting them is a detestable and un- 
sanitary habit brought on by neglect — instinctively 
a child uses his teeth to get rid of hang nails and 
ragged edges — and like many another is easier to 
prevent than to cure. Once it is formed a drastic 
but effective remedy is a little quinine or some other 


34 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


bitter substance rubbed on the tips of the fingers. 
Sucking the thumb is equally unhygienic, and aside 
from the disease germs which it introduces into the 
system, flattens the thumb, twists the mouth out of 
shape, and makes a most distressing spectacle for 
those who have to look at it. 

A mouth badly cared for makes even a pretty child 
ugly, and decaying teeth result in stomach troubles 
and other serious maladies not the least unpleasant 
by-product of which is an offensive breath. Such a 
condition can be easily avoided by daily use of a 
toothbrush and infrequent visits to the dentist. 
After meals and before bedtime particles should be 
removed from between the teeth with dental floss. 
Toothpicks are as much out of date among well-bred 
people as pillow shams. 


DRESS 



WELL-DRESSED person begins at the bottom. 


A soldier is said to be only as good as his feet; 
no one in agony over a pinching shoe is altogether 
responsible for what he does, and a child suffering 
with aching feet cannot be blamed for any violation 
of the laws of etiquette of which he may be guilty. 
Comfortable shoes, clean feet, and clean stockings 
will do away with ninety-nine and a half per cent, of 
all foot complaints. If they fail it is time to see a 
chiropodist. 

Neatness is usually the logical result of cleanness 


“ Personal ” 


35 


and both are necessary to the well-groomed child. 
Neatness, not the precision of crotchety old maids 
and prim young ones, but a nice attention to the 
details of dressing and caring for the person. 

It is the mother's prerogative to make herself as 
ridiculous and uncomfortable as she likes by the 
clothes she wears but this does not give her the right 
to do the same thing for her child. That which gives 
greatest freedom of movement and unites modesty 
with simplicity is the best dress for a child, or for 
any one else. Clothing should never be conspicuous. 
It was the boast of the best-dressed man England 
ever produced, Beau Brummel, that he could walk 
down the street unnoticed; and when a friend said to 
him, speaking of another, “He was so well-dressed 
that people turned to look at him,” the Beau answered 
with emphasis, “Then he was not well-dressed.” 

Good material is more important than costly orna- 
mentation. Dresses are like beauty unadorned — ■ 
adorned most when they are least adorned. They 
should be chosen not only for their beauty in them- 
selves but for the way in which they suit the small 
persons who are to wear them. They should fit and 
they should hang evenly around the bottom of the skirt . 

Children should wear no elaborate j ewels. Flowers 
and ribbons are more appropriate than pearls and 
rubies, but orchids, gardenias, and other rare and 
expensive blossoms should not be worn until after 
the middle teens are passed. 

Girls sin against the law of harmony in color more 


36 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


than boys because they have more opportunity, but 
both boys and girls should be taught not only what is 
pleasing in combination but what is becoming. 
Nearly all boys pass through a period when they 
want gaudy ties and love to wear in their buttonholes 
red roses almost as big as cabbages. While the spell 
is on them it is best not to deal with them too harshly 
— Ephraim is joined to his idols — and most of them 
grow out of it in the natural order of things. 

MODESTY 

l\/fODESTY of dress should be an outward sign 
of an innate delicacy of thought and feeling. 
This last has been called the most precious of all the 
qualities which a child may possess. In fact, “The 
first character of right childhood is that it is Modest. 
A well-bred child does not think it can teach its 
parents, or that it knows everything. It may think 
its father and mother know everything — perhaps that 
all grown people know everything; very certainly it 
is sure that it does not. And it is always asking 
questions, and wanting to know more.” 

Modesty should not be confused with ungainliness 
or bashfulness. There is nearly always an “ awkward 
age ” during which the child finds that he has long and 
troublesome arms and legs and that he does not know 
what to do with them. Dancing, swimming, riding, 
and other athletic sports are great helps in teaching 
graceful management of the unruly members. Un- 


“ Personal ” 


37 


wonted clumsiness is often a warning that something 
is wrong, defect in sight or hearing perhaps. Such 
cases should be given immediate and expert attention. 


ODDS AND ENDS 


COUGH or a sneeze should be stifled in the 



** handkerchief and the offender should say as 
soon as he has regained control of his breath, “Excuse 
me” or “I beg your pardon.” A yawn should be 
smothered in the same way. When the nose needs 
the ministration of a handkerchief it should be given 
as unobtrusively as possible, and a child with a bad 
cold should not be allowed in the presence of other 
people, especially at mealtime. 

Under no circumstances is it permissible to put the 
fingers into the nose or mouth, and, according to the 
good old proverb, nothing smaller than the elbow 
should ever be thrust into the ear. 


CHAPTER V 


HOME AND FAMILY 

And though home is a name , a word , it is a strong 
one ; stronger than magician ever spoke , or spirit an- 
swered to, in strongest conjuration A 

BROTHERS AND SISTERS 

F IRST of all there must be absolute justice in 
the administration of nursery affairs. Peace 
at any price is as costly here as it is in other 
and larger matters, if there be anything larger than 
the management of a home. There must be one 
guiding spirit and the children must respect a higher 
law than their own wills. No one realizes this better 
than they and no one is so quick to despise the person 
who spoils them as the children themselves, probably 
because they recognize the fundamental weakness of 
character which causes it. 

The older children are the natural protectors of the 
younger, and while they invariably defend them 
against outside attack they almost as invariably im- 
pose on them on their own account. Little boys and 
girls think it their right to have everything and do 
everything and go everywhere that their older broth- 
38 


Home and Family 


39 


ers and sisters do, but it is hardly prudent to give 
them so much freedom. Even the best of big 
brothers like a few good times utterly untrammelled, 
and everything that is suitable for a lad of thirteen 
or fourteen is not equally suitable for his brother of 
six or seven. It is a part of the duty of parents to see 
that there is tyranny from neither side. 

Mutual helpfulness makes a happy home. When 
each member of the family takes his share of the 
burden of the housework it leaves the mother more 
time to be a mother and it leaves them all more time 
to devote to the enjoyment of life. A brother will 
escort his sister to a party or run an errand for her 
very readily if he knows that the next time he wants 
a button sewed on or a ripped seam mended or a 
picnic lunch packed she will do it for him without his 
having to “beg the life out of her,” to use one of his 
own not very elegant expressions. Daily contact in 
the family circle will either wear off sharp corners and 
rough edges or make them worse. Nagging and 
spiteful criticism are always highly injurious, but 
suggestions tactfully offered should be gratefully 
received, and in all their intercourse with each other 
brothers and sisters should be moved by kindness. 
It is the only force strong enough to hold society to- 
gether and it must first knit together society’s small- 
est unit — the home. 

Every child has the right to privacy. No one 
should ever enter his room without first knocking at 
the door and no one should ever disturb his personal 


40 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


belongings without his permission. The letters 
which come to him are his own property and his 
should be the privilege of opening them and saying 
who else should read them. It is as dishonorable to 
read the letters of someone else without leave as it is 
to watch through a keyhole or to eavesdrop behind 
a curtain, but a parent will have a hard time teaching 
a child so if he or she reads every missive which comes 
to him whether he wishes it or not. Inquisitiveness 
with regard to the affairs of another is always rude, 
and personal questions are impertinent even when 
addressed to a brother or sister. 

Indiscriminate borrowing always causes trouble. 
No article should ever be borrowed without permis- 
sion and it should be returned in as good condition as 
when it was taken. For sanitary reasons children 
should not be allowed to wear each other’s clothes 
promiscuously. This is not intended as propaganda 
against the practice of handing down outgrown gar- 
ments but as a protest against the interchange of 
articles of apparel that ought to be intimate as a hair 
brush or toothbrush. 

OLDER PEOPLE 

T TNFORTUNATE from many points of view is the 
^ gap which often lies between the American 
child and its father and mother. The children have 
had advantages — frequently through great self-denial 
on the part of their parents — and their standard of 


Home and Family 


4i 


living is different. If the moral training has kept 
pace with the intellectual growth this is a cause for 
rejoicing, but if the child has so pitifully warped a 
view of life that he is ashamed of his father and 
mother the situation is tragic. Happily, in many 
homes the children are proud of the brave struggle 
their parents have made and the parents themselves 
are pathetically proud of the education which has 
made a “ lady ” or a “ gentleman ” of Mary or Johnny 
or Rachael or Isidore and are anxious to catch some 
part of this wonderful thing from them. The pres- 
ence of one refined person in a home elevates the 
standard of that home, and many a small son or 
daughter has been the means of lifting his mother 
and father from squalor to decency. It is never per- 
missible for a child to correct his parent except 
through a polite suggestion that he do so and so or an 
“I beg your pardon, sir, but aren’t you mistaken?” 
Nothing so quickly marks the person who has 
“climbed” and feels somehow that it was a disgrace- 
ful thing to have done, as for a child to grow restive 
under his parent’s behavior in public. Bringing up 
father, except through the exertion of a quiet influ- 
ence, is at its best a sorry task. 

Between parent and child there should be a feeling 
of comradeship based on love and respect on the one 
side, love and protective care on the other. Toward 
his mother both at home and abroad a lad should show 
all the deference and solicitude which he would accord 
a sweetheart whom he was most anxious to please. 


42 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Children do not always find it easy to be patient 
with old people, but the fact that it is difficult to ex- 
act is no reason why courtesy, and special courtesy 
at that, should not be required of them. It is hard 
enough after the fires of life have nearly burned out 
to sit by the ashes waiting for the last spark to flicker 
into darkness without the thoughtless cruelty of 
youth to make it harder. Most old people live in 
the memories of the past and love to tell of things that 
happened long ago. A child who is kind — and that 
usually means one who is well-bred — can listen to 
these stories not once but many times without letting 
the narrator know that they are extremely tiresome. 

In the evening when the family gathers in the liv- 
ing room the children should yield to the older people 
the most comfortable chairs and the privilege of hav- 
ing first look at the evening paper even when the 
hero of the comic section is at the most thrilling point 
in his career. This does not mean that the youngsters 
should be made to sit on hard benches or do penance 
in any way, but simply that they should learn to 
bestow as a matter of habit as well as principle the 
many thoughtful attentions which go toward making 
up 


“that best portion of a^good man's life , 
His little nameless , unremembered acts 
Of kindness and of love." 


Their conduct toward those of the household out- 
side the immediate family the children will regulate 
by the standard set by their mother and father. 


Home and Family 


43 


Rarely does a child reverence or respect anything or 
anybody that his parents hold in contempt; and a 
governness or a resident chaperon who cannot be 
granted genuine friendship rather than merely polite 
tolerance is not a suitable person to place in charge 
of the instruction or training of children. 

The bald monosyllables, “ Yes ” and “ No ” are never 
very pleasing when addressed to an older person, and 
since 

Yes, Sir ,' to a gentleman 
And ‘Yes, Ma'am,’ to a lady " 

are considered somewhat provincial and old-fashioned 
“Yes, father” and “Yes, mother” may be substi- 
tuted, but here as well as elsewhere it is the manner 
which counts more than what is actually said. 

SERVANTS 

TN THE majority of American homes the mother is 
the chief servant. This fact alone ought to make 
it unnecessary to impress upon her children the 
dignity of manual labor. The mother is at fault 
when she lets herself degenerate into a drudge doing 
for her children only what a hired girl could do as 
well. They need a mother more than they do a 
servant and by helping with the work themselves 
they can have one. No girl was ever degraded by 
washing dishes and no boy was ever any the less a man 
because he had to draw water or feed the chickens 
or bring in stove wood. 


44 Young Folks' Encyclopedia, of Etiquette 


A child should never be permitted to lord it over 
a hired girl or to interfere with her work. Aside 
from the fact that she is paid for doing something 
besides entertaining him, the average domestic ser- 
vant picked up at an employment agency is not the 
kind of companion a careful mother would choose for 
her child. 

Whether the children call a servant by her first 
or last name or whether they prefix a title depends 
upon the age of the servant and the length of time she 
has been with the family. She should call the chil- 
dren by their given names only when they are very 
young or when she has been in the household for a 
number of years. The best general rule is for the 
children to follow their parents. In England it is 
customary to call a servant by her last name, but in 
this country the first name is often given preference. 

Perfect courtesy is the best protection against dis- 
courtesy in other people, especially those of inferior 
social position who make the mistake of trying to 
assert their independence through insolence, and in 
all his dealings with servants a child should be even 
more scrupulously polite than he is with his own 
friends. 

PETS 

TN EVERY home where there is a child there should 
be something alive which he can love and call his 
own. Through his attachment for an animal that 
belongs to him he develops thoughtfulness, sympathy, 


Home and Family 


45 


responsibility, love, and often fortitude, for in many 
cases tragedy first comes into his life through the 
death of a pet. The child who is inclined to be care- 
less of the right of dumb creatures to life, liberty, and 
the pursuit of happiness can be checked in his bar- 
baric tendencies if he is given a cat or a dog or a 
guinea pig or a goat or an alligator of his own and 
taught to relate it to all other animal life. 

Pets should not be forced upon the attention of 
visitors and the mother should watch carefully to see 
that the children take no harm. Even the best- 
loved dog is hardly fit bedfellow for his young master 
no matter how he and the dog feel about it. 


CHAPTER VI 


WHEN COMPANY COMES 

“The ornament of a house is the friends that frequent it ” 

COMPANY 

T O A child the fact that company is coming 
does not mean that the little boy or girl next 
door will hop over the fence to play in the 
backyard but that a terrible array of grown-ups will 
sit around in the house and talk, while he also is 
compelled to sit around without the privilege of talk- 
ing, in clothes so wretchedly uncomfortable that 
even when there is in prospect a dinner much better 
than that which he has every day, it is hardly suffi- 
cient compensation for the agony of body and mind 
which he has to undergo. To a mother, and all this 
is true when children are trained to so dismal a thing 
as company manners, it means many moments 
fraught with anxiety lest her young son or daughter 
bring disgrace upon the family by some untoward 
word or deed. 

Children and visitors should never be forced upon 
each other. If there is a common ground they will 
find it without help, and if there is not there is no 

46 


When Company Comes 


47 


way in which either can add greatly to the happiness 
of the other. A child should be taught or rather, 
allowed, to be natural in the presence of company, 
so long as this does not mean also being a nuisance. 

THE VISITOR’S RIGHTS 

/ T'HE presence of a child imposes a restraint upon 
conversation, and while children should not 
be banished from the room in which their mother is 
entertaining, they should not be allowed to hover 
around or to annoy the caller with personal atten- 
tions. Even when she utters a polite protest that it 
does not matter, and she could hardly do less, the 
mother must positively forbid the youngster standing 
so close to her as to be an irritation or climbing into 
her lap unless he is invited to do so. One of the first 
lessons a child has to learn is that the moon for 
all its golden beauty was not made to be handled 
and that there are many shining and wonderful things 
that were not made to be eaten, not even made to be 
touched. Among these are the garments, the purse, 
the parasol, the handbag, and all the other possessions 
of a visitor. 

A child should not take an active part in the con- 
versation of his mother and her guests unless the 
older people introduce him into it; and never should 
he interrupt rudely or burst into the room and ask 
them what they are talking about. If he wishes 
to say something to his mother that cannot be post- 


48 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


poned he should enter the room quietly, greet the 
caller, stand beside his mother’s chair until a pause 
offers itself, excuse himself, say what he has to say, 
and depart. 

Nothing will prevent a child’s asking questions — 
good fortune for the human race that this is true — 
but careful training will prevent his asking personal 
ones. A visitor’s peculiarities should not be re- 
marked upon in her presence nor talked over criti- 
cally after her departure. Everyone has the right 
to be judged by his or her best qualities, in the pres- 
ence of children at least, though many people fail to 
recognize it. 

Matters of a strictly private nature should never 
be introduced when there is a guest present. If she 
has any delicacy at all she will be very much embar- 
rassed, and whatever grievances the members of a. 
family have against each other they should thresh 
out among themselves. Family skeletons are hide- 
ous objects, and while there is a stranger within the 
gates they should be kept in the darkest corner of the 
closet. 

THE CHILD’S RIGHTS 

TT WAS Dickens who said that we never see an old 
head on young shoulders without feeling a desire 
to knock it off; and surely there ought to be a special 
place in purgatory reserved for those people who by dis- 
cussing children in their presence destroy that divine 
innocence which is half the beauty of childhood and 


When Company Comes 


49 


make the youngsters grow old and worldly wise before 
their time. The first right of all children is the right 
to their childhood. Compliments make them vain 
and criticisms make them unhappy. They are more 
sensitive than their elders think and no one knows 
how many a bitter moment has been spent because 
of thoughtless comments on large noses, stringy hair, 
or unlovely complexions. Little girls develop frail 
constitutions because they hear so many times that 
they are delicate that they finally decide that it must 
be true, and little boys out of sheer perversity try 
to live up to the reputation which their parents 
have given them of being the worst children in the 
world. 

It is natural for a mother to want her friends to 
know and admire her children but she should, nay, 
she must resist the temptation of showing them off. 
It spoils the children and bores the visitor. Even 
when the child is not in the room the caller should not 
be regaled with a eulogy of his excellent qualities and 
his prospects for a brilliant future. Of course Johnny 
is the most wonderful boy in the world, but the fact 
ought to be so apparent as to need no proof. 

BIG SISTER'S CALLERS 

T HERE is a strong element of coarseness in the 
character of a person who can make any of the 
sacred relationships of life the subjects for jesting; 
and indelicate comments or rude teasing about court- 


50 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


ship and marriage are grossly unrefined. Never 
should a child embarrass his sister or the young men 
who call on her by his words or his conduct either 
while they are in the house or afterward. When one 
member of the family has company all the others 
should do what they can to make the visit delightful. 

REFRESHMENTS 

F ROM the time she is old enough to pass a plate 
a girl should begin to learn how gracefully to 
dispense hospitality in her own home. Whether she 
does it under necessity or by her own volition or her 
mother's command she should train herself to serve 
a meal with ease and dexterity. There are few tasks 
which require greater skill in using the mind and body 
and there are few which are more essentially womanly. 
At an informal tea she and her brother may help 
by handing cups or collecting used dishes. 

AT THE FRONT DOOR 

TN HOMES where there is no maid to answer the 
doorbell this duty often falls upon the children. 
Upon opening the door a child should stand aside and 
invite the caller into the drawing room and ask her 
to be seated. Then he should inform his mother, 
by going to her, not by yelling at her, that Mrs. 
So-and-So is waiting, and come back and talk to her 
until his mother appears. 


When Company Comes 


Si 


Chief among the unwelcome rings for admittance 
are those which come from agents and salesmen. 
All of these people should be received politely. They 
are human, even those who have books to sell; and 
when it is necessary to turn them away without an 
interview it can be done with some such phrase as, 
“Mother is busy and cannot see you now,” or 
“Mother is ill and begs to be excused.” 

OVER THE TELEPHONE 
CHILD should not be sent to answer the tele- 



^ ^ phone until he is old enough to do so intelli- 
gently. The telephone is a convenience, not a play- 
thing. All calls whether they are of a business or a 
social nature should be answered briefly, definitely, 
and courteously. Party lines should not be used 
for long, meaningless conversations, and confidences 
should never be exchanged over a telephone wire. 


CHAPTER VII 


OTHER PEOPLE’S CHILDREN 

“ 'Mid the mighty , 'mid the mean 
Little children may be seen , 

Like the flowers that spring up fair , 

Bright and countless everywhere 

SELECTING PLAYMATES 

I F CHILDREN are to be good-mannered they must 
have well-behaved playmates. Within certain 
limits the child should choose these himself but al- 
ways under the supervision of his parents, particularly 
of his mother who should be his chief friend and guide. 

Generally speaking, a child is happier when his 
companions are his own kind of people so far as 
wealth, culture, and social position are concerned, but 
the only real obstruction to friendship should be some 
contagious defect of character or manner. Young- 
sters should not be educated into a way of thinking 
that they are better than other people or that other 
people are better than they, or into any kind of an 
idea of class consciousness, and the artificial barriers 
which are erected by a complex social system should 
not be allowed to interfere with the spontaneous 
attachments that spring up among children. 

52 


Other People's Children 


53 


No companionship is better than bad companion- 
ship, and every child ought to be able to spend several 
happy hours a day alone. There is great satisfaction 
to be had from making friends with oneself. 

THE UNDESIRABLE PLAYMATE 

A VICIOUS, rude, spoiled, vulgar, or untruthful 
child must be gotten rid of at whatever cost it 
takes. His parent is always to blame. A child can- 
not be held to account because he has been neglected 
or mismanaged, but at the same time he cannot be 
allowed to taint the atmosphere of another home. 
It is no easy matter, but with tact and diplomacy 
the process of elimination can be carried on so quietly 
that no one but the woman who is engineering it is 
aware of it. Most of the time the best course to pur- 
sue is simply to allow all intercourse with the family 
to lapse. There are not many women who will con- 
tinue to allow their children to go to homes where 
they themselves are not recognized. The difficulty 
is greatly increased when the mother of the objection- 
able youngster is a dear friend, but when the welfare 
of a child demands the sacrifice of a friend a mother 
has but one course to follow. 

For a serious fault or a flagrant misdemeanor a 
mother may send a visitor from her house and pro- 
hibit his ever returning, but she cannot punish him 
in any other way, and she should not, even if she 
asks for it, give the mother of the young offender an 


54 Young Folks' Encyclopaedia, of Etiquette 


account of his misdeeds. He himself is the one from 
whom she must get her information. 

THE PERSISTENT CALLER 

TT OFTEN happens that a child who is neglected 
* in his own home finds that of a neighbor so delight- 
ful that he spends most of his time there. He should 
never be treated ungraciously — the poor little fellow 
may be very unhappy — but at the same time he 
should not be allowed to disarrange the routine of the 
household. Lessons and other duties must go on 
just the same. The visitor may be asked to join 
in; often this is all that is necessary to make him beat 
a hasty retreat. If he should prolong his stay until 
late at night it is not only permissible but even ad- 
visable for the hostess to suggest that since it is 
growing dark his mother is probably anxious about 
him. If his visits are so frequent as to conflict with 
the outings of his small hosts their mother may send 
them about their way, apologizing for their departure 
if it is something in which he cannot join; but delib- 
erate unkindness to a child, especially to one who is 
instinctively seeking the hospitality of one's roof, is 
unforgivable. 


THE NEW FRIEND 

T^VERY new friend should be received into the 
home where the mother can best judge the fitness 
of continuing the acquaintance. These little people 


Other People* s Children 


55 


should be given a sympathetic rather than a critical 
examination and minor faults passed over. The 
child who finds that his mother objects to all of his 
friends will keep them away from her, a thing which 
he will not find difficult, since the average youngster 
is not at home during the greater part of the day. 
The immediate results of an estrangement between 
mother and son over the qualities of his playmates 
are a roughness of manner and speech picked up from 
even less desirable associates and a feeling of distrust 
where there should be confidence. The ultimate 
results are not so easily stated. They reach to the 
end of the journey. 

Often a child makes a friend whose parents are un- 
known to his. There is no objection to this but it is 
always more pleasant when the older people find 
that they, too, are congenial. If he should wish to 
ask this friend to his home to a party or dinner he 
may do so but his invitation should be seconded by a 
cordial note from his mother to the mother of the 
other child. 


HAVING COMPANY 

T HE young host should respect the sanctity of his 
roof and should never, if he can help it, allow 
anything unpleasant to happen to a visitor while he is 
beneath it. It is the visitor's royal right to be “It” 
in most of the games, to have the best part of the re- 
freshments, and to decide what shall be done to pass 


56 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


the time. The objection that Johnny will bring to 
this is that Jimmy and Mary do not treat him so / 
when he goes to their houses and that he gets left out 
at both ends of the game. But Johnny must learn, 
and the sooner the better, that he cannot measure 
his conduct by that of other people and that the 
meanest of all poor excuses is the one introduced by 
our late father Adam, “She did it and I followed.” 

The room in which a guest is to spend the night 
should contain, in addition to necessities and com- 
forts, flowers, books, games, stamps, stationery, and 
other little luxuries that betoken a thoughtful host, 
and while he occupies it the young visitor should be 
made to feel that it really belongs to him. 

WHEN JOHNNY GOES A-VISITING 

I T IS the exceptional mother who can watch her son 
or daughter go visiting whether it be for an after- 
noon or a week without having, though perhaps not 
in the same words, the prayer of Mrs. Ruggles on 
her lips, “ ’n the Lord have mercy on ye ’n help ye 
to act decent.” The eve of his departure is not a 
propitious time for burdening him with directions as 
to what to do and what not to do; and the only way 
that she can have any assurance that he will “act 
decent” is to have his conduct at home the kind that 
she would not be ashamed for outsiders to see. 

Children should not visit indiscriminately and their 
mother should feel that a welcome is waiting for them 


Other People's Children 


57 


in the houses to which she allows them to go. They 
should not ring the door bells with a loud and persis- 
! tent clamor and they should not stare at things in the 
house nor point at them nor comment upon them 
except to admire. 

It is safer to send a child to visit people whose 
standard of living is above his rather than those 
who have not as much as he has been accustomed to, 
especially if he is to eat with them. Any bright 
child can find his way through an elaborate table 
service by watching how the other diners do it, but 
it is only the one whose politeness is that of kings 
that can eat where no napkins are supplied or where 
there are not enough knives to go around without 
trying to impress his host with a sense of his superior- 
ity. The essence of good manners both at home and 
abroad is adaptability. 

If his visit is to be of several days’ duration a child 
should come with his clothes pressed and with all his 
toilette accessories conveniently at hand and with 
the knowledge that he must adjust his hours of 
eating and sleeping to those of his host, and that he 
must throw himself heartily into whatever they have 
planned for his pleasure. He should not ask special 
favors of the servants, but at the conclusion of his 
visit he should tip them, the amount depending upon 
the length of his visit and the scale upon which the 
household is managed. When he gets ready to de- 
part for his home he should thank those who have 
entertained him for the pleasant time he has had; 


58 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


and even if he has been in the home for only one meal 
he should go to the mistress of the house and tell her 
of his appreciation and enjoyment of her hospitality. 
After a visit of several days it is customary to write a 
“ bread-and-butter ” letter which simply reiterates 
what was said at parting. 

One of the most difficult of all the minor social 
accomplishments is the art of saying good-bye grace- 
fully. Many a time a person has sat awkwardly on 
the edge of a chair long after he has decided that it 
was time to leave simply because he did not know how 
to get up and go. It is a good rule for children never 
to dawdle over their good-byes and not to say tenta- 
tively several times before they depart, “Well, I 
must be going.” Lingering farewells are the privilege 
of lovers and no one else. 

Violation of the laws of hospitality is all the more 
heinous a crime because they are not to be found in 
any of the statute books. The Arab, whose home is 
only a tent in a desert, never betrays the man who 
has broken bread with him; and the child who makes 
disparaging remarks about people in whose homes 
he has been received as a welcome guest profanes 
one of the most sacred of human relationships. Un- 
less hospitality can be accepted frankly and un- 
reservedly it should not be accepted at all. 


CHAPTER VIII 


IN PUBLIC 

“Life is not so short but that there is always time 
enough for courtesy .” 


DEPORTMENT ON THE STREET 

D EPORTMENT on the street should never 
attract attention. Quietness in dress goes a 
long way but it must be supported by quiet- 
ness in manner. It is not because they are struck 
with admiration that people turn to look at a child 
who dresses so freakishly or talks and laughs so 
loudly as to make himself or herself conspicuous. 
They would do as much for a monkey or a band 
wagon. 

Civic pride is one of the cardinal points of courtesy 
and a well-bred child never does anything that will 
make his town less beautiful. Personal pride is 
another, and a well-bred child never does anything 
that will cheapen him. Eating on the street is a re- 
prehensible practice, and one of the worst offenses 
against the tenets of good breeding, short of actually 
disturbing the peace, is chewing gum. Even in the 
59 


6o Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


privacy of one's room this should not be indulged in. 
The flavor lasts. So does the habit. For children 
under twenty-one there is only one rule of etiquette 
with regard to smoking: Don't. 

Good manners are not to be found in the gutter and 
the place to loaf and invite the soul is not on the 
corner of the street. Boys should not lounge in front 
of the drug store and girls should not parade aimlessly 
up and down the sidewalk; and while children should 
not be kept in cloistered seclusion they should not be 
allowed to spend most of their time idling on the pave- 
ments, not as long as there is work to be done and 
games to be played. 

Nothing in connection with the fine art of being a 
gentleman is so abjectly terrifying to the adolescent 
male as to have to act as escort to some young mem- 
ber of the opposite sex, and it is very slight consola- 
tion to know that his companion is as embarrassed 
over the proper way to receive his attentions as he 
is over offering them. The lad who has been accus- 
tomed to paying the little courtesies expected of an 
escort to his mother and sisters is more fortunate than 
he realizes. The anguish which comes from not 
knowing just the right thing to do is very keen, 
especially when one is struggling with the perplexi- 
ties of the early 'teens. When he is walking down 
the street with a girl a lad should place himself 
so as to afford most protection to his compan- 
ion, walking next to the throng when the street is 
crowded, next to the outer edge of the pavement 


In Public 


61 


under ordinary conditions. Only when the street 
is rough, muddy, slippery, or dark should he offer 
his arm for support. Then the girl should place her 
hand in the crook of his elbow, not lock her arm 
through his. 

Children should be warned against walking 
down the street three or four arm in arm, or push- 
ing their way along recklessly disregardful of every- 
body else, or stopping in the midst of a throng to 
talk. 


SALUTATIONS 

TT IS a mistaken idea which prevails chiefly among 
people who are not sure of their social position that 
they elevate themselves by refusing to speak to 
those whom they consider beneath them. Innate 
fineness of spirit is the only thing which can elevate, 
and no one was ever yet demeaned by speaking cour- 
teously and uncondescendingly to whatever acquain- 
tances he or she happened to encounter. The 
story has been told many times of how George 
Washington, upon meeting a negro who raised his 
hat in salutation, lifted his own in response, and of 
how, when a friend remonstrated, the great general 
answered, “Do you suppose that I am going to per- 
mit a poor, ignorant, colored man to be more polite 
than I am?” 

It is usually considered the proper thing for a lad 
to wait for a girl to speak and for a child to wait for 


62 Young Folks’ Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


an older person but among friends greetings should 
be almost simultaneous. 


HATS AND CAPS 


N IMAGINATIVE mother can invest the pro- 



sa i c duty of lifting one's hat with something 
of the charm of the days of chivalry if she connects 
it with the knightly practice of removing the helmet 
in the presence of a lady. The hand shake also traces 
its origin back to the days when every man carried a 
weapon and the giving of the right hand or weapon 
hand meant a pledge of friendship and peace. A 
child will do a thing much more readily when he sees 
some reason for doing it, and both of these simple 
acts of courtesy retain more than a slight measure of 
their original significance. 

The hat should not be lifted with an elaborate bow 
nor a flourish nor a well-Tve-got-to-do-it-I-might-as- 
well-get-it-over languor but with a quick movement 
which says better than words that the little tribute 
is a pleasure to the one offering it. 

A boy should never allow his head to remain cov- 
ered in the house. Opinion is divided as to what he 
should do in an elevator but when there are only a 
few people in the car, especially if some of them are 
ladies, it is more courteous to remove the hat but 
if the car is so crowded that it is in danger of be- 
ing crushed the obvious place for it is on the head. 
The bright-colored skull caps should never be worn 


In Public 


63 


except on the athletic field and many people object 
to them even there on the ground that they induce 
baldness. 

A boy should lift his hat when he greets a girl, a 
woman, or a man much older than himself, but to a 
youngster of his own age he may wave his hand, 
smile, or say “Hello” or its equivalent. When he 
greets a friend when he is with a girl or when she 
speaks to a friend even though that friend be un- 
known to him he should raise his hat. When he 
brushes against some one accidentally he should lift 
his hat as he utters a quick apology. It should also 
be lifted when he offers some one his seat in a crowded 
car or supplies a bit of information to a stranger or 
performs some other similar service. If any one 
offers a polite attention to a girl whom he is escorting 
the escort acknowledges it by touching his hat. 

ON STREET CARS, ETC. 

W HEN he boards a car with a girl a lad should 
grasp her arm just above the elbow and give her 
a little(push as she mounts the steps. He leaves the 
car first and offers her his hand as she alights. Only 
when he is acting as her escort is it incumbent upon 
him to pay her fare. 

Children should never sit while older people are 
standing and they should never push their way 
roughly through a crowded car. Girls by virtue 
of their sex have certain privileges which are de- 


64 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


nied their brothers but these should not be abused 
nor taken as a matter of course. As rude as the 
boy who fails to offer his seat is the girl who ac- 
cepts such an attention without a smile or a word of 
thanks. 

For the sake of good manners as well as for many 
other reasons it is to be deplored that modern life 
moves at such terrific speed. One has to have room 
in which to be polite and the most courteous people 
find themselves helpless when they are thrown into a 
struggling mass of human beings each one trying to 
elbow his neighbor out of the way. 


ON THE TRAIN 

/^\NLY under dire necessity should small children 
ever be made to undergo the torment of a long 
railroad journey, but when it is unavoidable the 
mother should manage the little expedition in such a 
way as to work a minimum amount of hardship on 
the youngsters and on the other travelers. A gen- 
erous freedom of movement should be permitted them 
but they should not be allowed to race up and down 
the aisles, to climb over the laps of the other passen- 
gers, to eat promiscuously all over the car or to go for 
water every other minute. Travelers are indulgent 
only within reasonable limits. 

Personal comments are as rude as personal atten- 
tions are vexatious. There is an awful fascination 


In Public 


65 


about a bald head rising over the seat in front and 
nothing but an invincible coat of good breeding will 
keep a child from remarking upon it. 

It is foolish to make a bug-a-boo of every stranger. 
Childhood is its own best protection and if it is not 
sufficient nothing will be. If the train is so crowded 
that the youngster has to share a seat which is occu- 
pied by someone else he should first ask, “ Is this place 
taken?” or, “May I sit here?” Empty seats should 
not be burdened with hats, wraps, and satchels; and 
coats should be hung so that they will not be in the 
way of the people sitting in front or those behind. 
Windows should not be lowered or raised without 
the consent of those in the immediate neighbor- 
hood. 

The porter should not be ordered about sharply 
and any service that is worth a tip is worth a “Thank 
you.” 

SHOPPING 

I F A lad goes into a shop with his mother or sister he 
should open the door for her to enter, lifting his 
hat as he does so and replacing it after they are inside. 

The man or woman behind the counter usually 
meets courtesy with courtesy but sometimes he or 
she is cross without apparent cause. This is often 
because the day has been an especially hard one or 
because the previous customer was more than or- 
dinarily trying; but whatever the reason for it, lack 
of politeness on the part of one person is no excuse for 


66 Young Folks* Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


a similar failure on the part of another, and children 
should be taught to appreciate the difficulties of the 
shopkeeper’s position, and to alleviate rather than to 
increase them. 

Delicate fabrics should not be handled and nothing 
should be fingered except with a view to purchase. 
Mothers and children should not enter into a detailed 
discussion of their reasons for and against buying a 
certain article. They waste the time of the sales- 
person, and many a mother has allowed herself to 
be mortified into buying something which she knew 
she could not afford by her son’s or daughter’s in- 
sistence that he or she must have it. It is an old 
device and if the child finds that it “works” he will 
use it every time he gets a chance. 


CHAPERONAGE 



TIE American mother generally acts on the as- 


sumption that her child can be trusted without 
having to be watched. The amount of formal chap- 
eronage varies in different places, for the needs of 
small towns and large are not the same. The mother 
should conform to the local practice unless she finds 
it harmful. Boys are usually held to be not so much 
in need of this sort of thing as their sisters but it is a 
mistake to send them out on larks and frolics without 
a man of broad sympathy and understanding to look 
after them. The chaperon should always have the 


In Public 


67 


power of a dictator but it should never be necessary 
to use it like a dictator. 

THEATRES, CONCERTS, ETC. 

ARRIVAL at places of amusement should be a 
few minutes before the performance actually 
begins. People who have come to enjoy the evening 
and have paid their money to do so are justly indig- 
nant when their ears are assailed by the noise of 
shuffling feet and loud whisperings and their view is 
obstructed by late comers passing in front of them 
to get to their places. 

Upon entering the theatre the escort should go 
first, giving his tickets to the gate-keeper and his cou- 
pons to the usher. Then he should follow the ladies 
down the aisle to their seats, taking the one on the 
outside for himself. Heavy wraps should be removed 
in the lobby or in the back of the theatre but a single 
coat may be taken off at the seat and thrown over the 
back of the chair or folded and placed underneath 
with the hat. A girl should remove her hat before 
the performance begins. 

Once in place one should not get up unless there is 
a good reason for it. It is very troublesome to those 
who have to rise to allow passage, and if it is done at 
all it should be with apologies. The person leaving 
should face the stage as he passes out. 

One may smile a greeting to friends in a distant 
part of the theatre but one should not communicate 


68 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


with them by means of signs or signals. Turning 
around to stare at the other people who are present 
is not in keeping with any ideal of good breeding. 

Rattling of programmes, audible talking, applause 
by whistling or stamping the feet on the floor are all 
extremely rude. Conversation may be carried on 
between acts or numbers but it should always be in a 
low tone. Applause may be hearty but should never 
be rough or noisy. 

MOTION PICTURES 

T HERE is no essential difference in the conduct to 
be observed at a motion-picture show and any 
other place of amusement. Where the performance 
is continuous it is necessary to go blundering through 
the dark to find a seat. This can be made less awk- 
ward if the first arrivals take the seats in the centre of 
the house leaving those nearest the aisle vacant. 

People are judged, and with a large degree of fair- 
ness, by the books they read, the friends they culti- 
vate, the music they enjoy, and the theatres they 
attend; and no mother has a right to send her child 
to a place where his taste will be degraded, or where 
she herself would be ashamed to be seen. 

No force in America is more powerful in forming 
the manner of the young people — and manner is 
more important than manners — than the motion 
picture show. There are as many incipient Mary 
Pickfords as there are curly-haired girls and nearly 


In Public 


69 


every boy is hesitating whether to become successor 
to Charlie Chaplin, Douglas Fairbanks, or William 
S. Hart. The pictures are with us whether we wish 
it or not. It rests with the mothers to say whether 
they are to be for better or for worse. 

CHURCH 

T3 EVERENCE, which is politeness toward God, 
can consistently find expression in conduct only 
when it springs from a deep respect for sacred things. 
In this, as in every thing else, there is no use trying 
to divorce morals and manners. It cannot be done 
without disastrous results and no civilization except 
a decadent one will attempt it, for the force which 
makes society wholesome is inseparably bound up 
with that which makes it sweet. 

There are cathedrals in which the windows “ cast- 
ing a dim, religious light,” the great organ pealing 
forth celestial music, the spacious aisles arched by 
majestic roofs, and the whole atmosphere of twilight 
solemnity induce a feeling of adoration and awe; 
but most American children go to quaint chapels 
and churches which through intimate association 
have grown as familiar as their homes or their schools. 
It is in these that true reverence is put to the test and 
no child whose spiritual courtesy is on the right found- 
ation will ever desecrate through word or act a build- 
ing consecrated to worship whether it be made of 
canvas, wood, brick, or marble. 


70 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Not only should he be taught to venerate the doc- 
trines of his own church but he should also be taught 
to respect those of other religions. Alien creeds may 
seem very strange, perhaps very foolish, but they 
are as dear to their believers as those of the oldest 
churches among us are to their most devout members; 
and when all is said and done the eternal truths are 
much the same under whatever guise they come. 
The veriest infidel, if he has even the slightest claim 
to the word gentleman, does not in any way wound 
the sensibilities of those who do believe in the efficacy 
of religion and the power of prayer. 

The two greatest outward virtues of a church-goer 
are silence and punctuality. The church should be 
approached quietly. Noise in the yard or vestibule 
disturbs those who come early for a few moments of 
meditation and prayer before the regular service 
begins; and giggling, tittering, talking, and other mis- 
behavior makes those who came to worship wish 
they had stayed away. Until he has learned pro- 
perly to conduct himself a child had better stay at 
home. 

Rarely is there a good excuse for tardiness, but 
when it is unavoidable the late-comer should sink 
into a pew near the entrance instead of walking down 
the length of the aisle after the service has begun. 

Children should not go to church in unchaperoned 
crowds nor should they sit where there are no grown 
people to look after them. The mere proximity of 
the dignity of middle age does away with many of the 


In Public 


71 


thoughtless breaches of good behavior into which 
the youngsters fall when left to themselves. It is 
usually a sign of spiritual well-being when a family 
attends religious services together. 

If a lad accompanies his mother and sisters to 
church when his father is not along he should conduct 
them to their places. Removing his hat in the vesti- 
bule, not half way down the aisle, he follows the 
ladies as the usher leads them to their pew. If there 
is a gateway he holds it aside for them and after they 
are seated takes the place next to the aisle for himself. 
When the service is ended he steps into the aisle, 
holds the gate while they pass out and follows them 
as they leave the auditorium. A girl should give 
precedence to women and old men. 

Many a time a mother carries a very small child 
to church with her because she knows that he is better 
off there than he would be at home in the hands of 
servants. If he should become so restive as to dis- 
turb the other members of the congregation she 
should rise and leave quietly. Often he cries because 
he is hungry or imagines that he is. In small 
churches where the congregation is more or less like 
a large family the mother may carry something for 
him to eat, but if it is something of which he is very 
fond she may be sure that he will be hungry as soon 
as they have entered the door while if it is plain 
crackers or bread and butter he will not call for it 
until he really needs it. 

The members of a church should make visitors feel 


72 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


at home. There are not many things which a child 
can do, but moving aside to make room in the pew, 
passing a hymn book or a fan, or whispering the 
number of a song will make the stranger’s memory 
of his visit a happy one. 

Except when the service is embarrassingly hard to 
follow a visitor should conform to the practice of the 
congregation, standing when they stand, kneeling 
when they kneel, and singing when they sing. 


CHAPTER IX 


SCHOOL 

“Ah ! that thou couldst know thy joy 
Ere it passes .” 

THE FIRST DAYS 

I T IS a proud day for the mother and father when 
Johnny first starts to school but to the youngster 
himself it is often a time of bitter disillusionment 
for he who has been absolute monarch in his own 
home finds that no one outside his family will tolerate 
his petty despotism. His parents can save him many 
a doleful moment by letting him know, almost from 
the time that he is old enough to know anything, that, 
after all, he is only a small thread in a great social 
fabric and that his rights and privileges depend upon 
the way they affect other people; and the child who 
has learned how to live unselfishly with his brothers 
and sisters is the one who will be happiest when he 
finds himself thrown out into the world to make his 
way among other children. 

THE NEW PUPIL 

I T IS inexcusable for those who are already estab- 
lished in a school to make the advent of a new 
pupil the occasion for rude sport at his expense. 
73 


74 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Staring him out of countenance, giggling if his accent 
or grammar are out of the ordinary, making co- 
vert and not altogether hidden remarks about his 
appearance and manner, playing practical jokes upon 
him, and treating him in every way as if he were 
an intruder make the ordeal — for it is truly this to 
come face to face with a dozen or two strangers — a 
severe one. With very few adaptations the manners 
of the drawing room are those for the schoolroom 
and an old pupil should feel almost the same amount 
of responsibility toward a new one that he does 
toward a guest in his home. 


THE TEACHER 

CINCE she is the mother's substitute the teacher 
^ should be given the respect due a mother. Some- 
times she does not deserve it. There are unworthy 
mothers — but a few isolated examples are not enough 
to destroy faith in mothers — or in teachers. The 
profession, with one exception the noblest in the 
world, commands respect when the individual does 
not; and when a child “talks back” to his instructor, 
snaps his fingers in her face, clears his throat noisily 
or rudely draws her attention to himself in any other 
way he shows that somewhere — there are exceptions 
to this, of course — his mother has been derelict in her 
duty. When trouble arises, as it does occasionally 
even in the best-regulated families, the matter should 


School 


75 


be quietly threshed out and disposed of by the older 
people. 

For the most part it is on the pages of fiction that 
the child who knows a great deal more than anybody 
else and is constantly demonstrating his superiority 
over his parents and teachers and the world in gen- 
eral develops into a man whom every one, including 
the instructors who predicted that he would hang, 
is delighted to honor. History has a different story 
to tell, and most men and women are grateful to those 
who helped them balance their unsteady feet on the 
first rounds of the long ladder of learning, and, looking 
back upon the days when they pored over the three 
R’s and the rest of the curriculum, wonder not that 
their preceptors were so harsh but that they were so 
patient. Genius, it is true, knows no law but its 
own and brooks no restraint, but the problem of 
educating children in the art of living must concern 
itself with the million rather than with the one. 
Genius carves its own way. The average must be 
taught. 


IN THE SCHOOLROOM 

D IRT, dust, and a general air of untidiness have a 
very dispiriting effect on those who have to 
live in the midst of it, and each child should keep his 
desk and the floor around it neat and clean. It is 
very tiresome to have to sit in the same place for an 
hour or two, but lounging over the desk or sitting 


76 Young Folks’ Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


with the feet sprawled into the aisle will not help 
matters. 

The various monitors should perform their work 
efficiently and quietly. Papers should be collected 
or distributed accurately and quickly. Pens, pen- 
cils, knives, pointers, etc., should be presented with 
the blunt end outward. Playing at the drinking 
fountain, gnawing pens or pencils, chewing up bits 
of paper, or sticking wads of gum under the desk 
to be drawn out and chewed again are not only ill- 
bred but dangerously unsanitary. 

When he stands to recite, a child should hold him- 
self erect and speak distinctly. The other pupils 
should give him the same attentive regard they would 
like to have if they were in his place. No hands 
should be raised until he has finished talking. Jeer- 
ing at a wrong answer is a brutal form of discourtesy 
but if the occasion arises for a hearty laugh in which 
everyone can join, both teacher and pupils are better 
off for having indulged it. 

The schoolroom is a little world in itself, one that 
does not countenance telling tales of what happens 
there; but the standard of moral rectitude and 
courtesy is as strict as that which obtains in the great 
world outside. Cheating during examinations or 
recitations cannot be too severely condemned. 
There are many faults which can be excused on the 
basis of youthful folly or thoughtlessness but dis- 
honor is not one of them; and the child who does 
not look with horror on such a practice is beginning 


School 


77 


the race of life with a terrible handicap. Heaven 
pity him. The world will not. 

ON THE PLAYGROUND 

jV/TORE than through his books or his teacher a 
***- child is educated through his friends. At school 
he selects his own playmates, and the standard by 
which he measures them is the one he has learned at 
home, for he has no other. 

There should be supervision of playground activ- 
ities but it should be managed in such a way as to 
throw the greater part of the responsibility on the 
shoulders of the pupils themselves. Big boys are 
better than teachers or any other “duly constituted 
authorities” to stop the bullying of small ones, and 
every child should feel that he has a part in making 
the school yard a democratic playground, safe and 
pleasant for everybody. 

No one except a few morbidly sensitive and more or 
less inhuman beings object to children laughing at 
recess but no one likes to see them degenerate into a 
shrieking disorderly mob. 

There is a deplorable lack of good breeding in the 
consumption of lunches on the school grounds. 
Mothers would be amazed to hear their well-fed and 
apparently well-brought-up daughters begging for 
something to eat with almost as much pathos as if 
they were starving refugees from a battle-field and 
really needed it. Besides this, many children mark 


78 Young Folks ’ Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


their trail on the campus with banana peelings, 
cracker boxes, bits of paper and other unsightly- 
debris. All of this should go into the garbage can. 

BOARDING SCHOOL 

I F A child does not learn to be loyal to the school in 
which he lives there is something radically wrong 
with it — or with him. Once in a while he is un- 
happy because, unused to the amenities of polite 
society at the table and elsewhere, he seems very- 
strange to his companions who by their attitude make 
him feel all the more like an outsider. The rudeness 
in a case of this kind is all on the part of those who 
make fun of the child. He does not know any better. 
They do, and they should also know better than to 
laugh at the newcomer (most children grow out of 
these idiosyncrasies after a while), and it may be 
that underneath his uncouth exterior the little fellow 
is pure gold. Many of our greatest men — Daniel 
Webster among them — were boys of this kind. 


CHAPTER X 


CARDS 

“Striking manners are bad manners 

VISITING CARDS 

F ORMERLY a child had no visiting card and 
even a debutante during her first season had 
only one on which her mother's name also 
appeared, but to-day every school girl has her own 
card which she uses in many ways. It bears her full 
name without title, as: 


Alice Trowbridge Sampson 


79 


8o Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Initials never appear on a visiting card but a lad 
may have the abbreviation Jr. after his name. His 
card is slightly smaller than that of his sister. Fash- 
ions in script, size, and style vary from year to year 
and the only stable rule that can be given is to 
go to a good engraver. The visiting card is the 
personal representative of the one whose name it 
bears and cheap workmanship gives the impression 
of a cheap person back of the card. 

OTHER CARDS 

S ENDING a card instead of a gift at Christmas 
and on other holiday occasions is gaining in favor. 
Children may fall in line as soon as they are old 
enough to select their own designs. 

A child never sends a formal card of sympathy or 
congratulation but in cards sent by the family he is 
often included in an impersonal way, as: 


The family of the late 
James McNeil Paulding 
gratefully acknowledges your sympathy 

286 Lee Street . 


CHAPTER XI 


INTRODUCTIONS 

“Few are qualified to shine in company but it is in 
all men's power to be agreeable .” 

PRESENTATIONS 

I T GIVES a child poise and confidence to come 
into contact with well-bred men and women, for 
good manners are as contagious as bad; and if 
the mother does not push him forward and exhibit 
him as if he were a blue-ribbon trick puppy or pony 
it is not likely to develop into boldness. She should 
never present him to a roomful of people at a time 
except when it is unavoidable, and always she 
should introduce him with as much formality and 
courtliness as if he were many years older. A one- 
sided introduction is not enough even for a child, 
and when the mother has said, “This is my son, 
John” or “my daughter, Mary” her duty is only 
half done for the youngster is entitled to know 
whether he is confronting Mrs. Brown or Mrs. 
Green or Mrs. White; and the introduction should 
be somewhat in this fashion: “Mrs. Jones, this is 
my son, Harold. Harold, this is Ellen's mother.” 

8l 


82 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Too often children ignore introductions as some- 
thing entirely superfluous but every child should 
present his new friends to his mother and should 
introduce those of his playmates who are unac- 
quainted. His friends should be presented to his 
mother, not she to them, as: “Mother, this is Harry 
Townshend. He has just moved into the brick 
house on the corner” or “Mother, this is my friend, 
Ned Thomas.” At parties a child who is almost a 
total stranger should not be introduced to all the 
guests at once but only to a sufficient number to set 
him or her at ease. Other presentations follow 
naturally during the course of the entertainment. 
On such occasions the roof introduction may be 
deemed all that is necessary since it is taken for 
granted that whatever guests assemble at the house 
of a friend on a special party invitation are desirable 
to know. It does not, however, do away with the 
awkwardness which comes from not knowing the 
names of those who are present. Street introduc- 
tions are out of place unless the little group walks 
on together or there is great probability that the 
two strangers will be thrown together shortly after- 
ward. 

ACKNOWLEDGING AN INTRODUCTION 

/ T V HE older person should take the initiative in 
* acknowledging an introduction; and while it 
is very cunning for a small child to present his cheek 


I nsrod: unions 


*3 


nr hb ops it&e preterm atcuid be her; x boy would 
never fee gml ry , rr is tbe scrt at rh : rg which Loses its 
mare is 2c agm :t should be she grows rider. 

Since tbe object at in inrnducdcit b to make two 
p e opl e known to each other tbe names ^tcuid be 
prancxEscsd ffrlirrfy and in berctc edcrt shcuid be 
trade to remember then. ftcrie are very sensitive 
m rdrs pant — there is s nferie cattery be Letting cue 
knew t kit bis personal ty b so vivid that it stomps 
ntc enty bb image bet xlso bb came on tbe me vis of 
these be meets — ate. tbe gift of recalling names b a 
i vaLnab*Le business and social asset. Tbe practice of 
j repeating tbe came after an introduction. b a com- 
mendable cce fcrr it gives an opportunity tor octree- 
fee if it bos been misunderstood. 

A obild shcuid always stand to receive an intro- 
daemon even when tbe person introduced b of tbe 
same age and sex as himself* and should murmur 
some route phrase expressing hb joy at tbe cneerng. 
Wben be b introduced to a child of hb own age n 
kb evt home, tbe youngster should gracsoasty extend 
bis band in greeting;* but under most circumstances 
1 tbrs formality is ax observed. 


CHAPTER XII 


CORRESPONDENCE 

“The basis of good manners is self-reliance .” 

STATIONERY 

F OR children under ten the task of writing 
letters can be made a positive joy by the use 
of the charming juvenile stationery with 
fairies or brownies or Kewpies or Mother Goose's 
people or the circus kiddies fairly tumbling over the 
pages. Older children discard this in favor of note 
paper like that used by adults. Plain white with a 
smooth or deckle edge is always in good taste. 
Delicately tinted paper may be used but not that 
with a gilt or colored border. An unobtrusive mono- 
gram is permissible but embossed crests and elab- 
orate ornamentation of any kind are distinctly vul- 
gar. The ink should be either black or blue, never 
violet, green, red, or purple. It is safer to avoid 
the use of perfume altogether but there is no very 
serious objection to a faint fragrance rising from 
a young girl's letter. Sealing wax should never be 
84 


Correspondence 


85 


added when there is mucilage on the flap of the 
envelope. 

POST AND POSTAL CARDS 

T)OST and postal cards are used for brief im- 
-*■ personal messages, as when one is visiting or 
traveling and wishes to send his address to his friends 
or when the card is interesting enough to be sent for 
its own sake. The messages which they bear should 
not begin or conclude with terms of affection and 
should be signed with the initials or with the first 
initial and the surname. They should not be written 
in an illegible scrawl and they should not be made to 
bear a communication long enough for a sheet or two 
of note paper. They should always be dated. 

CORRESPONDENCE CARDS 

C ORRESPONDENCE cards are used when the 
message is too intimate for a post card and too 
short for a letter. They should be selected by the same 
rules which govern the choice of any other stationery. 

PERSONAL LETTERS 

D OTING grandparents, aunts, and uncles expect 
letters from a youngster as soon as he has 
learned to guide a pen, however shakily, across a 
sheet of paper. It is a grave mistake for a mother 
to compose these missives or to criticise them with 
too great severity. The budding author should not 


86 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


be deprived of the joy of creation nor of the satisfac- 
tion which comes from regarding his own handiwork. 

There is no hard and fast rule laying down the 
length of time which should elapse before a letter is 
answered any more than there is a rule stating defin- 
itely how many times during the year one should call 
upon a friend. Under ordinary circumstances a 
letter should be responded to by the end of two 
weeks but if it is two years before the reply is started 
on its way it should not be burdened with apologies. 
Ofyii s' excuse s' accuse. 

A note of thanks for a gift should be dispatched 
within twenty-four hours after it is received except 
at Christmas time when the holiday festivities pre- 
vent, and even then the “thank-you” letters should 
at least be in the mail box by New Year’s day. 
These should be written by the child himself but 
when the gift is from one of his mother’s friends she 
should supplement his note with one of her own, 
which is sent in a separate envelope. 

Most difficult of all letters to write is one expressing 
sympathy to a bereaved friend but when the occasion 
arises the child himself should meet it. These un- 
pleasant duties cannot always be shifted to some one 
else. The letter should not contain anything that 
does not bear directly upon the loss and it should be 
as short as possible successfully to carry its message. 

Bread-and-butter letters, which are written after 
a visit, should be sent as soon as the writer has gotten 
back to his or her home. In addition to their par- 


Correspondence 


87 


ticular function, that of conveying gratitude for hos- 
pitality, they may be made as chatty and as long as 
the writer chooses. 

BUSINESS LETTERS 

qpHE business correspondence of a child is usually 
not very extensive but all children should be 
taught the basic requirements of a business letter, 
brevity, neatness, conciseness, courtesy, and legibility; 
and should be allowed to write simple letters ordering 
things for themselves. The example given below 
shows the general form which they should follow. 

463 Cherry St. y 
Macon , Georgia. 
June 14 , 19 — . 

Burton and Burton , 

9/6 Fifth Ave ., 

New York City , N. Y. 

Gentlemen: 

Please send me the following hooks as advertised in 
your Spring catalogue ; 

Alice in Wonderland $2 . 00 

Grimm's Fairy Tales $ 2.00 

I am inclosing a money order for four ( 4 ) dollars. 

Very truly yours , 

(Miss) 


88 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


If the letter is written by a boy the title in paren- 
theses does not form a part of the signature. 

INVITATIONS 

U NTIL the little fingers have grown skilful enough 
to manage a pen without using more ink in 
blotting than in writing the mother writes all the 
invitations. She may have them engraved but this 
fashion has never won much approval, the formality 
of the social functions with which engraved cards are 
associated being quite out of keeping with most chil- 
dish affairs. The printed blanks very much like the 
stationery of nursery days are procurable at most of 
the shops. They should be selected with reference 
to the kind of party that is to be given. There are 
so many designs that there is hardly an excuse for an 
inappropriate or an unattractive one. The invitation 
written on white paper is always in good taste though 
it is not always as appealing as some of the others. 

Invitations should be sent from ten to fourteen days 
ahead of time if the affair is to be elaborate, but in 
ordinary cases two or three days is sufficient. They 
may be sent by post or they may be delivered by 
messenger or by hand. In the latter case they are 
unsealed. 

An invitation should always be accepted in kind, 
that is, by word of mouth if it is given verbally or 
over the telephone, by formal note if it is given that 
way. And even when a child has seen the sender of 


Correspondence 


89 


an invitation and has thanked him for it and accepted 
or refused in person it does not relieve him of the 
duty of sending a written answer. An invitation 
should be accepted or declined unconditionally. 
It is not permissible to say, “If I do not do such a 
thing I will come to your party on Wednesday.” 
The present tense should always be used, not “will 
accept” but “accepts” for the act of accepting lies 
in the writing of the answer. 

If the date and hour for the entertainment are re- 
peated it will prevent embarrassing mistakes. Visit- 
ing cards are not used by well-bred people to accept 
or decline invitations; and the social activities of a 
child should not be so numerous as to make such a 
time-saving device necessary. Promptness in reply- 
ing is so obvious a duty that many people consider 
the words, Repondez s'll vous plait (R. S. V . P.), or 
Please Reply , discourteous and have discontinued 
their use. 

An invitation for a week-end or several days should 
state the length of time the guest is expected to pro- 
long his or her visit and should give some idea of what 
kind of entertainment is in store so that suitable ap- 
parel may be brought. It should contain assurances 
that the train will be met, and if there are several 
trains to choose from, a schedule should be inclosed 
along with a suggestion as to the best one to take. 

Special cases call for special attention, and since 
each party is a problem in itself the following exam- 
ples are offered not as models but as suggestions. 


90 Young Folks ’ Fncyclopcedia of Etiquette 


Informal Party Invitation Addressed to a Mother 

(a) 


Bear Mrs. Johnson , 

I am having a few of the children around on Monday 
afternoon to help celebrate Sarah's birthday. Won't 
you let Thelma come about four o'clock ? 

V ery cordially yours , 

Friday , 19 — 


(b) 

Bear Mrs. Hopkins , 

I shall be delighted to send Thelma to you on Monday 
afternoon and Thelma is pleased almost beyond words. 
Wishing for Sarah many happy returns of the day and 
many happy birthdays in the years to come , I am 
V ery sincerely yours , 

Saturday , 19 — . 


2 

Informal Party Invitation Addressed to a Child 

(a) 

Bear Thelma , 

We are having a little party at four o'clock next 
Monday afternoon to celebrate Sarah's birthday. 
W on't you ask your mother to let your come ? 

Sincerely yours , 

Friday , 19 — 


Correspondence 


9i 


(b) 

Bear Sarah , 

Thelma says that she wishes she were able to write so 
that she could tell you herself how much she is looking 
forward to your party on Monday afternoon . She and 
I both hope for you the happiest of happy birthdays. 

Sincerely yours , 

Saturday , 19 — . 


3 

Formal Invitation to a Dance 


(a) 


Miss Mary Alice Brown 
requests the pleasure of your company 
on Wednesday evening, February the tenth 
at eight o'clock. 

Dancing 55 Lee Street . 


(b) 

Miss Lillian Simons accepts with pleasure your kind 
invitation for Wednesday evening, February the tenth at 
eight o'clock. 

452 West Franklin Avenue, 

February 5, 19 — . 


92 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


4 

Formal Invitation to a Dance 

(a) 

Fear Mary , 

Mother is giving a little dance for me on Wednesday 
evening and I want so much for you to come . Bessie's 
cousin , Mildred , wAo visited her last summer , w to 
CoTftd’ <3/ o'clock. 

Cordially your friend, 

Ferndale, 

Friday ii, ip — . 

(b) 

Dear Agnes, 

I shall be delighted to come to your dance on Wednes- 
day evening at eight o'clock. I am glad that Mildred 
is to be there. I remember what good times we had to- 
gether last year. 

Sincerely, 

The Pines, 

Monday 14, 19 — . 


5 

Invitation to a Picnic 


(a) 

Dear Jim, 

I hope you have nothing planned for Friday afternoon 
for we are going to have a picnic at Blackshear s Ferry. 


Correspondence 


93 


We shall meet here on our lawn at three o'clock 
and then ride out to the Ferry in trucks. Mother and 
some of the girls are going along , and Dr. Jackson , 
Mother says , to keep us from drowning. Bring your 
bathing suit and come along. Don't let rain stop you. 

Yours , 

(b) 

Dear Bill , 

The picnic idea is great and I'll be on hand and on time. 
Yours, 

June 21 y 19 — . 

6 

Invitation for a Week-end 

(a) 

Dear Frances , 

Can't you come down and spend next week-end with 
us ? There is a train leaving the Terminal Station at 
three o'clock. It gets here at foury in plenty of time for 
you to clean up a bit and get ready for a moonlight picnic 
down at Well Springs. On Saturday morning we will 
sleep and in the afternoon we'll have a little party here. 
There is to be a famous preacher at the Cathedral Sun- 
day and Mother says we must hear him. In the after- 
noon we'll ride out to Bronwood. And we can think of 
lots of other things to do after you get here. 

Sincerely your friend , 

Rosedaley 
Tuesday 1 1 , 19 — • 


94 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


(b) 

Fear Annie y 

Mother is almost as glad as I am that you have asked 
me to come down for the week-end. W e have not been 
out of the city this summer and are all so tired of it. 
Til come on the four o'clock train as you suggested , and 
then yo 9 ho y ho ! for a good time. 

Sincerely , 

50 N. 116 St.y 
Friday , /y, 19 — . 

A note postponing or recalling an invitation should 
state why it is necessary and should express genuine 
regret that it should be so. 

Fear Frances , 

Mother has just been called to New York to help Father 
settle some business affairs and we cannot have the party 
on Tuesday . Perhaps before longy and ohy I do hope it y 
we shall be able to carry out our plans. 

Sincerely yours , 

Riverleay 
Saturday y 19 — . 


ENVELOPES 

A BOVE all things the address on an envelope 
^ ^ should be neat and legible. A man's name is 
always preceded by a title, Mr., Rev., Capt ., etc., 


Correspondence 


95 


except when Esq. is written after it. In such a case 
the name stands thus: 


John H. Brandon , Esq. 


A small boy's name is sometimes preceded by Master 
instead of Mr. and quite often the name has the ab- 
breviation Jr. following it. A girl’s name or a 
woman’s name is always preceded by Miss or Mrs., 
as the case may be, but never by Mrs. Dr., Mrs. 
Rev., etc. A woman does not assume her husband’s 
titles. 


SPELLING 



OT every one is endowed with the gift of writing 


^ ^ a beautiful hand but everyone can with patience 
and perseverance learn to spell correctly and to com- 
pose clearly. Lord Chesterfield lays great stress upon 
the value of correct spelling and in writing to his son 
says, “It is so absolutely necessary for a man of letters, 
or a gentleman, that one false spelling may fix ridicule 
upon him for the rest of his life; and I know one man 
of quality who never recovered the ridicule of having 
spelled wholesome without the w .” 

Every child should be taught to consult, and how 
to consult, the final court of appeal in case of doubt — 
the dictionary. 


CHAPTER XIII 


FUNERALS 

“Yet can I not persuade me thou art dead . . . 

Oh! no, for something in thy face did shine 
Above mortalitie that shew d thou wast divine .” 

THE HOUSE OF SORROW 

U PON the death of a child the shades are low- 
ered, the bell is muffled, and, if the household 
affords it, a carefully instructed servant in 
plain black livery is stationed at the front door to 
receive messages, admit callers, and to make himself 
or herself generally useful in preserving order and 
decorum. In place of the heavy crape which is us- 
ually fastened to the door knob it is more fitting to 
use a few white flowers or a spray of lilacs looped with;, 
white ribbon streamers. 

The interior of the house should not be decorated 
with pot plants or palms hired from the florist and the 
whole sad affair should be conducted with the utmost 
simplicity. 

THE FUNERAL SERVICE 

A MOTHER may ask a relative or friend to look 
after visitors and a father may ask some one else 
to take care of the details of the funeral which will, 
96 


Funerals 


97 


of course, be carried out in accordance with the re- 
ligious faith of the parents and the instructions of 
the undertaker. 

A brief notice of the death and the time and place 
of the funeral and interment inserted in the paper 
is sufficient to announce the bereavement to friends. 
The words, Private Funeral or Please omit flowers may 
be added but it is never permissible to publish ex- 
pressions of grief and sympathy, be they ever so 
beautifully worded. This does not apply to resolu- 
tions which may be offered to the parents by business, 
fraternal, or other organizations. These, because 
they are of a more or less public nature, may be 
printed. More and more the tendency is growing 
toward private and severely simple funerals, and 
relics of barbaric days, such as splendid display of 
flowers or music, are not in good taste. 

Pall bearers act as honorary escort to the body of 
the deceased. They are rarely asked to serve at a 
house funeral but at the church six or eight friends 
of the dead may be asked to walk before the casket, 
or friends of the parents may be asked to act in this 
capacity or to bear the casket itself. The mother 
and father, if the mother has her grief sufficiently 
under control to allow her to be present, walk arm in 
arm after the coffin, their surviving children, follow- 
ing in pairs, the eldest in the lead. 

Only intimate friends ever attend the funeral of a 
child. Guests should not wear gaily colored gar- 
ments, and wraps should not be removed, either at 


98 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


the home or the church. If it is uncomfortably 
warm a coat may be taken off and thrown over the 
arm. Every one rises as the funeral cortege enters 
and again as it passes out. When the service is ended 
friends should disperse quietly to their homes. Only 
those nearest and dearest to the bereaved have the 
right to remain to say good-bye. 

CONDOLENCE 

M ANY people prefer to express their sympathy 
with flowers. These should not be wrought 
into formal wreaths or showy patterns, and for the 
funeral of a child cut flowers, white or faintly colored, 
are most appropriate. A note of condolence or a 
pencilled word of sympathy on a card are in most 
cases to be preferred to a call. This last is apt to be 
in the nature of an intrusion even when the caller 
has the best intentions in the world. (See page 80). 
All expressions of sympathy should be acknowledged 
but this may be deferred until the bereaved have in 
a measure recovered from their sorrow. (See page 
86 .) 


MOURNING 

C HILDREN should not be brought into contact 
with death and violent sorrow any more than is 
necessary. The waiting years that stand beyond 
the gates of childhood have trials enough in store 


Funerals 


99 


for them. A grief-stricken mother naturally clings 
to the garments of mourning but if she has other 
children she should deny herself the solace which 
comes from wearing them. The constant presence of 
black has too depressing an effect on young people. 
The conventional period of mourning for a mother 
who has lost her child, though this is something she 
can best settle with her own heart and conscience, is 
two years, black for the first, gray, white, and laven- 
der for the second. Full social duties are not re- 
sumed until she has again begun wearing colors. 

A father may signify his mourning by a black band 
around his sleeve, a custom which like many another, 
seems to be gaining in popularity the more the 
authorities rail against it. 

No child under sixteen should ever wear mourning 
except pure white, and no child should ever use black- 
bordered stationery. 


CHAPTER XIV 


RIDING AND DRIVING 

“Sing, ridings a joy! For me, I ride.” 

AUTOMOBILING 

T HE etiquette of driving consists of doing what- 
ever makes the highway safe for everybody; 
and no child should ever be allowed to try 
to manage an automobile until he is capable of hand- 
ling it and himself in a crisis. A good driver always 
acts on the assumption that there is another car 
around the corner or over the curve. In nine cases 
out of ten it is not there but it is the tenth that 
counts, and a car running smoothly with a steady 
hand at the wheel and a clear head directing it is 
worth all the emergency brakes in the world. A 
courteous driver takes no more of the road than he 
needs, gives warning when he is coming by sounding 
his horn, when he is going to turn by holding out his 
hand, waits until the gates are up before trying to 
make a railroad crossing, and takes no chances in 
racing across the street ahead of a trolley car or 
motor truck. He never sounds his horn for its own 
sake and he does not honk it in front of a door as a 


IOO 


Riding and Driving 


IOI 


signal to a friend. This is a lazy and discourteous 
practice which disturbs the neighbors and insults 
the person whom it summons. The only two reasons 
it has for existing are both poor ones. It is conven- 
ient and the driver is in a hurry. Life is short, but 
it is lived only once and there is always time to live 
it nicely. 

In America the rule of the road is to keep to the 
right but in England and many other places that of 
keeping to the left obtains. If the driver wishes to 
pass a car on the road he should sound his horn and, 
when the other driver has drawn his machine to one 
side, pass it with a courteous bow of thanks. Break- 
neck speed and racing with unknown machines is 
foolish as well as ill-mannered. 

A lad should help his mother and sisters into an 
automobile unless the machine is constructed so that 
he will have to crawl over them to get to his place. 
In that case he should seat himself first and allow 
them to get in unassisted or with the help of the 
chauffeur. 

Long motor trips should be carefully planned in 
advance and if guests are to be included the part of 
the expenses which they are to bear should be dis- 
tinctly understood beforehand. Children who are 
in danger of being homesick should not be carried 
off on rides which are to last several days. There are 
usually enough hardships to be met with along the 
road without internal trouble of this kind. 

There is practically no difference between the eti- 


102 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


quette of riding in an automobile and in a carriage 
except that in the latter case the feelings of the 
horse have to be considered. The seats of honor are 
those which face the front and should therefore be 
given to older people, or if only children are riding, 
to girls. 


BICYCLING 


W HEN bicycling went out of fashion most people 
stopped riding, but perhaps some day even 
with automobiles and aeroplanes galore, it will come 
again into its own. Meanwhile it belongs especially 
to boys and girls. There are two rules which, ob- 
served, will save many a heartache and doctor bill. 
Stay off the sidewalk. Do not catch hold of the rear 
end of vehicles and swing on while they propel you 


along. 


RIDING 


HE most conservative communities have real- 



-*• ized that the better part of modesty is safety, 
and nearly everywhere little girls wear boots and 
breeches when they ride instead of the clumsy skirts 
of a generation ago. The caprice of fashion prevents 
a detailed description of a correct riding habit but 
one striking because of color or design is never in 
good taste. 

Before mounting, a rider should always inspect the 


Riding and Driving 


103 


girths, and then, taking the reins in his left hand, the 
crop in his right, and placing his left foot in the 
stirrup and his right hand on the pommel of his saddle, 
should spring into place and thrust his right foot in 
the other stirrup. Once seated the old rule was, 

Keep up your head and your heart. 

Your hands and your heels keep down; 

Press your knees close to your horse’s sides 
And your elbows close to your own, 

but a better rule than this is to sit naturally so as to 
be able to follow the rhythmic motions of the animal. 
A good rider is one with his horse. 

Not until he has grown into a strong and valiant 
lad should a boy attempt to help his sister to mount 
in any way except by leading her horse to a stand and 
holding the reins while she clambers up as best she 
can. When he grows older he may place his hand 
as a step for her left foot, raising it gradually until 
she has gained her saddle. Always he should dis- 
mount first; and he may either lead the horse of his 
companion back to the stand or he may place himself 
so that she can put one hand on his shoulder and. 
the other in his right hand as she leaps down from 
her perch. 


CHAPTER XV 

SPORTS AND SPORTSMANSHIP 

“If the sportive activity allowed to boys does not 
prevent them from growing up into gentlemen ; why 
should a like sportive activity allowed to girls pre- 
vent them from growing up into ladies ?” 

GAMES 

D ANGER lurks in the idle hour. The time 
when a child is in school or at work will 
take care of itself but wise guidance is needed 
when time comes to play. The most valuable, be- 
cause the most universal and the most social, form of 
recreation for young people is playing games. Aside 
from the sturdy qualities of character which the 
right sorts of games cultivate, nothing so effectively 
teaches the little amenities of life, nothing so thor- 
oughly inculcates the principles of living and working 
together, nothing gives so complete a knowledge of 
what constitutes good citizenship. On the play- 
ground the timid child finds confidence, the sluggish 
child alertness, the domineering child restraint, and 
all children strength of body, quickness of mind, and 
beauty of soul. 


104 


Sports and Sportsmanship 105 


Children should not be encouraged to play games 
which depend on chance but rather those in which 
the victor wins by his own prowess and skill. The 
others tend to make him bow down before the wicked 
little god of luck, than whom none is more treacher- 
ous. When, as at a party, a prize is offered, its in- 
trinsic value should be small and the games should be 
played for their own sake rather than for the reward. 

It was not by accident that the peoples of earliest 
times that were most skilful in games builded the 
greatest civilizations, and it is not by accident that 
to-day the nations which command the highest re- 
spect are those which train their youth on the 
football field and the baseball diamond as well as in 
the schoolroom and the workshop. It was on Mt. 
Olympus that the Greeks developed most of the 
qualities that made their country the glory of the 
ancient world, and it is worth remembering that the 
guerdon for which they struggled was a branch of 
wild olive. Only that. No wonder they were a race 
of giants. 

Nearly all games have a code of rules which must 
be strictly followed, and in these the specialized eti- 
quette for each one is bound up. Fair play usually 
begets courteous play, and there cannot be courteous 
play unless there is fair play. Good sportsmanship 
means winning without boasting, losing without 
explaining how it happened, being cheated without 
loss of temper, and seeing an easy way to seize an 
unfair advantage and passing it by. 


io6 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Back in the good old days it was considered un- 
ladylike to make any demonstration at a track meet 
or a ball game but it is a very cold-blooded young lady 
indeed who can watch the home team dashing in to 
victory without a shout of triumph or see the same 
team struggling with defeat and not give a cry of 
encouragement. There are limits, however, even in 
these degenerate days, and children should never 
shriek derision in the faces of the losers or let them- 
selves become boisterous in their approval or disap- 
proval. In the special yells for interscholastic ath- 
letic events and others there should be no profane 
or vulgar words, and the playground vocabulary 
should not be one that will taint the every-day voca- 
bulary when the two merge into one. Courtesy 
demands that a yell be given the visiting team be- 
fore and after the game whether they are the victors 
or losers. 

Besides games there are many other kinds of 
clean, healthful, active outdoor sport in some form 
of which every child should have an opportunity to 
engage. 

BATHING 

TT IS a mistake to think that the garments of 
A modesty can be thrown aside with impunity when 
one steps into a bathing suit, and a girl can no more 
afford to dress imprudently at the swimmimg pool 
or on the beach than she can in the ball-room or on 
the street. 


Sports and Sportsmanship 


107 


Common sense dictates that a bathing suit be not 
so clumsy as to impede the wearer's movements in the 
water nor so scant as to make her the object of special 
attention. A very small child may go in swimming 
without skirts or stockings but her sister of twelve or 
fourteen has not the same privilege. 

Boys and very athletic girls should not play 
roughly nor frighten those who do not know how to 
swim. Those who are at home in the water should 
spend a part of their time helping those who are less 
fortunate. 

Parents should be careful about the places where 
they allow their children to bathe. The “or swim- 
min’ hole" is usually safe enough, but improperly 
drained indoor pools and natatoriums are alive with 
typhoid and other deadly germs. 

BOATING 

TT IS best to take no chances, and a child should 
not try to row a boat before he has learned to 
swim, nor should he be allowed on a lake or river with 
some one else unless he can pull himself out in case 
of an upset or is with some one who can do it for him. 

Overturning canoes is sport when all the players 
have on bathing suits and know how to swim well. 
Under other circumstances it is only a person defi- 
cient in some of his faculties who rocks a boat or does 
anything else which is likely to cause an accident. It 
is no easy matter to get out of deep water when one 


io8 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


is fully dressed, and as for getting some one else out, 
it is only an expert who can do it. 


HUNTING 


O CHILD should be given a rifle or gun until he 
is taught that mother birds, bluebirds, mock- 
ing birds, and other songbirds are not game for the 
hunter. A good hunter never shoots at anything 
without knowing what it is and he never kills any- 
thing that he has no use for or for the sake of slaugh- 


ter. 


FISHING 


N ENTHUSIASTIC fisherman recently said 



^ that he thought happiness should be spelled 
f-i-s-h-i-n-g. At any rate there is a great deal of 
sport to be gotten out of a day spent angling. The 
by-products, even when no fish are caught, make the 
trip worth while. The lure of adventure, the charm 
of uncertainty, the joy of being out of doors, the thrill 
of actually catching something are more than enough 
to balance the dozens of petty annoyances (mosqui- 
toes and bramble bushes, for instance) which are met 
along the way. And even these furnish good disci- 
pline for the disposition. 

The fish should be given at least a fighting chance. 
There is not half the excitement in seining for them 
that there is in going after them with hook, line, and 


Sports and Sportsmanship 


109 


sinker; and clean sportsmanship does not counte- 
nance such practices as dynamiting pools for fish or 
killing them wholesale in any other way. 

HIKING 

A MERRY band of youngsters hiking down a 
country road early in the morning to cook 
breakfast beside some half-hidden spring is a group 
of people to be envied. There are no rules for them 
to follow beyond dressing comfortably and warmly, 
wearing low-heeled walking shoes, carrying plenty to 
eat, and never doing anything which will make them 
unwelcome travellers along the same highway. 

SCOUTS 

T HROUGH membership in the Boy Scouts a lad 
learns not only the finest kind of courtesy, that 
which comes from a manly spirit, but he also learns 
the foundation principles of clean sportsmanship, not 
only in his ordinary pursuits and games but in the 
greatest game of them all, the game of Life. What 
the Boy Scouts do for the lad the Girl Scouts do for 
his sister; and few agencies working for the mental, 
moral, and physical well-being of boys and girls 
deserve higher praise than these two organizations. 
With the kind permission of each one we print below 
their slogans, mottoes, and laws. Truly the youth 


no Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


of America with these aims before him as he travels 
into the future 

“By the vision splendid 
Is on his way attended.” 

GIRL SCOUTS 

MOTTO 

“Be Prepared ” 

SLOGAN 

“Bo A Good Turn Daily” 

Promise 

On My Honor, I Will Try: 

To do my duty to God and to my Country; 

To help other people at all times; 

To obey the Scout Laws. 

Laws 

I. A Girl Scout’s Honor is to be trusted. 

II. A Girl Scout is loyal. 

III. A Girl Scout’s Duty is to be useful and to help 

others. 

IV. A Girl Scout is a friend to all, and a sister to 

every other Girl Scout. 

V. A Girl Scout is Courteous. 

VI. A Girl Scout is a friend to Animals. 

VII. A Girl Scout obeys Orders. 


Sports and Sportsmanship 


hi 


VIII. A Girl Scout is Cheerful. 

IX. A Girl Scout is Thrifty. 

X. A Girl Scout is Clean in Thought, Word and 
Deed. 


BOY SCOUTS 

The motto and slogan are identical with those of 
the Girl Scout organization. 

THE SCOUT OATH 

On my honor I will do my best: 

1. To do my duty to God and my country, and 

to obey the Scout Law; 

2. To help other people at all times; 

3. To keep myself physically strong, mentally 

awake, and morally straight. 

THE SCOUT LAW 

1. A Scout Is Trustworthy 

A scout's honor is to be trusted. If he were 
to violate his honor by telling a lie, or by 
cheating, or by not doing exactly a given task, 
when trusted on his honor, he may be directed 
to hand over his scout badge. 

2. A Scout Is Loyal 

He is loyal to all to whom loyalty is due; his 
scout leader, his home, and parents and 
country. 


1 12 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


3. A Scout Is Helpful 

He must be prepared at any time to save life, 
help injured persons, an,d share the home 
duties. He must do at least one good turn to 
somebody every day . 

4. A Scout Is Friendly 

He is a friend to all and a brother to every 
other scout. 

5. A Scout Is Courteous 

He is polite to all, especially to women, chil- 
dren, old people, and the weak and helpless. 
He must not take pay for being helpful or cour- 
teous . 

6. A Scout Is Kind 

He is a friend to animals. He will not kill nor 
hurt any living creature needlessly, but will 
strive to save and protect all harmless life. 

7. A Scout Is Obedient 

He obeys his parents, scoutmaster, patrol 
leader, and all other duly constituted author- 
ities. 

8. A Scout Is Cheerful 

He smiles whenever he can. His obedience 
to orders is prompt and cheery. He never 
shirks nor grumbles at hardships. 

9. A Scout Is Thrifty 

He does not wantonly destroy property. He 
works faithfully, wastes nothing, and makes 


Sports and Sportsmanship 


ii 3 


the best use of his opportunities. He saves 
his money so that he may pay his own way, 
be generous to those in need, and helpful to 
worthy objects. He may work for pay but 
must not receive tips for courtesies or good 
turns. 

10. A Scout Is Brave 

He has the courage to face danger in spite of 
fear and to stand up for the right against the 
coaxings of friends or the jeers and threats of 
enemies, and defeat does not down him. 

11. A Scout Is Clean 

He keeps clean in body and thought, stands 
for clean speech, clean sport, clean habits, and 
travels with a clean crowd. 

12. A Scout Is Reverent 

He is reverent toward God. He is faithful in 
his religious duties, and respects the convic- 
tions of others in matters of custom and 
religion. 


CHAPTER XVI 


POLITENESS AND PATRIOTISM 

“Be just and fear not 

Let all the ends thou aim st at be thy country's 
Thy God's and truth's." 


PATRIOTISM 

T HE patriotism that thrills to the sound of 
martial music and the trappings of war and 
catches momentum from the enthusiasm of 
crowds is something that does not have to be taught; 
but from his mother and father a child has to learn 
that after the tumult and the shouting have died 
away from wars and holiday celebrations 

“Yet much remains 

To conquer still: Peace hath her victories 
No less renown’d than War.” 

and that the patriotism of peace is as great as the 
patriotism of battle and that the patriotism which 
lives for the flag is greater than that which shouts for 
it. And before he can be taught the etiquette of the 



“And the Star Spangled Banner In 
Triumph Shall Wave” 



Politeness and Patriotism 


ii5 


flag he must know something about what it means 
and what it stands for. 

THE AMERICAN’S CREED 

“I believe in the United States of America as a 
government of the people, by the people, for the 
people; whose just powers are derived from the 
consent of the governed; a democracy in a Republic; 
a sovereign Nation of many sovereign States; a per- 
fect union, one and inseparable; established upon 
those principles of freedom, equality, justice, and 
humanity for which American patriots sacrificed their 
lives and fortunes. 

“ I therefore believe it is my duty to my country to 
love it; to support its Constitution; to obey its laws; to 
respect its flag; and to defend it against all enemies.” 

THE PARTS OF THE FLAG 

Staff — the flag pole or pike. 

Hoist — the vertical width of the flag next to the 
staff. 

Fly — the horizontal length of the flag. 

Canton — the upper corner next to the staff. 

Union — the device in the canton, in the Stars and 
Stripes, the blue field containing the stars. 

THE COLORS OF THE FLAG 

When Congress adopted the Stars and Stripes, 
Washington said, “We take the star from heaven, the 


1 1 6 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


red from our mother country, separating it by white 
stripes, thus showing that we have separated from 
her, and the stripes go down to posterity representing 
liberty.” The colors have also another symbolism, 
the red standing for courage, the blue for truth, the 
white for purity. 

RAISING THE FLAG 

The flag should never be raised before sunrise nor 
lowered before sunset (except in battle or during a 
siege, and, of course, a child has no concern with these) 
and should not be raised at all during stormy weather 
(except in military posts, etc., where a special storm 
flag is used). It should never be allowed to touch 
the ground and it should always be raised to the top 
of the staff even when it is to be lowered to half mast 
immediately. On Memorial Day it should fly at 
half mast until noon and then should be raised to the 
top of the staff until sunset. 

While the flag is being raised or when it is passing 
in review or on parade the spectators should stop if 
walking, or rise if sitting, and stand at attention, the 
boys and men uncovered, the girls and women with 
their hands at their sides, all ready to give the salute. 


SALUTING THE FLAG 

It is said that the hand flag salute grew out of the 
ancient practice of branding slaves in the palm of the 


Politeness and Patriotism 


117 


hand, and of men upon taking an oath holding up the 
right hand so as to show the clean palm of a free man. 
Whether this be true or not it is a pretty idea that the 
holding up of the hand in salute to the flag is for the 
purpose of showing the clean palm of a loyal Amer- 
ican. 

The hand flag salute consists of raising the hand 
to the forehead above the right eye, palm downward, 
fingers outstretched and close together with the arm 
at an angle of forty-five degrees and carrying it out- 
ward about a foot and dropping it to the side with a 
quick motion. 

The oral flag salute for small children is, 

We give our heads and our hearts to God and our 
country: one language , one flag. 

Older children can master the following: 

I pledge allegiance to my flag , and to the republic for 
which it stands ; one nation , indivisible , with liberty and 
justice for all. 

DISPLAYING THE FLAG 

In all pictorial representations the flag should be 
shown with the staff to the left, the banner floating 
to the right. 

In displaying it out of doors it should properly be 
hung from a staff or swung across a thoroughfare in 
such a way that it cannot deface itself by flapping 
against the walls of buildings. In streets running 
north and south the blue field should be placed 


1 1 8 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


toward the east; in those running east and west, to 
the north. When it is hung with the stripes down- 
ward so as to be seen from one side only the union 
should be at the right as one faces the flag; but if it 
is hung so as to be seen from both sides the union 
should fly at the right of the building (right to be 
determined by facing in the same direction that the 
building does). If the flag is hung horizontally so 
as to be seen from one side only the union should 
be at the left; but if it is to be seen from both 
sides the union should be placed at the right of the 
building. 

The flag should never be worn as a part of a dress 
and when used as a badge it should be placed over the 
left breast or in the left lapel of the coat. 

When it is used in unveiling monuments it should 
not be allowed to touch the floor but after the cere- 
mony should be allowed to float aloft. When it is 
placed over a bier the Union should be at the head. 

The flag should never be draped, rosetted or 
twisted out of shape; it should never be placed below 
a person sitting and nothing except the Bible should 
ever be allowed to rest upon it. If it is used in a 
“glory” or cluster the Stars and Stripes should be at 
the right. In parades it should be placed on a staff 
so that it will fly above the marching columns. It 
should be at the right if it is carried with one flag, 
in front if with several. 

Red, white, and blue bunting make very effective 
decorations and may be used in any way desired. 


Politeness and Patriotism 


119 


The blue stripe should be at the top, then the white, 
then the red. 


A WORN-OUT FLAG 

A ragged or faded flag should never be displayed, 
and when for any reason a flag is beyond use it should 
be either framed under glass like a picture or burned 
so as to prevent possible desecration. 

SPECIAL DAYS FOR DISPLAYING THE FLAG 

Lincoln's Birthday February 12th 

Washington's Birthday February 22nd 

Inauguration Day March 4th 

Battle of Lexington April 19th 

Battle of Manila Bay May 1st 

Mother's Day Second Sunday in May 

Memorial Day May 30th 

There are many different days celebrated farther 
south where the flowers come earlier. April 26 is 
Memorial Day in Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, and 
Florida; May 10th, in North and South Carolina; June 
3rd, in Louisiana; the second Friday in May in 
Tennessee. 

Flag Day June 14th 

Bunker Hill Day June 17th 

Independence Day July 4th 


120 Young Folks * Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Labor Day 
Columbus Day 
Armistice Day 


First Monday in September 
Oct. 1 2 th 
Nov. nth 


NATIONAL SONGS 


Although the “Star-Spangled Banner ” has never 
been formally adopted by Congress, the recognition 
which the Army and Navy have given it make it a 
national anthem if not the national anthem. When it 
is played everyone should rise and stand at attention 
ready for the salute at the close. The same courtesy 
should be shown the national air of any other country 
when it is played as a compliment to a representative 
of that country. 

The Star-Spangled Banner should never be played 
as a recessional nor as a part of a medley nor indis- 
criminately on all occasions but only when the sur- 
roundings are likely to induce a feeling of patriotism 
and reverence. 


SUGGESTIONS FOR PARTIES 
AND OTHER ENTERTAINMENTS 



SUGGESTIONS FOR PARTIES AND OTHER 
ENTERTAINMENTS 

PARTIES IN GENERAL 



'HE happiest moments in the life of a man or 


woman are those in which they remember the 
happy days of their childhood. It is a pity there are 
not more of these — it takes so little to make them, 
and to most children the summit of earthly bliss is 
reached in the giddy rapture that comes from going 
to a party or a picnic. 

Roughly speaking, there are two kinds of parties, 
the “dress-up” variety where every one is on his 
p’s and q’s, and the informal frolic where old clothes 
play a large part and conventionalities are thrown 
aside for a time. Properly educated a child will be 
able thoroughly to enjoy either one. As sad a spec- 
tacle as the youngster too timid or too ignorant of 
the amenities of polite society to mingle with the 
other guests at an indoor fete is that of a blase child 
too bored to join in a rollicking good time out in the 
woods. 

Aside from their value as pure entertainment the 
seasonal parties have another use. Through them a 


123 


124 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


child learns to associate many of America's greatest 
men and dearest traditions with joy and gladness and 
youth and hope instead of the almost tragic serious- 
ness which comes later. However weary the guard- 
ians of children may be of axes and cherry trees and 
cupids and log cabins and pumpkins and red bells 
they must remember that these things are new to 
the little people; and however deep the heartache 
which Christmas brings to the parents it should bring 
only joy to the children; however sharp the pang 
which the sight of the flag sends to the breast of the 
mother it should bear only a thrill to that of her 
child. 

In getting a house ready for a party no pains 
should be spared to make it attractive. Children 
react unconsciously to the beauty around them, 
and lovely flowers and music and a general air of 
gaiety carries them away at once to realms of en- 
chantment. 

But, however beautifully the house may be decor- 
ated, the work of the hostess is only half done when 
she has finished it, and the slogan of every successful 
entertainer is, “A good time for every guest." If 
games are to furnish the amusement they should be 
carefully chosen beforehand and active ones alter- 
nated with quiet ones so that the children will not be 
worn out. If there is dancing it is the duty of the 
hostess (the child can help here) to see that no bashful 
little boy shrinks into the corner and that no un- 
happy little girl sits neglected against the wall. 


Parties and Other Entertainments 125 


Boys as a rule do not take kindly to the dress-up form 
of entertainment, and a test of the ability of a hostess 
is the joy which a small boy is able to extract from 
her parties. The games should begin at once. At 
first children are nearly always galvanized into a 
kind of stiffness that must be broken down. Small 
parties are usually the most successful. Large num- 
bers are too unwieldy. 

There should always be favors of some kind for the 
youngsters to carry away as tangible evidence of the 
fleeting joy of the occasion. These may be pre- 
sented in a variety of ways. Three of the most ap- 
proved are through fish ponds, grab bags, and Jack 
Horner pies. For the fish pond each small gift is 
wrapped in such a way that a thread is left dangling 
for the fish hook to be thrust through. They are 
placed back of a screen over which the fishing pole 
is extended and some one who is concealed behind it 
fastens the packages to the hooks and the young an- 
glers pull in their catch. Or they may be placed in a 
long low basin that looks somewhat like a real fish 
pond in which case each guest must catch his fish with- 
out assistance. For a grab bag the gifts are wrapped 
and placed within a bag or other receptacle and each 
child after being blindfolded reaches in his hand and 
draws out a prize. The Jack Horner pies offer many 
charming variations and they may be secured from 
the shops in so many different shapes that an appro- 
priate pie may be found for almost any party. A rose 
a pumpkin, a snowball, a basket and many other 


126 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


ordinary objects may be used as models. The gifts 
are concealed within and to each one is attached a 
ribbon at the other end of which (this end is outside 
the pie) the child’s name is fastened. Each guest 
takes his streamer in hand and when the hostess gives 
the signal they all pull at once and the gifts come to 
light in a merry flutter. 

The refreshments for a children’s party should be 
toothsome, wholesome, and pretty to look at. It is a 
poor sort of hospitality which plies a child with so 
many sweets that there is always a dismal morning 
with the doctor on the day after. 

The best time for a party for children under ten is 
between four and seven in the afternoon and it should 
never continue for more than two or three hours. 
Children tire very quickly. For older boys and girls 
evening dances and parties may be given but they 
should not last later than eleven o’clock except once 
in a great while on some special occasion like New 
Year’s. 

All entertainments given by children should be 
under the guidance and chaperonage of older people, 
but the small hosts and hostesses should feel that a 
large part of the responsibility of getting ready for 
their guests and making them have a good time rests 
with them. 

In the suggestions for parties on the pages which 
follow, only the distinctive features for each occasion 
are given. The hostess must supplement and delete 
and combine to make her entertainment suitable for 


Parties and Other Entertainments 127 


her home and for the particular group of children 
for whose enjoyment it is given. 

NEW YEAR 

TN ORDER that the New Year may have a halo of 
its own and not be merely a warmed-over Christ- 
mas, all holly wreaths, red bells, and other special 
decorations are taken down. There is green in abun- 
dance, and mistletoe. This last for luck. It is an 
old superstition that evil spirits will stay away 
from the house ir which mistletoe hangs on New 
Year's day. 

Everyone, small children as well as older ones, is 
interested in the fortunes which the year will bring 
and any of the popular methods of looking into the 
future may be called into service. A way that has 
been used many times at the beginning of the year 
is to place twelve lighted candles on the floor in a 
row, each one symbolizing by its color the month for 
which it stands. If the child can jump over them all 
he will have good luck throughout the year, but if he 
upsets or extinguishes one some dire calamity is in 
store for him during the month for which the candle 
stands. 

There is no more reason for denying children the 
pleasure which comes from fortune telling and play- 
ing with superstitions than there is for prohibiting 
fairies or Santa Claus. Yet they must be handled 
sanely, for if undue weight is attached to them, or if 


128 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


the child is led to believe too firmly in them they may 
be very harmful. 

A watch-night party is not suitable for small chil- 
dren and for older ones there must be some especially 
attractive form of amusement to keep them from 
being sleepy when twelve o’clock comes. A skating 
party or a sleigh ride followed by a hot supper at 
eleven will put the merrymakers in good shape to 
give a rousing welcome to the New Year. 

VALENTINE 

A VALENTINE party is one of the easiest and 
prettiest of all parties to prepare for. The 
rooms should be gay with red berries and roses or 
carnations, and vines and ferns and hearts. The 
hearts may be cut from red cardboard and festooned 
about the room. Favors, and the shop windows 
fairly beam with these, should represent either St. 
Valentine or his ambassador, Cupid. The small host 
and hostess may be attired like the Knave and the 
Queen of hearts and they may ask their guests to 
come dressed in the same way. Red hearts scattered 
over a white dress with a red cardboard crown upon 
the head will transform any tiny maiden into a most 
acceptable queen. 

An archery contest with a heart-shaped target 
graduated into smaller hearts should find a place 
among the amusements. When the contest must 
be held in a room where the guests are necessarily 


Parties and Other Entertainments 129 


close to the target the difficulty of reaching the centre 
may be increased by blindfolding each contestant. 

The valentines — for of course there must be a valen- 
tine for every guest — may be distributed through a 
Post Office, one child acting as postmaster and calling 
the names of the others. Also there must be for- 
tunes. These may be concealed within a heart- 
shaped Jack Horner pie which is placed in the centre 
of the dining table if dinner is to be served or on a 
table in the drawing room if there are to be only light 
refreshments. 

Sandwiches cut in the shape of hearts or tied into 
a scroll with a red ribbon, or round tomato sand- 
wiches with a bit of red showing through, cream in 
the shape of hearts or cupids, and many other dainty 
touches give distinction to the refreshments. 

A word of caution about sandwiches. They should 
never be so fancifully cut or tied as to suggest that 
they have been handled a great deal. They are more 
palatable when they are a little less beautiful. 

WASHINGTON’S BIRTHDAY 

O UAINTNESS and charm attend a Washington’s 
birthday party given according to the custom 
of the time in which he lived. Invitations are 
written on large sheets of paper and sent without 
envelopes. The paper is folded so that the top and 
bottom edges meet in the middle. Then the sides 
are folded over, one overlapping to receive the sealing 


130 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


wax and seal. The old-fashioned s which looks in 
script very much like an / and the article ye instead 
of the are used. 


An ye pleafe to come, ye fhall be right wel- 
come at ye home of Miftreff Agnef Sheppard 
on ye ev’ning of ye twenty-fecond day of 
February. Pleafe come in ye old-time coun- 
trie dreff at ye hour of eight. 


Martha Washington dresses are easy enough to 
make and most thrilling to wear. The smallest girl 
feels quite grown-up in one of them especially if her 
hair is powdered and piled high on her head. Boys 
are not so easily fitted out but a little study of the 
pictures in history books of the period will furnish 
ideas as to how a twentieth-century suit of clothes 
may be made to look as if it belonged to a gentleman 
of nearly two hundred years ago. 

The house should be decorated in patriotic colors 
or in Colonial colors, blue and buff. Napkins are 
folded into cocked hats, and turkey which was to 
Washington “the new bird of this country”, and ice- 
cream, then called frozen custard, are features of the 
refreshments. If a dinner is served corn-bread, 
sweet potatoes, and cider should find a place on the 
menu. The hostess is fortunate if she possesses 
blue English or Canton china which with a daffodil 


Parties and Other Entertainments 13 1 


at every plate and a large bowl of them in the centre 
of the table makes a most inviting setting for a feast. 

The ideal amusement for the evening is the Virginia 
Reel danced to the tune of a darkey's fiddle, or an old- 
fashioned square dance if some one can be found to 
call “ Swingyour partner,” “ Salute your partner,” and 
“Balance all” and the rest of it at the proper times. 

A game specially suited to the occasion is called 
“Washington crossing the Delaware.” The players 
are divided into two groups who station themselves in 
two homes or bases some distance apart with a line 
drawn half way between to represent the river. The 
players on each side are given names of certain ad- 
verbs as anxiously, blindly, cautiously, or drunkenly, 
etc. When they are all in place and all named the 
leader of one side calls to the other, 

“Washington is crossing the Delaware.” 

“How?” 

“A.” 

The player whose name begins with “A” crosses 
the intervening space in the manner described by the 
adverb for which the letter stands while the group 
on the other side try to guess what it is. If “Wash- 
ington” is able to touch their base line and get back 
to his own people before they have guessed it he is 
safe. But if he is caught (and the players give chase 
as soon as they have guessed correctly) he goes to 
that side. The side which has the greater number 
of players at the end of the game is victor. Appro- 
priate adverbs are angrily, alertly, bashfully, blindly, 


132 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


boldly, cautiously, carelessly, drunkenly, daringly, 
eagerly, frantically, gracefully, hurriedly, indignantly 
and many others. 

ST. PATRICK’S DAY 

T HE invitations for St. Patrick’s day should bear 
some design suggestive of the occasion, a sham- 
rock, a shillelah, a pig, a potato, or a black cock. 
Formerly every year in Ireland on the 17th of March 
a black cock was killed in honor of the patron 
saint of the island. The significance of the other 
emblems is too well known to be repeated. 

Green should be used in prodigal abundance in 
decorating. Ferns and smilax with here and there a 
few flowers suggestive of the coming spring are charm- 
ingly fitted to the season. If there is a dinner the 
centrepiece may be a pig with an apple in his mouth, 
“the gintleman that pays the rint,” the sacred cock, 
a yacht modelled after one of the famous Shamrocks 
or it may be a Jack Horner pie. Green candles may 
be used but they should not be shaded with green, 
and the whole menu should be as near green and 
white as possible. Appropriate dishes are green- 
pea soup, potato salad nestling in lettuce leaves, 
spring lamb with mint sauce, cakes iced in green and 
white, pistache ice-cream and green-and-white after- 
dinner mints. 

The guests may be entertained by games or they 
may have a bubbles party (See page 153). 


Parties and Other Entertainments 133 


If they are old enough for it they will enjoy a con- 
test to determine which of them blindfolded can draw 
the best pig. None of the productions will look very 
much like pigs but a prize should be given to the artist 
whose work is least bad. 

Each guest may be called upon to tell a joke or a 
story, preferably Irish. If they are warned before- 
hand the results will be much better. 

APRIL FIRST 

T^UN may go as far as one likes but coarse practi- 
cal joking is out of place even on April Fool's 
day. This is a good time for a masquerade or a 
backward party. The first needs no description and 
no eulogy. For many years it has been one of the 
most popular of entertainments. In the second 
everything is done in exactly the opposite way from 
that which custom directs. The invitations are 
written so that they have to be held up before a 
mirror to be read. The guests put on their clothes 
backward, walk backward, talk backward, in so far 
as it is possible to do so and remain intelligible, and 
eat backward. Dinner is served backward and every- 
thing is disguised. Olives are hidden under nut 
shells, salad is placed inside a banana peeling, meat 
is concealed under a mound of rice or potatoes and 
among the real cakes are sham ones made of iced pill 
boxes. Cups are used instead of glasses, soup plates 
instead of dinner plates, and everything is topsy- 


134 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


turvy. Games are played by any rules except the 
right ones with the exception of the Japanese Crab 
Race which is run strictly “according to Hoyle/' 
During an interval when they need rest from active 
games each child is furnished with a piece of paper 
and a pencil on which to write the alphabet back- 
ward, the one who performs this feat most quickly 
receiving a prize. 

A fish pond is a peculiarly suitable form of enter- 
tainment on April Fool's day since in France the 
fish is the symbol of the first of April, the significance 
rising, of course, out of the ease with which people 
are “caught." 


EASTER 


JMOST as good as Santa Claus is the rabbit 



EY which lays the Easter eggs. It is said that this 
delightful creature was a bird until the goddess 
Eastre took pity on it, for it seems not to have liked 
being a bird, and changed it into a rabbit. Since 
that time once every year, out of remembrance of its 
former life and out of gratitude to the goddess it 
lays brilliantly colored eggs. 

For an Easter egg hunt either hardboiled eggs or 
candy ones may be used. They should be hidden 
out of doors in clumps of grass when it is possible 
and trifling prizes offered for those who find the 
largest number and for those who find certain marked 
eggs that bring special rewards. 

After the hunt there may be a potato race except 


Parties and Other Entertainments 135 


that an egg is used instead of a potato. Each runner 
has an egg in a spoon and the one who finishes first 
without dropping the egg is the victor. And there 
may be a contest in which each player strikes an egg 
against one held in the hand of another player, the 
egg that breaks being forfeited to the child who 
struck it. The one with the largest number at the 
end of the contest wins a small prize. 

A dinner table can be made especially attractive at 
Easter with a tiny pool on which ducks are floating 
in the centre. If the pool is made of a flat mirror the 
ducks may be fuzzy but if it is a basin of real water 
the ducks should be celluloid. It should be edged 
with something to represent the green grass of the 
bank growing all around. The gaily colored candy 
eggs, the downy yellow chickens, ducks, geese, and 
goslings make cunning favors or place cards to have 
at the plate of each diner but where there are so 
many things to choose from the hostess must be care- 
ful not to overcrowd her table. 


MAYTIME 


HE invitations to a Maytime party may be writ- 



A en on a tiny basket of flowers, and everything 
about the party whether it is given at the first or the 
last day of the month should be in keeping with the 
season. Sweet peas, apple blossoms (crab apple blos- 
soms are lovely) or some other early flowers should 
be used in decorating. Refreshments should be in 


136 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


marked contrast to the hot things usually served in 
winter, and strawberries with or in cream, pink-and- 
white cakes and pink-and-white bonbons are in 
keeping with the spring weather outside, or with the 
spring weather which ought to be outside, if the 
merry month of May lives up to the reputation 
which the poets have given her. 

For an indoor entertainment a sweet-pea party is 
suggested. (See page 152) but if there is a spacious 
lawn or a wooded grove anywhere near there must 
be a Maypole dance. 

For this, a pole about ten feet high, six inches 
thick, firmly set, and tapering is erected. Rainbow- 
colored streamers of ribbon or cambric are fastened 
securely about a foot from the top and the fastening 
concealed by a wreath of leaves and flowers. There 
should be merry tunes for the dance and if each tiny 
dancer has bells strapped to his or her ankles the effect 
will be much prettier. When the children have 
grown tired of skipping around it is time to plait the 
streamers. This is done by letting half the dancers 
take ribbons in their right hands, the other half in 
their left while they face each other in couples. When 
the music begins (preferably a familiar tune to which 
they can sing as they dance) each child steps past 
the one facing him, passing under the ribbon which 
he holds and allowing the next child to pass under 
his ribbon and so on until the streamers begin to 
grow so short as to interfere with their steps. Then 
the order is reversed and the ribbons unwound. 


Parties and Other Entertainments 137 


The Queen of May is chosen soon after the arrival 
of the guests or she may be appointed many days 
before the party, especially if she has to prepare a 
royal robe. She sits on her throne, where she has 
been placed by her devoted subjects, while they dance 
and after a while if she is not too haughty she de- 
scends to tread a measure herself. The other 
children may wear simple summer frocks or they may 
be gowned as shepherdesses, milkmaids, or fairies. 
Boys like to appear as the merry outlaws of Sherwood 
Forest, or Indian braves or something else equally 
romantic, but their costumes should be somewhat in 
harmony with those of the girls unless it is understood 
that it is to be a miscellaneous costume party. If the 
party is given in the section of the country where 
winter lingers in the lap of spring until nearly June 
the mothers should watch well to see that their chil- 
dren are not too thinly clad. 

FOURTH OF JULY 

T HE invitations for a Fourth of July party may 
be written on thin paper and rolled into red 
cylinders which have been made to look like fire- 
crackers by having tissue paper pasted across the 
ends, from one of which protrudes a bit of string to 
represent the fuse. The guests should wear red, 
white, or blue or should add it in the form of rosettes 
or streamers to their ordinary costumes. Bunting 
and flags should be everywhere. 


138 Young Folks' ' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


For an evening party fireworks may form the chief 
amusement but in order that the holiday may be 
safe as well as glorious the buying of these should be 
thoughtfully done and their firing off carefully super- 
intended. For an afternoon party games may fur- 
nish the entertainment. Nine-pins with the pins 
made to look like big firecrackers and Washington 
Crossing the Delaware described in the Washington's 
birthday party (page 129) are specially suited to the 
occasion. 

The refreshments should be chosen with regard to 
the summer weather. Punch and ice cream are 
always grateful, and a mound of vanilla cream with 
a tiny flag stuck through it has a most patriotic air. 

The guests may be greeted with a military salute, 
the call to refreshments may be given with a bugle 
and retreat sounded as they depart. 

HALLOWE'EN 

T 3 EST of all times for a children's party is Hal- 
lowe’en, and best of all places is an old barn or 
a big bare kitchen. Everything should be informal 
— it is a time for fun and frolic made exciting by an 
atmosphere of gloom and mystery. This may be 
secured through the decorations. The long gray 
moss of the Southern woods draped around the walls 
suggests a witch's grotto or a goblin's cave, but 
branches of autumn leaves and trophies of the har- 
vest are almost as effective. All lights should come 


Parties and Other Entertainments 139 


from Jack o' Lanterns, and within dark recesses they 
should light up black cats with fierce yellow eyes, 
grinning death's heads, spiders made of wire and 
bats with black leathery wings. An inexpensive 
Jack o' Lantern is made by outlining a face on a 
paper bag and then drawing it over an electric bulb 
and fastening it into place with a rubber band. 

The party should not be so weird and ghostly as 
to keep the little people in a tremor of fright and some 
of the games and contests should be carried on under 
the reassuring glow of unshaded lights. For these 
the children may be carried into another room or a 
single light may be uncovered in the room where 
they are. The old sentimental charms like the old 
sentimental games, have no place in a children's party 
and a little girl has no business walking down a dark 
stairway or going out into the night to circle around 
the house or a walnut tree or to pull up a stalk of kale 
to see the face or find out the name or the state of 
heart of her lover. 

When they first arrive the children should be made 
to jump over a broom stick which has been nailed 
across the door to keep out evil spirits and the hostess 
should extend in greeting not her own hand but a 
kid glove filled with wet sand. The guests may 
come dressed as ghosts (very easily accomplished by 
folding ordinary sheets) but young children should 
not wear masks. 

What the pumpkin is to Thanksgiving the apple is 
to Hallowe'en. No party is complete without a 


140 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


tub half filled with water in which are floating a num- 
ber of stemless Baldwins or pippins. These the 
children secure by bobbing and lifting them out with 
their teeth. In another contest a number of apples 
are suspended from a revolving hoop. Each guest 
tries to bite one off as it passes by. Doughnuts are 
used in the same way. In another contest an apple 
is impaled on the tines of a fork hanging in mid- 
air from a string tied at the base of the handle on 
the end of which is a piece of burnt cork or colored 
chalk. The young contestant must try to get a 
bite of the apple without letting the cork touch 
him. After every child has somehow or another 
gotten an apple each one should throw the peeling 
of one over his shoulder, the manner in which it falls 
either making or suggesting the name of his or her 
sweetheart. 

There are many ridiculous contests which should 
be interspersed among the unearthly parts of the 
entertainment. A hearty laugh will banish the 
ghostliest spook that ever emerged from a grave at 
midnight. For one of these each contestant is given 
a glass of water and a spoon. The one who drinks 
his first, a spoonful at a time, wins the race. For 
another the corner of a dry soda cracker is placed in 
the mouth of each child and the one who can first 
eat his and whistle gets a small prize for his pains. 
For another each child holds in his mouth the handle 
of a spoon full of water, and the one who can show 
the most water in his spoon after the race is pro- 


Parties and Other Entertainments 141 


nounced victor. In another two children are blind- 
folded and placed on opposite sides of a small table 
on which there is a lighted candle. They are turned 
around three times and then told to blow out the 
candle. For still another all of the children are 
seated on bottles each one with a needle and a bit of 
thread in his hands. The one who first succeeds in 
balancing himself on the bottle and passing the thread 
through the eye of the needle wins a reward of some 
kind. 

Fortunes may be told in a variety of ways. Per- 
haps the prettiest of these is by setting walnut shells 
containing tiny colored candles afloat in a basin of 
water. Each craft symbolizes the life of one of the 
children and the way in which it sails is prophetic 
of the course which it is to take. A little jostling of 
the basin will make them behave in all sorts of queer 
ways. Greased needles may be set afloat in pretty 
much the same way and fortunes determined by the 
way they act. 

Melted lead dropped into cold water indicates by 
the shape it takes the fortune of the child who dropped 
it. Some older person should always be at hand to 
interpret these mystic symbols. 

Three plates are set upon a table, one containing 
clear water and one muddy while the third is left 
empty. They denote respectively, a happy marriage, 
marriage with a widow or a widower, and single 
blessedness. The child determines which is to be 
his lot by advancing blindfolded and placing the fore- 


142 Young Folks' Fncyclopcedia of Etiquette 


finger of his left hand in one of them. Similarly 
he may discover whether he is to be wealthy, 
moderately well-to-do, or poor, if the first plate con- 
tains corn and the second rice while the third is 
left empty. 

If the hostess prefers, the fortunes may be told by 
a gipsy or a ghost (an aunt or an older sister may be 
pressed into service for this) who reads the future 
through tea leaves, cards, or palms. Or they may 
be written in couplets with milk or invisible ink on 
slips of paper which have to be passed over a candle 
before the writing becomes legible. 

Within the Hallowe'en cake are concealed a ring, 
a thimble, a dime, arid a key, signifying in the order 
in which they are named a happy marriage, spinster- 
hood or bachelordom, great riches, and much travel- 
ling. 

If before she goes to bed a girl eats three plain 
crackers and a teaspoonful of salt and drinks no 
water afterward she is likely to dream (if she escapes 
short of actual nightmare she is lucky) of some one 
bringing her water. The kind of vessel in which it 
is brought indicates the amount of wealth which she 
will have in the future. Gold or silver means great 
riches; tin or nickel, moderate wealth; and wood or 
other poor material, poverty. If the water is clear 
she will be very fortunate but if it is muddy, bad luck 
is waiting around the corner for her. 

The hostess may use her own discretion about re- 
freshments but if anything is served besides fruits 


Parties and Other Entertainments 


H3 


and candies it should go under such names as Witch’s 
Broth, Brownies’ Delight or Goblin’s Ale. 


BIRTHDAYS 



•O A child there are usually only two days in 


the year worth mentioning — Christmas and his 
birthday. Almost any kind of party is appropriate 
for the latter, the only distinctive feature being the 
cake bearing a candle for every year of the life of the 
youngster for whom the party is given. These may 
be blown out by the guests, if there are not too 
many guests, each one making a wish as he extin- 
guishes the candle. On account of the excessive 
amount of attention paid the honoree there should 
be an especially attractive souvenir for each one of 
the other children; and children should learn to help 
celebrate other people's birthdays as well as their 
own. A party for mother or father is almost as much 
fun as one for oneself. 


SEWING PARTIES 


E VEN very small young ladies enjoy sitting 
around and talking while they sew. If they 
are at all skilful with the needle they will get more 
pleasure out of their work if it is done for a special 
purpose, for the children in an orphan’s home, for 
instance. Before they have reached this state of 
proficiency they can make dolls’ dresses and hats, 


144 Young Folks y Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


aprons for themselves, towels and many other simple 
articles. The sober part of the afternoon should be 
followed by a merry romp and plenty of good things 
to eat. 


A PEANUT PARTY 

I N A party of this kind the fun is sure to be hilar- 
iously informal for there can be nothing dignified 
about a peanut. 

The invitations may be on very thin paper and 
folded into a peanut shell tied together with ribbon 
and delivered by hand. 

The schedule of games should be carefully planned. 
A peanut hunt should come first if the peanuts are 
to be hidden in the room where the party is to be 
held. Each guest is provided with a small bag and a 
prize is given to the child who first fills his with 
peanuts. The score may be kept more elaborately 
by having colored peanuts and letting each color 
count for a certain number of points, as gold, five; 
blue, three; green, two; natural, one; black, minus 
two. Or there may be special prize peanuts marked 
in such a way as to denote the reward they bring. 
All prizes should be the merest trifles. 

A game much like jackstraws is obtained by placing 
a mound of peanuts on a table and providing each 
player with a hook (a button hook will do) and offer- 
ing a prize to the one who can secure the largest num- 
ber without disturbing the others on the pile. A 


Parties and Other Entertainments 145 


similar contest is spearing peanuts out of a bowl with 
a hat-pin. 

There are several ways of arranging a peanut race. 
In one of them, each runner has a bowl of peanuts 
from which he scoops as many as he can hold on the 
back of his hand and dashes across the room to an- 
other bowl in which he places them. The one who 
first transfers his stock wins the race. In another, 
each runner holds a peanut on the blade of a knife 
as he runs, the one who succeeds in keeping the 
peanut longest winning the race. In another, two 
lines are chalked on the floor about three yards apart. 
A peanut is placed for each runner on the starting 
line, and the child who first pushes his with his nose 
to the other line is victor. 

MOCK OUTDOOR TRACK MEET 

rjlHE Obstacle Race . All sorts of obstacles may 
J- be set up according to the nature of the course 
over which the race is to be run — hurdles to jump 
over, barrels to run through, narrow passageways to 
be gone between, rocks to climb over, etc., etc. 
There is no limit to the number of things that can 
be done but this race should not be too strenuous 
because there are others to follow. 

Three-legged Race . The players run in pairs, one 
leg of each tied to a leg of another. It is very difficult 
,to run and very funny to see. 

Sack Race . The lower limbs of the runners are 


146 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


incased in heavy burlap bags which are tied around 
their waists. 

Wheelbarrow Race . This is another race in which 
the players run in pairs. The one who is called the 
wheelbarrow walks on his hands while the other run- 
ner holds his feet. The pair to cross the line first is, 
of course, the victor. 

Hopping Race. This is too familiar to need de- 
scription. The course is laid out and the players 
hop to the end. 

Chariot Race. Two or three players lock arms and 
race against other groups in the same position. If 
any one breaks hold he disqualifies his “chariot” and 
the race goes to his opponent. 

The track meet may be arranged in a sort of tourna- 
ment with the girls for spectators since the races are 
mostly designed for boys. 

A CARNIVAL OF THE FIVE SENSES 

SEEING. A miscellaneous collection of articles 
LJ is laid out on a table or displayed as if in a shop 
window. Each contestant is given a sheet of paper 
and a pencil and is allowed to pass slowly by the dis- 
play into another room where he is told to write out 
the names of all the objects he can remember. If the 
number of articles is very small they may be covered 
until time for the players to begin to write and dis- 
closed for a moment only. A mirror may be given 


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A Party Dress That Will Gladden the Heart 
of Any Little Girl 



Parties and Other Entertainments 147 


to the one with the longest list and a pair of goggles 
to the one with the shortest. 

Hearing. The sense of hearing may be tested by 
having someone play snatches of familiar tunes on 
the piano with an occasional perplexing one to make 
the guessing a little more difficult. If no musical 
instrument is available such noises as the pouring of 
coal out of a scuttle, the tinkling of a spoon against 
a glass, the ringing of an iron bell, etc., may be 
substituted. A musical toy might be given for the 
first prize, a tin horn for the booby. 

Smelling . The players must be blindfolded during 
this part of the test while various substances are 
passed beneath their noses for recognition. The 
names should be jotted down while the players are 
still blinded and a few moments allowed after the 
contest to make them legible. It will be all the 
more baffling if the odors are all familiar ones such as 
camphor, vinegar, coffee, ammonia, banana, etc. 
The first prize may be a bottle of perfume, the booby 
an onion highly decorated with frilly petticoats. 

Tasting. The bandages must be worn during this 
contest also. This should not be an unpleasant part 
of the game, and although cloves, allspice, lemon, etc., 
may be offered it is best to get the little flavored candy 
drops, giving each guest one of the same kind at the 
same time and numbering them so that the lists can 
be checked at the close of the contest. A box of 
candy may be given for the first prize, a stick of li- 
corice for the consolation. 


148 Young Folks Encyclopaedia of Etiquette 


Feeling . The bandages may be removed for the 
last test. A number of bundles of all sorts and 
shapes and sizes, securely wrapped and distinctly 
numbered are placed on a table. Each child may 
feel a bundle as long as he likes but must not tear the 
paper which wraps it. When he has decided what it 
contains he writes his guess and the number of the 
bundle on his sheet of paper. A fan is an appropriate 
first prize, with a pin-cushion for the booby. 


A SURPRISE PARTY 


O FTEN the mother of the child in whose honor a 
surprise party is to be given is taken into the 
secret. Its success depends upon the completeness 
of the surprise, and the conspirators should gather 
promptly and enter the house in a group. The en- 
tertainment may take almost any form — dancing 
or games are appropriate — but it should be marked 
with informality throughout. 


A POUND PARTY 


HE pound party is an old-fashioned way of en- 



A tertaining. Each guest brings a pound of 
something to eat, candy, nuts, fruit, cakes and other 
delectables and throughout the evening or afternoon 
games are played. Sometimes this and a tackey 
party are happily fused into one; at other times the 


Parties and Other Entertainments 149 


guests bring pounds of provisions for poor people and 
ordinary refreshments are served. 

A TACKEY PARTY 

AT A tackey party each guest wears the least 
tasteful costume he or she can manage, and 
small boys and girls draw freely upon the cast-off 
clothes of their mothers and fathers. A hat and coat 
of style ten years old combined with a skirt and shoes 
of some other period, all assembled with utter disre- 
gard of harmony in color, forms a most grotesque and 
comic outfit. The fun is greatly increased when each 
child impersonates the character which he represents, 
the backwoods farmer talking like a backwoods 
farmer, the silly little girl giggling and simpering all 
the time, the bashful child hanging its head and 
thrusting its thumb into its mouth when it is spoken 
to and the shrewish woman talking and acting in a 
way that is quite terrifying. Children have more 
dramatic talent than their elders give them credit for; 
and the borrowed plumage takes away self-conscious- 
ness. The refreshments should be peppermint sticks, 
lollipops, lemonade, and ginger cakes. 

CANDY PULLING 

B ACK in the good old nearly forgotten days, when 
everything was plentiful and no one had to 
worry about the high cost of living, candy pullings 
were held out of doors in the fall of the year when the 


150 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


cane was being ground into juice, and the juice was 
being made into syrup and a part of the syrup could 
be placed in a huge cauldron and made into candy. 
Nowadays the cauldron has dwindled into a tiny pot 
on the kitchen stove, but there lingers around it 
something of the charm of the happy groups which 
gathered around the cane mills long ago. 

The person who cooks the candy should be expert 
enough to have it nearly done when the guests arrive, 
especially if there is to be a large quantity. Each 
child should wear old clothes and there should be 
plenty of towels, soap, and warm and cold water at 
hand. Molasses candy at its best is sticky. When 
the candy has cooled sufficiently each child should be 
given a batch to pull — it is more fun to pull in pairs 
if the children are old enough to manage it — and a 
prize given the one whose candy is the prettiest. 

This is the easiest kind of candy when the crowd is 
rather large but with smaller groups fudge parties 
and divinity parties are equally successful. 


AN INDIAN PARTY 


HE invitations should be written on birchbark 



A (real or imitation), pine bark, a chip or some- 
thing else equally primitive and should request In- 
dian costume. Many children have these already 
and any child can improvise one with a blanket and a 
paint brush and a few feathers. The party should 
be out of doors, out in the woods if possible, and the 


Parties and Other Entertainments 151 


children’s games will take care of themselves. The 
youngsters fall naturally into the roles of patient 
squaws and captive maids, dashing braves and fiery 
warriors. 

Simple refreshments may be served picnic fashion 
but it is more in keeping with the occasion, and if 
the party is a small one, more fun, to cook something. 
Strips of bacon impaled on the ends of sticks and 
browned over live coals are delicious; sausages simi- 
larly prepared and thrust into a split roll with plenty 
of mustard on the inside are equally delightful. 
Marshmallows and fruit finish out a woodland menu. 
The best time for a party of this sort is in the fall just 
when there is beginning to be a bite of frost in the air. 

A CLOVER PARTY 

T HE chief requisites for a clover party are a big 
patch of clover and a sunshiny day. The in- 
vitations should suggest that the guests wear old 
clothes and come prepared to frolic. The time should 
be spent in hunting four-leaf clovers, making flower 
chains from clover blossoms and playing out-door 
games. The refreshments should consist of a picnic 
lunch spread on the ground. 

A SPIDER-WEB PARTY 

A SPIDER-WEB party may be held on the lawn 
or in the house. In the centre of the web there 
is an enormous papier-mache spider (or a tiny wire 


152 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


one if this cannot be obtained) from whose body issue 
as many cords as there are guests. These wind around 
in all directions through devious ways and finally end 
under a chair or back of a curtain or on top of a desk 
with small gifts for the children who have followed 
them to the end. The spider web will not fill an 
entire evening although it will go a long way toward 
it, and there should be a regular programme of other 
games to furnish entertainment for the rest of the 
time. 


A BON-VOYAGE PARTY 
BON-VOYAGE party is given for a child who 



** is going away on a long journey. Each guest 
brings a letter or a package decorated with good luck 
symbols and marked to be opened at a certain time 
or place along the way. The presentation of the gifts 
is saved until near the end of the affair, the first part 
of the time being filled with games and other amuse- 


ments. 


A SWEET-PEA PARTY 


/^iNE of the daintiest of parties and expensive 
according to whether the hostess lives in the 
country where she has her own flowers or in town 
where she has to depend on the florist, is a sweet- 
pea party. Preferably it is held on a lawn or wide 
porch but an airy parlor will serve. Sweet peas and 
asparagus or fern should be everywhere in profusion 
and the guests should wear dresses in light pastel 


Parties and Other Entertainments 153 


shades: green, blue, pink, etc. The fact that every- 
thing is pretty to look at is not sufficient entertain- 
ment for the little people, and there should be dancing 
or games to provide amusement. Pink-and-white 
bonbons, and pink-and-white ice-cream and cake will 
finish out a perfect afternoon. 

Almost any flower may be substituted for the 
sweet-pea or there may be a flower festival in which 
each little girl comes dressed as the flower she likes 
best. Beautiful costumes may be made from crepe 
paper but simple additions to the usual party frock 
suggest the flower which the wearer represents. 

A BUBBLES PARTY 

/CHILDREN should come in the simplest of cos- 
tumes to a bubbles party. Upon their arrival 
they find a basin of Castile suds (to which has been 
added a little glycerine to make the bubbles less apt 
to break) standing in the centre of a table which, if the 
weather is favorable, is placed out of doors. Each one 
is given a clay pipe and there are several in reserve 
ready to take the place of any which may be broken. 

There is fun in blowing bubbles for their own sake 
but there will be even more fun if a small prize is 
given to the child who blows the largest bubble, the 
one who blows the greatest number with the same 
breath, the one who blows the longest, etc., and to 
the best all-round bubble blower. 

As many small bundles as there are guests are sus- 


154 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


pended from a cord, so that they dangle just above 
their heads. Each one is wrapped in bright tissue 
paper and each one contains a gift. Those that are 
suitable for boys are hung a little apart and are 
wrapped in darker paper. The children stand on a 
line some distance back from the bundles and one at 
a time they blow a bubble which is to be wafted by 
the breath until it touches the bundle desired. If 
the child is successful he takes it down and some 
one else tries for another. No one can have a prize 
unless he can earn it by touching it with a bubble. 
The gifts may be as inexpensive or as elaborate as 
taste and means decree. 


A JAPANESE PARTY 


HE invitations should be written up and down, 



JL not back and forth, on Japanese paper in shaded 
script which makes them look as if they might really 
be Japanese. 

The rooms in which the party is held are decorated 
with green branches and cherry blossoms, wistaria, 
chrysanthemums or other flowers which suggest the 
land of the Mikado. Mats are scattered about the 
floor on which the guests seat themselves but chairs 
are also provided so that when they tire of the oriental 
position they may change to a more comfortable one. 

Girls come attired in bright kimonos, their hair high 
on their heads and stuck through with big hair-pins 
and tiny paper fans. The boys may brighten their 


Parties and Other Entertainments 155 


costumes by a touch of color in the lapels of their coats 
but many times they prefer to heighten the loveliness 
of the apparel of their playmates by contrast. 

On account of the way they are garbed the girls 
cannot play as active games as usual but the hostess 
may provide delightful amusement for an afternoon 
or evening by having a series of progressive games 
commonly called salmagundi. For this a table is 
provided for every four players but on each table a 
different game is placed: Jackstraws, Tiddledy Winks, 
Pit, Old Maid, picture puzzles and the other old-fash- 
ioned favorites. A time limit is set, and upon a signal 
the two successful players at each table progress, leav- 
ing the losers to play the same game with the next 
couple. When nearly everybody has played nearly 
every game, refreshments are served at the tables. 

A peculiarly appropriate souvenir is a fan which 
to the Japanese is a symbol of life, the rivet represent- 
ing the starting point, and the rays the way a man's 
life expands as he grows older. It should be wrapped 
in white tissue paper and tied with a red ribbon and 
tagged with a tiny red-and-white kite. Such a pack- 
age in the Japan of a few years back meant that it 
was intended for a gift. 

A SHADOW PARTY 

F OR the entertainment feature of a shadow party 
a large sheet is stretched between two rooms, 
or in place of portieres if the house affords such a 


156 Young Folks* Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


place, tacked so as to be tight and smooth and, just 
before the pantomimes begin, made uniformly wet 
with a brush or sponge. The effect will be prettier 
if the sheet is inclosed in a sort of improvised picture 
frame. The room in which the audience is stationed 
is left in darkness, that of the actors is lighted by a 
lamp or lantern placed a few feet back from the sheet. 

The pantomimes offer wide scope for originality. 
The simplest form is to have each small guest in turn 
stand before the sheet while the others guess who he or 
she is. They may disguise themselves by borrowing 
hats or coats, by standing or sitting so as to mislead 
the watchers with regard to their height, or by supple- 
menting their charming little noses with bits of chew- 
ing gum. For this the company may be divided into 
two equal groups which alternately act as audience 
and entertainers. There may be a series of shadows 
representing the characters of Mother Goose or any 
other group of people, real or imaginary. If the 
sheet is large enough a Punch and Judy show or one 
of the nursery stories such as Little Red Riding Hood 
or The Three Bears may be given in pantomime. 

After the shadow pictures are over each guest 
should stand so that his or her profile can be outlined 
against a piece of cardboard. When these silhouettes 
are cut out the players should guess who's who and 
after the contest is over each player should be pre- 
sented with his own shadow picture. 


ONE HUNDRED INDOOR AND 
OUTDOOR GAMES 










ONE HUNDRED INDOOR AND OUTDOOR 
GAMES 


ANIMAL HUNT 

(Active, Outdoor) 


WO pens are marked out some distance apart. 



In one of them stand all of the players except 
the hunter who is stationed between the two inclo- 
sures. Each player bears the name of some animal 
and when the hunter calls his name he must dash to 
the other pen. If he is caught on the way he must 
exchange places with the hunter. This is a game 
that can be enjoyed by a large number of players but 
if there are more than twelve players there should be 
two hunters and there should be several animals of 
each kind, two or three lions, two or three tigers, two 
or three bears, etc. 


ALPHABET 


(Quiet, Indoor) 


E ACH player draws from a box or basket a card- 
board letter, and holding it up before the others 
asks the company to mention some fruit which begins 
with that letter. The player who first names such a 


160 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


fruit gets the letter, and the one who has the largest 
number of letters at the end of the game receives the 
prize. Vegetables, rivers, mountains, generals, presi- 
dents, motion-picture stars, musicians or almost any- 
thing else may be substituted for fruits, and the 
older the children the more difficult should the guess- 
ing be made. 


ANROSCOGGIN 
(Quiet, Indoor) 

A WORD is selected, preferably a long one such 
as incomprehensibility , from which it is said one 
hundred and eighty words may be made by recom- 
bining the letters, or a name such as George Washing- 
ton, Abraham Lincoln, or Robert E. Lee. This is 
written at the top of a sheet of paper, and the object 
of the game is for each contestant, within a certain 
time limit, to make as many new words as possible 
by using only the letters which are found in the main 
word. At the end of the allotted time the one with 
the longest list reads his aloud while the others cross 
out on their lists the words which he calls. The 
winner is of course the one who has the longest list, 
but special honors go to the player who thinks of a 
word which no one else has. 

The game may be played by taking each letter 
separately; for instance, the W in Washington and 
finishing with it before passing on to the next. In 
this case, the player with the longest list again reads 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


161 


out his words while the others mark them out on their 
lists and only the words that are left count. When 
all the lists have been read (those after the first player 
reading only the words which have not been crossed 
out) each contestant adds his failures and then his 
honors, that is, the words which he alone thought of. 
When there is a tie the player whose words are long- 
est receives the prize. 

THE BACHELOR’S KITCHEN 

( f^uiet , Indoor ) 

T HE leader announces to the players who are 
seated around her in a circle that a friend of 
hers who is a bachelor has asked her to furnish his 
kitchen and asks each member in turn what he or she 
will contribute. Each one answers with something 
which can be found in a kitchen but no two may 
present the same thing. 

The leader then begins with the first player and 
asks all sorts of questions to which he must respond 
with the name of his contribution. For instance, if 
he gave an egg-beater the colloquy might run as 
follows : 

With what did you brush your hair this morning? 
An egg-beater. 

And then she may skip around to the other players 
and come back to the first one. 

What did you wash your face in this morning? 

A dish-pan. 


1 62 Young Folks y Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


What did you sweeten your coffee with? 

Baking soda. 

What did you eat your cereal with? 

An egg-beater. 

If a player laughs he has to pay a forfeit or if he 
fails to answer in turn or substitutes another word 
for the name of his contribution to the bachelor's 
kitchen. 

BASTE THE BEAR 

{Active , Outdoor) 

T HE child who is taking the part of the bear has 
a balloon tied to his back. He is given a rag 
a little less than three quarters of a yard long with a 
knot tied in the end or a piece of old rope to defend 
himself against the other players, who, armed with 
similar clubs, try to burst the balloon. 

In another form of the game the bear kneels in a 
circle guarded by a keeper who protects him with a 
club like those described above. His tormentors also 
have clubs with which they “baste the bear" until 
the keeper manages to strike one of them. The boy 
so struck takes the place of the bear. 

BEAN BAGS 
(. Active , Outdoor) 

T HERE are many different ways of having fun 
with bean bags. Some of the games require 
only two bags, others a dozen or more. They should 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


163 


be made (home-made ones are best) of heavy ma- 
terial such as ticking or denim and should be about 
seven by ten inches large when finished. They 
may be filled with beans or peas or grains of corn. 

A favorite game with bean bags is played by hav- 
ing all of the children except one form a line facing 
the odd player who holds two bean bags in his hand. 
The game begins when he pitches one of these to 
the child at the head of the line. This player im- 
mediately returns it while the leader throws the other 
bag to the child standing next to him and the game 
continues thus with rapid action on down the line. 
When a player misses he must take the place of the 
leader and when the leader misses he must go to the 
foot of the line while the player who threw the bag 
which he failed to catch takes his place. The game is 
most successful when there are not more than six or 
eight players. 

There are two popular games in which the bags are 
passed. In one of them the players are divided into 
two equal groups who form two lines facing each 
other. The leader of each one is furnished with 
about a dozen or so bags, each group having bags of a 
different color. At a signal from the umpire the 
leaders begin passing them one at a time. When 
they have all reached the foot of the line the player 
at the foot becomes leader and the bags are passed 
back. There are five commands which must be 
strictly obeyed or the umpire will call a foul. They 
are: 


164 Young Folks ’ Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Pass bags with right hand. 

Pass bags with left hand. 

Pass bags with both hands. 

Pass bags with right hand over left shoulder. 

Pass bags with left hand over right shoulder. 
When only one hand is used the other should be 
placed on the hip. The side which first succeeds in 
passing all of the bags in all five ways wins the game. 

In the other passing game the players sit in two 
lines facing each other, each one grasping the right 
wrist of his neighbor in his left hand. The bags are 
then passed with the free hand, the side that accom- 
plishes this most quickly winning the game. 

In another bean-bag game a mat is placed on the 
lawn to serve as a target, and the players pitch their 
bags toward it like quoits. No throw counts unless 
the bag is completely on the mat. Another way of 
making a target is to suspend a bell in a hoop. The 
players must throw their bags through the hoop 
without ringing the bell. 


BEAST, BIRD, OR FISH 

(Quiet, Indoor) 


X of the players except one are seated. This 



one throws a ball at one of the group and calls, 
“Beast, bird, or fish! — Beast !” and before he has 
counted ten the player who was hit must name a 
beast. If he calls “Bird” or “Fish” the player hit 
must give the name of a bird or a fish. It is not 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


165 


permissible to use the same name twice during the 
course of a game. 

BLIND MAN’S BIFF 
( Active , Outdoor or Indoor) 

T WO players are given boxing gloves and are 
blindfolded as they box. 

BLIND MAN’S BUFF 
( Active y Outdoor or Indoor ) 

A CERTAIN area is marked out beyond which 
the players cannot go and one of their number 
is blindfolded and turned around three times in the 
centre of this district. While he is under this handi- 
cap he must catch one of the other children, they of 
course tantalizing him by coming as close to him as 
they dare. 

In the French form of Blind Man’s Buff the hands 
of the pursuer are tied behind his back and his eyes 
are left un bandaged. 

In the indoor form of the game the blind man 
stands in the centre of a circle of chairs in which the 
other players take their seats after the bandage has 
been placed over his eyes. The blind man gropes 
his way to the edge of the circle where he is allowed 
the privilege of passing his hands once over the face 
and dress of the person whom he first touches and of 


1 66 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


asking one question which must be answered in a stage 
whisper to help him in identifying the player under 
consideration. 

BLIND MAN'S WAND 

( Active , Outdoor) 

T HIS game is also called less euphoniously 
“Grunt.” The players dance singing in a circle 
about one member of the company who is blindfolded 
and armed with a stick or wand. The singing stops 
suddenly and all stand still, letting their hands drop 
at their sides. The blind man extends his wand and 
the person toward whom it points must grasp the loose 
end. The blind man grunts and the other either 
grunts or imitates in a disguised voice the cry of 
some animal. This is repeated three times, the 
cry being varied each time and if the blind man 
guesses correctly the name of the person under ex- 
amination the two exchange places and the game 
begins anew. 


BOOKBINDER 

( Active , Indoor or Outdoor ) 

T HE players form a circle about the leader who 
stands in the centre. Each one has his hands 
extended palms downward and upon them a book. 
The leader passes around the circle catching up the 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 167 


books in turn and trying to strike the hands of the 
holder before he can withdraw them. If the player 
withdraws his hands and lets the book fall it counts 
as if he had received a blow and he has to take the 
place of the leader. 

BULL IN THE RING 

(. Active , Outdoor) 

ALL of the players except one form a circle by 
d grasping each other’s hands firmly, the odd 
player standing in the centre. He is the bull and 
must break through the ring by parting the hands of 
any two of the players. When he has succeeded the 
circle breaks and they all give chase, the one catching 
him becoming the bull for the next game. 

BUZZ 

{Quiety Indoor) 

T HE players sit in a circle about a table and the 
leader begins counting, “One,” the next, “Two” 
and so on up to the seventh player who must say in- 
stead of a numeral, “Buzz” or must whistle or do 
whatever was agreed upon beforehand. The same 
rule applies to every multiple of seven, and the 
player who fails to make the proper response drops 
out of the circle. The next player begins with “One ” 
and the game continues until only one player is left. 


1 68 Young Folks 1 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


The game is quiet only in the sense that the players 
do not have to move around. 

CAT AND RAT 

{Active , Outdoor ) 

T HE players form a circle with the rat on the in- 
side and the cat on the outside. The game 
begins with a brief dialogue between the cat and the 
rat. 

“I am the cat.” 

“I am the rat.” 

“I will catch you!” 

“You can't catch me!” 

The chase begins and the two run in and out of the 
circle, those forming the ring helping the rat by rais- 
ing their arms to let him pass under and obstructing 
the cat by lowering them when she comes along. 
When the rat is caught he joins the circle and the 
cat becomes the rat and calls a new cat from among 
the other players. 

CATCH AND PULL 

( Active , Outdoor ) 

T HIS is rather a rough game but it is great fun. 

A line is drawn through the centre of the play- 
ground and the players range themselves on either 
side. At a signal each player tries to grasp some por- 
tion of the body of an opponent and pull him over 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


169 


the line. Any number may grasp the same player 
and any number may come to his rescue. No one 
is caught until his entire body is over the line, but 
when the enemy has fairly captured him the player 
joins that side and helps pull others over. A time 
limit it set and the side having most players when it 
expires is the winner. 

CHARLIE OVER THE WATER 

C Active , Outdoor) 

C HARLIE stands in the centre of a circle while 
all the other children dance around him chant- 
ing: 

Charlie over the water, 

Charlie over the sea. 

Charlie caught a blackbird, 

Can’t catch me! 

With the last word the players squat, and if Charlie 
succeeds in tagging one of them before he gets in that 
position they exchange places and the game begins 
again. 

CHICKENS FOR SALE 

(Active, Outdoor) 

O NE player is the market man, another is the 
buyer, while the rest, seated in a row with their 
hands clasped under their knees are the chickens. 
The buyer comes up with a genial, “Good morning, 
have you any chickens for sale?” “Yes, a great 


170 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


many. Come look at them,” answers the shop- 
keeper. The buyer examines the chickens finding 
much fault with them, saying, “This one is too lean,” 
“This one hasn’t enough feathers,” “This one is too 
tough,” and so on until he comes to one that seems 
to suit. Any chicken who smiles during the examina- 
tion has to pay a forfeit. The buyer takes the chicken 
which pleases him, and, grasping him by the arms 
while he still has his hands under his knees, swings 
him back and forth three times. If he goes through 
this test without unclasping his hands he is satisfac- 
tory and the buyer carries him home. The game 
continues until all the chickens are sold. 


CIRCLE CATCH BALL 

{Active , Outdoor) 


HE players form a circle around one of their 



«■- number. A basketball or a football is tossed 
across from player to player, the one in the centre 
trying to catch it while it is in midair. When he 
succeeds the player who last threw it takes his place 
in the centre of the circle. 


CLUB FIST 


(fhtiety Indoor) 


OT more than six children can very well play 
-L ^ this game. One child makes a fist and places 
it on on a table around which all of the players are 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


171 


seated. The next child grasps his upright thumb 
and extends his own thumb in turn and this continues 
until every hand except the right hand of the leader 
is similarly placed. The leader then asks the player 
whose hand is on top, 

“What have you there?” (More often it is “What 
have you got there?”) 

“Club Fist.” 

“Which would you rather have me do, knock it 
off, take it off, or have the crow to peck it off?” 

The player takes his choice and the leader follows 
his instructions (having the crow to peck it off means 
that the leader will pinch it gently until the owner 
I removes it) and then addresses the same question to 
the next player until he comes to the last fist. Then 
he says: 

“What have you there?” 

“Bread and cheese.” 

“Where's my share?” 

“The rat got it.” 

“Where's the rat?” 

“The cat's got it.” 

“Where's the cat?” 

“In the woods.” 

“Where's the woods?” 

“The fire burned them.” 

“Where's the fire?” 

“Water quenched it.” 

“Where's the water?” 

“The ox drank it.” 


17 2 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


“Where’s the ox?” 

“The butcher killed it.” 

“Where’s the butcher?” 

“A rope hung him.” 

“Where’s the rope?” 

“A knife cut it.” 

“Where’s the knife?” 

“Buried behind the old church door.” Then turn- 
ing to the other players, “The first one who smiles 
or shows his teeth will get six slaps, six pinches, and 
six hair-pulls.” 

The penalty is inflicted without severity and if 
the players prefer they may substitute something 
else in place of the regular punishment. 


CO-SHEEP 


{Active , Outdoor) 


CIRCLE is marked out on the ground and a 



player is chosen to be It. He begins calling, 
“Co-sheep, co-sheep” while the others follow crying, 
“Ba-a-a-a” until they have gotten some distance 
away from the pen. Then he turns suddenly and 
chases them back to the circle, those he catches on 
the way having to join in the pursuit of the others. 
After the untagged remainder have huddled them- 
selves together in the pen those on the outside try 
to catch them by reaching over and touching them. 
It is not allowable to put either foot inside the pen 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


173 


and the pen should not be large enough to permit 
much dodging about on the part of the sheep. 

COUNTING OUT RHYMES 

/^NLY a few of the commonest of the counting out 
rhymes by which “It” is chosen are given. 

Eeny, meeny, miny, mo 
Catch a nigger by his toe, 

If he hollers, let him go, 

Eeny, meeny, miny, mo. 

Wonery, twoery, tickery, seven; 

Alibi, crackaby, ten, and eleven; 

Pin, pan, muskydan; 

Tweedle-um, twoddle-um, 

Twenty-wan, eerie, ourie, ourie, 

You are out! 

Monkey, monkey, bottle of beer; 

How many monkeys are there here? 

One, two, three, out goes he (she) ! 

Mrs. Mason broke a basin, 

How much will it be? 

Half a pound, 

I’ll put it down, 

Out goes he (she) ! 

DANCE OF THE CUSHION 
(Active > Indoor or Outdoor) 

T HE players join hands and form a circle around 
a cushion. They dance around amiably sev- 
eral times and then some one pulls in such a way 


1 74 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


as to try to make another player touch the cushion. 
When a player touches it he drops out of the ring 
and the game continues until there are only two 
people left, between whom there is a genuine tug of 
war until one or the other overturns the cushion. 

DODGEBALL 
{Active , Outdoor) 

T HE players are divided into two even groups 
one of which forms a large circle about the 
others who stand bunched in the centre. The ob- 
ject of the game is for the circle players to hit each 
one of the inside men with a basket-ball. The centre 
players may dodge, jump, stoop, spring aside, or do 
anything else to avoid the ball except leave the circle; 
but as soon as a player is hit on any part of his body 
he leaves the centre and joins the ring. This con- 
tinues until all of the players have been touched. 
Then the two groups exchange places. 

DO THIS AND DO THAT 
{Quiet, Indoor) 

T HE leader stands in front of the other players 
who are formed into a line and goes through 
various gymnastics, either ordinary physical ex- 
ercises or gestures imitative of some trade or profes- 
sion. When he says, “Do this” the other players 
follow his movements but when he says, “Do that” 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


175 


any one who imitates him must pay a forfeit and any 
player who has paid as many as three forfeits must 
drop out of the game. 

DRAMATIC ADJECTIVES 

{Active, Indoor) 

O NE player leaves the room while the rest agree 
upon an adjective that may easily be acted. 
When the absent player returns he is privileged to 
ask each member of the group one question. In 
answering everyone must act in such a way as to 
suggest the adjective. For instance, if it is merry 
each one will answer with a bright smile; if it is tired 
each one must sigh profoundly and droop dejectedly; 
if it is haughty each one must answer with his nose in 
the air. 

DRAWING 
(Quiet, Indoor ) 

A PIECE of paper is given to an artist (by cour- 
tesy we will call him so); he draws upon it a 
head of any kind of animal, human or otherwise, 
that he fancies, folds the paper over and hands it 
to the next player who, without knowing what the 
first one has drawn, adds to it a body, folds the paper 
over, and passes it to the third player who adds feet 
to the figure. The effect is always funny. 

A piece of paper with an irregular blot on it is 


176 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


handed to each contestant. The object is to draw 
the most effective picture possible incorporating the 


blot. 


Five grains of rice are scattered on a sheet of paper. 
Pencil marks are made to indicate the position of 
each one and then a picture is drawn including them 
all. Instead of placing them at random they may 
be arranged so as to form an outline of a human 
figure, using one for the head, two for the hands, and 
two for the feet. Ten or fifteen grains may be 
used if groups are desired. 


DROP THE HANDKERCHIEF 

( Active , Outdoor) 



TL of the players except one stand in a circle 


with their hands at their sides. The odd player 
walks, runs, or skips around the ring with a hand- 
kerchief in his hand. This he drops behind the 
player who seems to be least expecting it and con- 
tinues around the circle while the one behind whom 
the handkerchief was dropped gives chase. If the 
first player succeeds in getting back to the vacant 
place without being tagged he is safe and the circle 
remains intact but if he is touched with the handker- 
chief he has to go into the centre of the circle which 
is called the “mush pot.” From this he can escape 
only by stealing the handkerchief from behind some 
player or through some soft-hearted runner's throw- 
ing it to him and taking his place. If a player calls 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


177 


the attention of another to the fact that the handker- 
chief is behind him he has to go into the mush-pot. 

DUCK ON A ROCK 
( Active , Outdoor) 

A LARGE stone is chosen for the rock — a heavy- 
box will do — and each boy provides himself 
with a stone as large as he can handle easily. A 
bean-bag may be used if the game is played in- 
doors. These are the “ducks.” Seven or eight 
yards from the rock is drawn a line back of which is 
“Home.” 

The game begins by each boy throwing his stone 
toward the big rock, the one missing it farthest be- 
coming the guard. He must place his stone on the 
rock as a target for the others and stand near it while 
they throw their stones in an effort to knock it off. 
After each throw the player must recover his stone 
and rush back home with it without being tagged by 
the guard. He may choose his own time for running 
and he is safe when he is standing with his foot on his 
duck in the place where it first fell; but after he has 
once picked it up and started for home he may not 
put it down again. Any player who is tagged must 
exchange places with the guard. He cannot tag, 
however, except when his own duck is on the rock, 
and if it is dislodged he must replace it before he gives 
chase. After the guard has tagged a player he should 
recover his duck and get home as quickly as possible 


178 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


for the new guard, as soon as he has placed his stone 
on the rock, can begin tagging. 

THE FARMER IS COMING 

( Active , Outdoor) 

T HE player who is the farmer takes his seat in 
a certain area known as the farmer's orchard. 
The other players, at the invitation of their leader 
to go to the farmer’s for some apples, begin to invade 
his territory and surround him on all sides. All at 
once he claps his hands and the players stand still 
until the leader cries, “The farmer is coming.” 
Then they all scamper back toward home with the 
farmer in hot pursuit. Any player who is caught 
has to exchange places with him, and if several are 
caught the first one becomes the farmer for the next 
game. 

FIRE! FIRE! 

(Quiet, Indoor) 

T HE players are divided into two companies 
under the leadership of captains and are seated 
in two rows so that they face each other. One of the 
captains begins the game by throwing a rubber ball 
to one of the players on the opposite side, calling at 
the same time, “Earth,” “Air,” “Fire,” or “Water.” 
The person toward whom it is thrown must catch it 
and name promptly some animal which lives in the 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


179 


element called, a fish for “Water,” a bird for “Air,” 
an animal for “Earth” — but when “Fire” is called 
no answer should be made. The player who replies 
correctly throws the ball to the person on the op- 
posite side who seems to be least expecting it; but 
the player who fails to catch the ball or to answer 
immediately, or who speaks when it is someone else’s 
turn drops out of the game. The winning side is the 
one that has most players at the close of the contest. 


FLY, FEATHER 
{Active , Indoor) 



HE players stand in a close circle, each one 


provided with a small fan. A short-stemmed 
downy feather is thrown into the air as high above 
their heads as it will go, and each player tries by 
fanning it to keep it from touching him. Any child 
who fans it outside the ring or allows it to touch his 
person or fall to the floor must pay a forfeit. 


FOLLOW THE LEADER 

(. Active , Indoor or Outdoor) 


T HERE is great fun in this game if a lively and 
clever leader is chosen. The players fall in 
line single file and do exactly what the leader does, 
jumping when he jumps, walking backward when he 
walks backward, hopping when he hops, skipping 


180 Young Folks ’ Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


when he skips and whirling around when he whirls 
around. Any player failing to do so must pay a for- 
feit or fall to the foot of the line. 

FORFEITS 
(Quiet, Indoor) 

T HERE are many games which require the pay- 
ment of forfeits but there is only one time- 
honored formula for redeeming them. One person 
— it is often better to have this an older person who is 
quick-witted and ingenious — is seated so that the 
forfeits can be held over her head in such a way that 
she cannot see them. Another player takes up the 
articles one at a time and says: 

“Heavy, heavy hangs over your head.” 

“Fine or superfine?” (“Fine” for boys, “super- 
fine” for girls.) 

“Fine. What shall the owner do to redeem it?” 
And then the penalty is imposed. 

FOX 

(Active, Outdoor) 

/ T'HE children form a ring (they do not clasp 
hands) leaving one of their number on the out- 
side to act as the fox. He slaps a player lightly on 
the shoulder and both race madly around the ring 
going in opposite directions. The one who first 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


1 8 1 


reaches the vacant place holds it while the other must 
be the “fox.” This is also called slap-jack. 


FOX AND GEESE 
(Active, Outdoor) 


WO bases are marked off about twenty yards 



apart, one representing the home of the fox, the 
other that of the geese. The game begins with the 
following bit of dialogue, the fox speaking first. 

“ Goosey, goosey, gander! ” 

“ Fox, salamander! ” 

“ How many geese have you to-day? ” 

“More than you can catch and carry away.” 
Upon this the geese begin running in the direction 
of the fox’s den while he runs out to meet them. If 
he succeeds in catching one of them that player has 
to become the fox but if they all reach his den safely 
he must try again. 


FOX AND HEN 
(Active, Outdoor) 


T HIS game is played with slight variations under 
many different names, Ribbon’s End, Wolf and 
Shepherdess, Chick-a-my, Chick-a-my, Crany Crow, 
and in Japan, Catching the Tail. 

In Ribbon’s End all of the players except the 
catcher place themselves in a row one behind the 
other, each player clasping his arms around the waist 


1 82 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


of the one in front of him. The object of the catcher 
is to touch the person at the end of the line or 
“ribbon” while the line tries by twisting and turning 
without breaking the chain to prevent this. When 
the catcher is successful he takes his place just behind 
the leader of the line while the person caught becomes 
catcher in his stead. 

In Fox and Hen the catcher is the fox; the leader 
of the line, the hen, and the rest of the players the 
chickens. The fox hides himself in his den until the 
hen approaches with her brood and asks what time it 
is. If he answers six, seven, or eight o'clock no harm 
is feared but if he says, “Twelve o'clock — at night” 
the chickens are on the alert for that is the hour at 
which he comes to catch them. The fox cannot 
touch the hen but he may catch any one of the chick- 
ens that he finds within reach. The game continues 
until all are in the hands of the fox and then the one 
first caught becomes fox and the game begins anew. 

In Chick-a-my, Chick-a-my, Crany Crow, the 
catcher is a witch while the leader is Chick-a-my, 
Chick-a-my, Crany Crow herself. The players 
chant: 

Chick-a-my, Chick-a-my, Crany Crow, 

Went to the well to wash her toe. 

When she came back her black-eyed chicken was gone. 

What time is it, old witch? 

“One o'clock.” 

“What time are you going to catch chickens ?” 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 183 


“Six o'clock.” 

The chant is repeated until the appointed hour 
comes and then the game proceeds as in the case of 
the others. 

FROG IN THE MILL-POND 

{Active , Outdoor) 

/^\NE player seats himself tailor fashion in the 
centre of a circle while the others dance forward 
and back around him chanting: 

Frog in the mill-pond. 

Frog in the sea. 

Frog in the mill-pond, 

Can’t catch me. 

The object of the game is for the frog without rising 
from his sitting posture to tag one of the players as 
they dance toward him. When he succeeds they ex- 
change places and the game begins anew. 

FRUIT BASKET 
C Active , Indoors) 

T HE players are seated in a circle around a room 
(it is best to have the room almost bare of fur- 
niture) each one bearing the name of some fruit. 
The leader stands in the centre of the circle and says, 
“I should like an apple, a pear, a peach, a quince, and 


184 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


an orange.” At his last word the players bearing 
the names he has called exchange places and he tries 
to get a seat. The one left standing after the scram- 
ble takes the place of the leader. When he says, “I 
should like a — fruit basket!” all the players rise and 
rush for seats other than their own while the leader 
tries to make someone else the odd player. 

THE GAME OF FLOWERS 

(. Active , Indoor) 

T HIS is a pretty variation of London Bridge. 

Two children join hands and form an arch under 
which the others pass while they all sing: 

We’re looking for a pansy, 

A pansy, a pansy; 

We’re looking for a pansy. 

We’ve found one here. 

Down come the arms and imprison the child who is 
passing under. The leaders who have such names as 
“Meadow” or “Lawn” whisper to their small cap- 
tive: “Where would you rather grow, in a meadow 
or on a lawn?” From this point there are two possi- 
ble conclusions for the game. The flower chooses 
and takes its place behind the leader bearing that 
name. This continues until all of the flowers have 
been caught and then follows a tug of war to decide 
which side is victor. This is somewhat rough for 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 185 


very small children and the pansy may when caught 
simply take the place of the leader whom she chooses 
in which case the game goes on until all of the players 
have been caught. All kinds of flowers may be 
called for — buttercups, daisies, daffodils, poppies, 
violets > and dahlias. 

A GEOGRAPHY GAME 
(Quiet, Indoor) 

Z^NE player takes a ball or a knotted handkerchief 
and throws it to another calling at the same 
time the name of some country, and the person to 
whom the ball was thrown has to name, while the 
timekeeper counts ten very rapidly, some city, town, 
or river in that country or some person or thing con- 
nected with it. If the player succeeds he throws the 
ball to someone else and asks the next question. A 
forfeit is the penalty for an incorrect answer. 

GOING THROUGH THE BRIER PATCH 

(Quiet, Indoor) 

T HE players sit opposite each other on chairs 
several feet apart and form an entanglement of 
their feet. The child who is to go through the brier 
patch is blindfolded and placed at the head of the 
line. Then each child puts his feet down and the 
little blindfolded player goes jumping and stepping 


1 86 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


high down the line to avoid feet which are no longer 
there. 

GOING TO JERUSALEM 

{Active , Indoor) 

A NUMBER of chairs (one less than there are chil- 
dren) are placed in a line in the centre of the room. 
Someone plays a lively march and the children troop 
around them until the music stops. Then each one 
rushes to a seat and the odd player drops out tak- 
ing a chair with him. This continues until no chairs 
are left. 

GOOD MORNING 
{Quiet, Indoor or Outdoor) 

T HIS is a good game to cultivate the sense of 
hearing. One child stands against the wall or 
a tree blindfolded or with his hands over his eyes 
while the others in turn come up and say, “Good 
morning, John” (or Jack or Jim as the case may be). 
He answers, “Good morning, Sam.” This continues 
until he fails to recognize one of the children and then 
the two exchange places. 

GOSSIP 

{Quiet, Indoor) 

T HE players sit in a row and the leader whispers 
a sentence to the child sitting next to him. 
He must immediately pass it on to his neighbor who, 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


187 


without pausing to think, must pass it to the next. 
This goes on until the end of the line is reached, 
and then the sentence as the last player understood 
it is compared with the one which started out. 

GUESSING GAME 
(Quiet, Indoor) 

ANYTHING from the animal, mineral, or vege- 
table kingdoms may be chosen for the object 
to be guessed. The leader stands before the group 
and makes a remark about the thing chosen. For 
instance, “I am thinking of something in the animal 
kingdom which is very useful. What is it?” The 
other children may immediately begin guessing or 
they may ask questions until a clue is discovered 
which will disclose the particular useful member of 
the animal kingdom which the leader has in mind. 

HA! HA! 

(Active, Outdoor) 

T HE players dance in a circle around one of their 
number, who is blindfolded, until he taps on the 
ground with a wand which he carries in his hand. 
As soon as the players have stopped he points toward 
one of them. This player has to take hold of the 
loose end of the wand, and when the blind man says 
“Ha! Ha!” has to respond with, “Ha! Ha!” The 
blind man is given three chances to guess the identity 


1 88 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


of the child at the other end of the wand, and if he is 
successful they exchange places; if not, the game con- 
tinues as before. 


HAIL OVER 

(Active, Outdoor ) 

T HE players are divided into two equal groups 
which place themselves on opposite sides of a 
small house or barn. One player has a rubber ball 
which he pitches over the roof crying at the same 
time, “Hail over!” As soon as one of the players on 
that side has caught the ball he gives a shout and 
they all rush around to the other side of the house, 
those who were on that side running at the same time 
to the other. The player with the ball tags as many 
as possible and all whom he touches have to join his 
group. The fun of the game lies in the fact that 
neither side ever knows in which direction the other 
is coming, and that none on the opposing force knows 
which player has the ball. 

HERE I BAKE, HERE I BREW 

(Active, Outdoor) 

T HE players clasp hands firmly and form a circle 
around one of their number who is the captive 
pining for freedom. He touches one pair of hands and 
says, “Here I bake,” walks over and touches another, 
and says, “Here I brew,” and then rushes toward the 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


189 


place which seems most likely to give way and cries, 
“Here I mean to break through,” and tries to force 
his way out. 

HIDE AND SEEK 
(. Active , Outdoor) 

/ T'HE player who is to be It is chosen by one of 
the counting-out rhymes and stationed on the 
home base. He hides his head and counts, “Ten, 
ten, double ten, forty-five, fifteen” ten times and 
then calls, “All hid?” If he receives no answer he 
takes it for granted that they are and begins the 
search. When he catches sight of a player he calls, 

“I spy ” and there is a mad scramble to see 

which one can reach the base first. Each player 
tries to run home while the one who is It is off looking 
for someone else. The first player caught becomes 
It for the next game. 

HOP OVER 

( Active , Indoors) 

T HOSE taking part in the game stand in a circle 
about two feet apart except for the leader who 
is stationed in the centre holding a stout cord at the 
other end of which is tied a small book securely 
wrapped in heavy paper. He begins whirling the book 
around on the floor and as it comes nearer and nearer 
the other players they must jump over it. 


190 Young Folks' ' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


HOT AND COLD 

{Active , Indoor) 


SMALL object is concealed in a room while 



the player who is to hunt it is absent. When he 
returns to begin the search the other players guide 
him by saying, “Hot” when he is near the object and 
“Cold” when he is far away. A prettier way is to 
have someone playing on the piano, soft music when 
he is far away, louder when he draws nearer, and 
ending in a tremendous crash when he reaches the 
right spot. 


HOT COCKLES 
( Active , Indoor) 


T HIS was a favorite game in the old, old days at 
Christmas time. One of the players kneels 
down, concealing his face in the lap of another and 
places one hand on his back, palm outward. The 
others in turn advance and slap the upturned palm. 
The one kneeling tries to guess from whom he re- 
ceived the blow and when he is successful that person 
takes his place. 

HUNT THE WHISTLE 

C Active , Indoor or Outdoor) 

OOMEONE who is unfamiliar with the game is 
^ placed in the centre of a circle blindfolded. 
Without his knowing it a whistle is tied to his back 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


191 


and then he is told to hunt the whistle. The other 
players slip behind him and blow it until he finally 
discovers the trick. 


IT 

(Quiet, Indoor) 

/^\NE child leaves the room while the others agree 
upon some object which he must guess by ask- 
ing questions of the assembled group. These ques- 
tions should be put so that they can be answered by 
“Yes,” “No,” or “I don’t know.” The object may 
be anything but if the child who was sent out of the 
room has never played the game before there is great 
mystification if each member of the group decides 
that his right-hand neighbor is It. 


JACK FROST 
(Active, Indoor or Outdoor) 

T HE children stand in a ring, arm’s length apart, 
with one of their number left outside to repre- 
sent Jack Frost. He touches one of the children on 
the right hand and while he dances around the ring 
this child, shaking his hand, says to the one standing 
at his left, “Jack Frost came this way.” 

“What did he do?” 

“He nipped my right hand — 0-0-h!” And he 
shakes his hand with greater violence. By this time 


192 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Jack Frost has had time to go around the circle and 
get back in time to nip the right hand of the second 
player who turns to the third, and shaking his hand 
announces: 

“Jack Frost came this way.” When the player 
asks what he did, he responds, “He nipped my right 
hand, 0-0-h!” and he too begins shaking his right 
hand with renewed vigor. This continues until all 
the right hands have been nipped and then the left 
hands, then the right feet, then the left feet, and 
then the heads. No child can stop shaking any one 
of the nipped members until the game is over. 


JACK IN THE BUSH 

(Quiet, Indoor) 

'TTIIS game is at its best when there are only two 
players each one provided with a number of 
small hard berries or beans. The first player selects 
however many he pleases and holding out the closed 
hand which contains them, says: 

“Jack in the bush.” 

“Til cut him down.” 

“How many licks?” 

And the other player has to guess the number 
of berries in the hand. If he guesses correctly 
he gets them but if he guesses wrongly he has 
to give the other as many berries as it takes to 
make the number that he guessed. Of course 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


193 


the one who first loses all his berries loses the 
game. 

JACOB AND RACHAEL 
C Active , Outdoor) 

r I 'HIS is a good game when there are enough chil- 
dren to form a large circle. All of the players 
clasp hands except a boy (Jacob) and a girl (Rachael), 
who are placed in the centre of the ring. One of 
these who is blindfolded must catch the other. 
Neither can go outside the circle. In order to guide 
him in his task, Jacob, if he happens to be the blind- 
folded one, calls: 

“ Where are you, Rachael?” 

And Rachael must answer, “Here I am, Jacob,” 
every time he calls as she dodges about the circle 
until she is finally caught. Then she is blindfolded, 
calls for another Jacob and the game proceeds as 
before except that the question now is, “Where are 
you, Jacob?” and the answer, “Here I am, Rachael.” 

JAPANESE CRAB RACE 

{Active , Outdoor or Indoor) 

T HIS is also called a Lobster race. It should be 
run either on a grassy plot or in a gynmasium 
or large room. Two lines are marked out some dis- 
tance apart, one to serve as a starting point, the 
other as a goal. The runners place themselves on 
“all fours” on the first line with their backs toward 


194 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


the goal. At a signal from the leader they begin 
racing backward in their crouching position. There 
is as much fun for the watchers as for the runners, 
for, completely bewildered as to the points of the 
compass, the little “ crabs” go backing off in nearly 
every direction except the right one. 

A JINGLING MATCH 

C Active , Outdoor) 

T HE following game is described in “Tom Brown’s 
School Days” and while it was originally intended 
for big boys and young men it may be played by 
children if they are all of about the same size. It 
is not a good game for both big and little people at 
the same time. 

A large roped ring is made, into which are introduced a dozen 
or so of big boys and young men who mean to play; these are 
carefully blinded and turned loose into the ring, and then a man 
is introduced not blindfolded, with a bell hung around his neck 
and his two hands tied behind him. Of course every time he 
moves the bell must ring, as he has no hands to hold it, and so 
the dozen blindfolded men have to catch him. This they can- 
not always manage if he is a lively fellow, but half of them al- 
ways rush into the arms of the other half, or drive their heads 
together, or tumble over, and then the crowd laughs vehemently. 

LAME FOX 
(Active, Outdoor ) 

A T ONE end of the playground a den is marked 
* off for the fox, at the other a yard for the 
chickens. The chickens advance toward the den of 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


195 


the fox, taunting him all the while with his lameness 
and boasting that he will not be able to catch them. 
The fox waits until they are very close to him and 
then, after taking three steps beyond his den, hops 
on one foot as he tries to tag the chickens. The 
fun of the game depends upon the risks the chick- 
ens take by coming as close to him as they dare. 
Any chicken that is tagged becomes a lame fox 
and joins in the pursuit of the others until all are 
caught. If after the first three steps any fox puts 
down both feet at a time (he may change from one 
foot to the other, however) the chickens may drive 
him back to this den whence he has to begin again. 

LEAPFROG 
{Active , Outdoor) 

T HIS is a favorite game with boys. One player 
places his hands just above his knees thus 
“making a back” over which the others vault in turn. 
Each player as he leaps over makes a back and each 
succeeding player has to take all of the backs. 

The regular leaping may be varied by the Torch- 
light, in which each vaulter uses only one hand to 
help him over while he waves his cap in the other; 
Hats Off, in which each player leaves his cap on the 
back (only one player is in the stooping position for 
this), each succeeding player having to clear the 
entire pile; Hats Up, in which each player removes 
his cap from the back without disturbing the others. 


196 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


A long back is made in this way. One player 
stands so that the leader of the line can brace his head 
against him as he bends over. The next player 
clasps his hands around the waist of the player in 
front of him and turns his head to one side, the next 
player following suit until the desired length is ob- 
tained. “Bung the Bucket” is one of the most 
popular games for the long back. For this the 
players are divided into two equal groups, the bungs 
and the buckets. Half of these make a long back. 
These are the buckets. One of the bungs leaps up 
on the back, straddling it as far up as possible, and 
the others vault into position behind him until all are 
seated. If all the of bungs find a place without a 
break occurring in the buckets the game counts for 
the buckets. Otherwise it goes to the bungs. A 
certain score should be agreed upon before the game 
begins and a specified number of points counted off 
for each bung who fails to get a seat. No player 
can move after he is once seated on the back. 


LOST CAP 
( Active , Outdoor) 

A LL of the players except one stand in a circle, 
L each armed with a stick something less than 
a yard long. The odd player stands in the centre 
with an old cap in his hand which he tosses toward 
the others. They catch it on their sticks and keep it 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


197 


out of the reach of its owner. When he succeeds in 
getting it he takes the place of the player from whom 
he took it, that player becoming the centre man. 
The sticks must be held upright and if the cap is 
dropped to the ground it must be picked up by hand. 

MASTER OF THE RING 

C derive , Outdoor) 

T HE players stand with their arms folded across 
their chests or behind their backs inside a circle 
which has been marked on the ground. Upon a 
signal each player begins trying to push his neighbor 
out of the circle with his shoulders. A player who 
steps across the line, or who falls or unclasps his arms 
drops out of the game. The last one left in the circle 
is the Master of the Ring. 

THE MISSING RING 

(Quiet, Indoor) 

T HE ring is slipped on to a piece of stout twine 
which is held in the hands of the players who 
are standing in a circle around one member of the 
group. The person in the centre must try to detect 
and seize the hand which holds the ring and the 
players make every sort of feint of passing it to mis- 
lead him. The ring must constantly be passing from 
hand to hand and when the centre player is successful 


198 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


in locating it the person in whose hands it was found 
must take his place. 

MUSICAL CONTEST 
{ffuiet> Indoor) 

S OME ONE sits at the piano and plays over 
snatches of tunes that are familiar to the children 
who are gathered around. Each child is furnished 
with a pencil and a sheet of paper on which he writes 
down the airs as they are played, the one guessing 
successfully the greatest number receiving a small 
prize. This is an excellent amusement for an indoor 
party. The tunes may be popular melodies or they 
may be the songs of long, long ago, or a mixture of 
both. 

MUSICAL NEIGHBORS 

C Active , Indoor) 

H ALF the company is blindfolded and seated in 
a circle with an empty chair at the right of each 
player. The rest of the group stand perfectly silent in 
the centre of the room until some one at the piano 
begins to play a familiar air. Then they creep softly 
into the vacant chairs and begin to sing in disguised 
voices. The blindfolded members listen intently to 
discover who their musical neighbors are. The 
music stops abruptly and at the leader's command 
the blind folk begin to guess the names of their right- 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


199 


hand neighbors. Those who are successful transfer 
their bandages to the neighbors in question and the 
game begins again. 

NOAH’S ARK 
(Quiet, Indoor) 

A FULL length mirror is concealed behind a cur- 
tain in another room. The players are taken 
into the Ark one at a time. “Noah” asks each one 
what kind of animal he would like to see, and, upon 
receiving the answer, draws aside the curtain and 
shows the player his own image. The children 
usually ask to see monkeys, kangaroos, giraffes, etc. 

PANJANDRUM 
(Active, Outdoor) 

A place is marked out on the playground to serve 
as the home of the great Panjandrum and two 
players are chosen to act as his body guard, the 
others being scattered about over the playground. 
The Panjandrum sallies forth with the two children 
who constitute the body guard walking just in front 
of him with their hands clasped so as to protect him 
against the other players, who try to tag him with- 
out being tagged by the guard. The Panjandrum 
may move around his guards as much as he likes but 
when he is tagged by a player he and his guards re- 
turn home and the Panjandrum and the player who 


200 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


tagged him exchange places and the game proceeds 
as before. 

THE PARISH PRIEST 

( Active , Indoor) 

T HIS game is also known as the Prince of Paris. 

There is great fun in it after the children have 
once got started to playing. A leader is chosen and 
all the other players are given the names of animals 
and seated in a long line. The leader (it is a good 
plan for him to have the names of the animals written 
down for ready reference) stands in front and says: 
“The Parish Priest has lost his hat and the dog has it.” 
The animal by that name cries indignantly: 

“I, sir?” 

“Yes, you, sir.” 

“Not I, sir.” 

“Who then, sir?” 

“The cat, sir.” 

The cat takes it up at once. 

“I, sir?” 

“Yes, you, sir.” 

“Not I, sir.” 

“Who then, sir?” 

“The elephant, sir.” 

The elephant responds immediately: 

“I, sir,” and passes it on to another player in the 
same way. 

There is no regular sequence in the order in which 
the names of the animals are called and a player at 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


201 


the head of the line may accuse one near the end of it 
with having the missing hat. If a player makes the 
slightest mistake such as putting in “Sir” where it 
does not belong or leaving it out, or if he hesitates for 
even the fraction of a second he has to go to the foot 
of the line. This means that there is constant 
shuffling of the players, for every time one has to go 
to the root the others must move up to make room. 
When any one of the players makes a mistake he be- 
gins again with, “The Parish Priest has lost his hat 

and the has it.” The game is hard to beat when 

it is in the hands of a skilful leader. 


PASSING THE CLUB 
(Active, Indoor) 


HIS is a game for boys. Two lines are formed 



A and the leaders begin simultaneously to pass 
the club to the next player. This may be done in 
various ways — through the legs with the right hand, 
through the legs with the left hand, over the right 
shoulder, over the left shoulder, etc. The player at 
the foot of the line runs to the head as soon as he 
receives the club and starts it down again. 


PI 


(Quiet, Indoor) 


T HE letters of a sentence or word are interchanged 
and transposed so as to destroy the original 
meaning. The object of the game is to straighten 


202 Young Folks ’ Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


these out. “Slal ellw atth sned llew” is not at first 
glance recognized as “All’s well that ends well ’ nor 
Nnllcoi as Lincoln. The names of famous women, 
of flowers, birds, trees, and many other things may be 
used. Two suggestive groups are given below. 

FAMOUS AMERICAN ANIMAL CONTORTIONS 
MEN 


cillonn 

Lincoln 

gip 

Pig 

ghanowtisn 

Washington 

ate 

cat 

eel 

Lee 

tar 

rat 

reefjofns 

Jefferson 

rabe 

bear 

bestwer 

Webster 

woe 

cow 

loonegfwll 

Longfellow 

gdo 

dog 

riitthew 

Whittier 

soreh 

horse 

rainel 

Lanier 

inlo 

lion 

kinlarnf 

Franklin 

kanse 

snake 

ginriv 

Irving 

mabl 

lamb 

leerovost 

Roosevelt 

traibb 

rabbit 

lwisno 

Wilson 

fowl 

wolf 


POISON CIRCLE 

( Active , Outdoor) 

T HE poison circle is marked out on the ground 
within the circle formed by the players clasping 
hands. Each player tries to pull the others into the 
poison circle and to stay out himself. When a player 
touches the poison area the others unclasp hands and 
run to touch wood or iron, if that is more con- 
venient, for safety and a regular game of tag follows 
until one of the players is tagged. Then they all 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


20 3 


form a ring around the poison circle and the game 
begins again. 

POM POM PULLAWAY 

(Active, Outdoor) 

T WO bases are marked off about forty feet apart. 

All of the players except the one who is It stand 
on one of the bases while the odd player stands about 
half way between the two lines. He calls to any 
player that he chooses: 

“ Pom Pom Pull away 

Come away or I’ll fetch you away.” 

The player called must run across the open space 
that lies between him and the other line. If he 
reaches his goal without being tagged he stays there 
until all of the children have joined him or have been 
caught trying to do so. As soon as a player is caught 
he helps in catching the others, and when all are 
caught the first one becomes It for the next game. 
When all of the players have made the attempt to 
get to the other line those who are still uncaught re- 
verse the order and try to get back to their first goal. 

POOR PUSSY 
(Quiet, Indoor) 

T HE player who is Poor Pussy kneels in front of 
another and says dolefully, “Me-e-o-o-w.” 
That player as she strokes pussy's head must say, 


204 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


“Poor Pussy" in most commiserating tones. This 
is repeated three times; if either smiles during the 
process he or she has to pay a forfeit. 

PRISONER'S BASE 
(Active , Outdoor) 

T HE players are di- 
vided into two equal 
companies under the lead- 
ership of captains. Two 
bases are marked out 
some distance from each 
other and back of each a 
small inclosure called the 
“prison." 

The game Degins when 
one player sallies forth 
and goes as near as he 
dares to the lines of the 
enemy. A member of the 
opposing party starts in 
pursuit and then another 
player from the same 
side as the first player 
rushes out to try to catch 
the second venturer. A 
player can only capture some one who left home 
before he did and can only be captured by some one 
who left after he did. When a player is captured he 



Prisoner's Base 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


205 


is carried to prison and his jailor is immune from 
capture until after he has been home and has started 
out again. It is a thrilling moment in the game when 
a member of his own group runs the gauntlet to re- 
lease the prisoner. Once he is touched both may 
walk safely back to their own lines. The game con- 
tinues until all of one side or the other are in prison. 

PUSS IN THE CORNER 

( Active , Outdoor) 

E ACH player except the one who is to be Puss is 
stationed on a corner. The corners may be 
trees, rocks, or almost anything else but there must 
be one less than there are players. Puss goes from 
one to another saying, “Puss wants a corner.” Each 
player answers, “Go to the next-door neighbor” and 
as soon as Puss's back is turned exchanges places 
with some other player. Puss meanwhile.trying to get 
one of the corners left vacant. The game is very 
lively when the players are willing to take chances on 
getting caught. 


SAIL A BOAT 

{Active , Outdoor) 

T WO children stand with their hands clasped and 
their feet braced together and whirl rapidly 
around for several minutes. Their gait when the 


2o6 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


“sailboat” comes to a stop suggests that of actual 
sailors at sea during very rough weather. 


SIMON SAYS 


] uiet , Indoor ) 


HE players are seated around a table each one 



A with his fists, with the thumbs up, resting near 
the edge of the board. The leader begins the game 
by saying, “Simon says, ‘Thumbs down’.” Where- 
upon each player must turn his hands so that the 
tips of his thumbs touch the table. “Simon says 
‘Thumbs up’” means to reverse the order; “Simon 
says ‘Wig wag’” to move the thumbs back and forth. 
No player should move his hands unless Simon says 
for him to do so and the leader will try to catch the 
other players off guard by saying simply, “Thumbs 
up,” “Thumbs down,” or, “Wig wag.” Any one 
who moves without the authority of Simon pays a 
forfeit. 


SHAKERS 
{Active , Outdoor) 


^TTIIS is an excellent game for a large party but 
it may be played by a small group with great 
enjoyment. The whole company joins hands and 
forms a ring, then lets the hands fall at the sides and 
begins singing with appropriate gestures: 

“I put my right hand in,” {toward the centre of the 
circle ). 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


207 


“I put my right hand out,” ( body turned half 
around , hand thrust out.) 

“I give my right hand a shake, shake, shake,” 
( shaking the hand violently). 

“And I turn my body about,” ( whirls around and 
faces centre of circle .) 

The song and action are repeated with, CC I put my left 
hand in, I put my right foot in, I put my left foot in, 
I put my noodle (head) in, and I put my whole self in.” 

SHOUTING PROVERBS 

(Quiet, Indoor) 

S HOUTING PROVERBS is quiet only in the sense 
that the children do not have to move around 
while playing it. One of the players is sent from 
the room while the others agree upon a proverb. 
The leader gives a word of it to each player and then 
calls in the absent one. Upon his return the leader 
signals the others to shout in unison the words which 
have been given them, and he is to guess from this 
what the proverb is, a task which is not so easy as it 
sounds. The words may be whispered, sung, shouted, 
or spoken in an ordinary tone of voice. 

SLING THE MONKEY 

(Active, Outdoor) 

A BOY is suspended by a heavy band tied about 
his waist and is given a piece of white chalk. 
His companions thrash him with clubs (rags about 


ao8 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


three quarters of a yard long with knots in the end) 
until he succeeds in marking one of them with the 
chalk. The marked player then takes his place. 
This game has long been a favorite with sailors. 


SPOONS 
(Quiet, Indoor) 

T HE players, except one, are seated in a circle. 

The odd player is blindfolded and given a pair 
of tablespoons, if wooden ones are not available. 
By passing these over the head and face of one of the 
players seated in the circle he tries to identify him. 
If he is correct in his guess they exchange places; if 
not, he passes on to another player. 


SPUD 

(Active, Outdoor) 

T HE children (and this is a game for older ones) 
stand close together in a group, the one in the 
centre holding a soft ball or bean bag. He drops the 
ball and calls the name of one of the players. This 
one dashes up and seizes the ball while the others run 
off in every direction. As soon as he has secured the 
ball he tries to hit one of them from where he stands. 
If he misses he has to get the ball and try again, but 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


209 


if he succeeds the player whom he struck catches up 
the ball and tries to hit some one else; this one in 
turn does the same thing, and the game continues 
until one of the players has three “ spuds” against 
him. This means that three times he has failed in 
his attempt to hit one of the others. He is punished 
by being made to stand about twenty feet away from 
the rest of the group with his back toward them while 
they pelt him with balls or bean bags. 


STATUE 
(. Active y Indoor) 

O NE player takes each of the others in turn by the 
hands and swings her (it is a very pretty game 
for girls) around once and then lets go, the player 
who was swung having to remain in whatever position 
she happened to be when she regained her equili- 
brium. This she must hold until all of the others 
have been made into statues. The first one to move 
perceptibly has to swing the children during the next 
game. 


STILL POND 

{Active > Outdoor) 

T HE children gather close around their leader who 
is blindfolded. While he counts ten rapidly 
they run as far as they can and then stand still while 


2io Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


he gropes around trying to catch them. Each one 
is allowed three steps to avoid being caught. Both 
feet have to be moved for it to count as a step. 


TAG 

C Active , Outdoor) 

T HIS is perhaps the oldest and most popular of 
the games that children play. In its earliest 
form the player who is called It represented an evil 
spirit against whose malevolent designs protection 
could be secured by touching iron. This was called 
Iron Tag. The commonest form of the game to-day 
is Wood Tag in which the runners are safe when they 
are touching wood. In Shadow Tag the player is 
safe when he in standing on a shadow. In Squat Tag 
he is safe while he is in that ungraceful position. 
The number of squats to which a player is entitled is 
limited. Japanese Tag is much like the other forms 
of the game except that the player has to keep his 
hand on the part of his body that was tagged until 
the game is over. In Cross Tag if a player passes 
between It and the person whom he is chasing he 
must abandon the first player and run after the 
second. Whip Tag is like Drop the Handkerchief 
except that in place of a handkerchief the player is 
armed with a rag with a knot tied in one end with 
which he beats the runner around the circle. In all 
forms of the game a player who has been tagged 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


21 1 


joins in to help tag the others until all have been 
caught. 


TARGET FLIP 

t 

{Quiet, Indoor) 

O N A flat board or on the top of the kitchen table 
a target is laid out consisting of five circles, one 
within the other, the largest about the size of a dinner 
plate. The smallest is marked ioo, the next 50, 
the next 25, then 10, and last 5. Each player has 
six ordinary beans which he flips with a snap of his 
thumb and finger toward the centre of the target. 
Ten turns for each player constitutes a game. If a 
bean is on the line it counts for the circle of least 
value. The largest count of any one player wins the 
prize. Any number of persons may engage in the 
game. 


TEN STEPS 
{Active, Outdoor) 

A GOAL is marked some distance away from the 
spot which is to serve as base. The player 
who is to be It stands on the base with the others 
in a row on a line about two feet from him. He turns 
his back and counts ten while the rest of the players 
go as far away as they can by taking long steps. 
When he reaches ten the child who is counting whirls 
around and calls back to the base any player whom 


2i2 Young Folks’ Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


he sees moving. Then he counts ten again while the 
players again get as far away as they can. This is 
repeated until all have reached the goal. As soon as 
a player has finished he may come back and sit in 
the shade until the others have reached the goal. If 
the game is played where there are good places for 
hiding the players after they have reached the goal 
may proceed as in Hide and Seek. 

THIMBLE THIMBLE 

{Quiet, Indoor ) 

A LL of the players except one are seated with the 
palms of the hands pressed together. The odd 
player with a thimble concealed in his hands, which 
are in a similar position, passes from one to another 
drawing his hands between theirs. He leaves the 
thimble with one of them and when he has com- 
pleted his round he asks each one in turn, “Who has 
the thimble ?” Those who guess incorrectly have to 
pay forfeits and the holder of the thimble becomes 
leader for the next game. 

THREE DEEP 

( Active , Indoor or Outdoor) 

A LL of the players except two take partners and 
stand so that they form two concentric circles. 
One of the odd players is the hunter, the other the 
quarry. They stand on opposite sides of the circle. 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


21 3 


one outside and one inside, and when at a signal the 
hunter goes in pursuit of the quarry the latter can 
find refuge only by standing beside one of the couples. 
This makes the outside player of that group the 
quarry and he must flee before the hunter. He can 
dash through the circle but he cannot stop except 
when he gives up and stops beside one of the couples, 
thus making the outside number of the little file the 
object of the chase. When the hunter catches his 
prey they exchange places. The hunter becoming 
the quarry, and the quarry becoming the hunter. 

TICK TACK TOO 
( Quiet y Indoor) 

A DIAGRAM is made on a piece of paper, a slate, 
a black board, or the ground, of two vertical 
lines crossed by two [hori- 
zontal lines. One player 
makes naughts, the other 
crosses until every space is 
filled, the object of the game 
being for one player to get 
three noughts or three crosses 
in a row. The row may be 
vertical, horizontal or diago- 
nal. When he has finished 
he says, “Tick, tack, too” 
touching each of his marks 
in the row and the game is checked up to his credit. 


X 


0 


X 

X 

0 

0 

0 


Tick Tack Too 


214 Young Folks 9 Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Many times the game ends in a draw without either 
player scoring. 

TOM TIDDLER’S GROUND 

(Active, Outdoor) 

A CERTAIN area is marked out as Tom Tiddler’s 
ground upon which no one except Tom can 
venture under peril of capture. The players dash 
across the plot and Tom gives chase until he catches 
one of the more daring of the number and puts him 
in his place while he joins the rest of the group. 

TRADE PANTOMIMES 
( Active , Outdoor) 

T HE players are divided into two equal groups 
who stand on two bases some distance apart. 
Sometimes they are called Masters and Men but 
very often the game is played under the name of 
Pretty Girls’ House and takes the following form: 
The group which is to have first trial agrees upon some 
trade or occupation which they can represent in dumb 
show and approaches the base of the other group. 
“Bum, bum, bum.” 

“Where are you from?” 

“Pretty Girls’ House.” 

“What’s your trade?” 

“Lemonade.” 

“Give us a sample”’ 

They go through the motions of their trade while 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


215 


the others try to guess what it is. As soon as they are 
successful the first group makes a wild dash for home 
with the others in swift pursuit. Those who are 
caught have to join the other side which in a few 
minutes agrees upon a trade, and, alternately acting 
as Masters and Men, the players continue the game 
until all on one side have been caught or until a time 
limit has been reached. Gardening, bricklaying, 
various operations connected with farming, teaching, 
public speaking, stenographic work, bicycling, and 
automobiling can all be represented in pantomime. 


TRAVELER'S ABC 


(Quiet, Indoor) 



TIE players sit in a row, and the leader begins 


-*■ by stating that he is going to a place beginning 
with the letter A and asking the one sitting next to 
him what he must carry with him. The player 
answers by suggesting things that begin with the 
letter A and then turns to his next neighbor, states 
that he is going to a place beginning with B and asks 
what he shall carry, and so on through the alphabet. 
For instance: 

I am going to Albany. What shall I carry? 

Apples, apricots, and allspice. I am going to 
Boston. What shall I carry? 

Beans, berries, and boots. I am going to Colum- 
bus. What shall I carry? 


2i 6 Young Folks' Encyclopedia of Etiquette 


Candy, cake, and cocoanuts. I am going to 
Denver. What shall I carry? 

Ducks, dippers, and Democrats. I am going to 
Edinburgh. What shall I carry? 

Eggs, endive, and eye-glasses. I am going to Fred- 
ericksburg. What shall I carry? 

Fish, fowls, and fruit. I am going to Greenwich. 
What shall I carry? 

Greengages, geese, and grass. I am going to 
Halifax. What shall I carry? 

Hay, ham, and hair-pins. I am going to Ireland. 
What shall I carry? 

Ice, ink, and Indian corn. I am going to Killarney. 
What shall I carry? 

A kite, a kimono, and a kangaroo. ‘ I am going to 
London — etc., etc., etc. 

TWIRL THE PLATTER 

(Active , Outdoor) 

npHE leader stands several feet apart from the 
other players with a platter in his hands. As 
he twirls it he calls the name of one of the players who 
must run forward and catch it before it falls. 

UP JENKS 

(Quiet, Indoor) 

U P JENKS or Up Jenkins is an old favorite. 

Six or eight or even twelve players, divided 
into two equal companies, sit around a table. One 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


217 


side has a silver quarter — a dime or a penny will 
do — which is held tightly in the hand of one of the 
players. The hands are held under the table until 
the captain of the opposing side gives the command 
“Up Jenkins,” when they are raised high above the 
heads. When the captain says, “Down Jenkins” 
they are brought down to the table, palms open and 
downward, so as to make as much noise as possible 
and drown the clink of the coin. The captain 
examines the hands in turn and orders each one off 
as he decides that it has not the quarter under it. 
If it is in the hand last ordered off, his side wins, but 
if he guesses wrongly and one of the hands that he 
has ordered off has the coin, that side keeps it again 
and has to its credit all the hands still remaining on 
the table. 


WEATHER COCK 
(Active, Outdoor) 

O NE player stands in front of the others and calls 
out the direction in which the wind is blowing 
and the others turn in that direction. When he says, 
“The wind blows east,” the players turn toward the 
east; when he says, “The wind blows west” the 
players turn to the west; and when he says, “Whirl- 
wind” the players whirl rapidly around three times. 
The directions should be given very quickly and for 
older children the game can be made more compli- 


2i 8 Young Folks' Encyclopaedia of Etiquette 


cated by using the half-way points, northeast, south- 
west etc., as well. 


WHO ARE YOU? 


(Quiet, Indoor ) 


S EACH guest arrives he is ushered into the 



drawing room where he is asked to turn his 
back while his hostess pins upon it a slip of paper 
bearing the name of some famous person such as 
Charlie Chaplin, Buffalo Bill, Mutt, Mother Goose, 
or Mary Pickford. He must guess from the com- 
ments of the others who he is and must wear the slip 
of paper until he is successful. The hostess may add 
to the hilarity of the occasion by the names which 
she chooses for her guests, rememberingaways that 
incongruity is more likely to produce a laugh than 
fitness. 


WINK 

(. Active , Indoor) 


npHERE must be an odd player for Wink. Chairs 
are placed in a circle in which one group 
of the players seat themselves while the other group 
stands on guard back of them. The odd player 
has an empty chair into which he must try to entice 
some one of the seated players by signalling him or 
her with a wink. The player thus invited tries to 
slip out of his chair into the empty one without being 


Indoor and Outdoor Games 


219 


tagged by his guard. The guard cannot keep his 
hand on the player in his chair and he cannot rush 
around to the side to tag him. If the guard is 
caught off duty and his partner gets away he must 
try to get another by winking at some other member 
of the circle; but if the guard touches him before he 
rises he has to keep his seat. 


YEMARI 


EMARI is a Japanese word for “hand-ball” 



but it is not played like the American game of 
that name. The players stand in a circle and one 
of them takes the ball, a light rubber ball about 
two inches in diameter, and begins bouncing it up 
and down on the ground by striking it with the 
open palm every time it rebounds. This he continues 
to do as long as the ball remains where he can reach 
it without moving from his place in the circle; but as 
soon as it moves nearer some other player, that 
player must strike it, and so the game continues. 
A failure to strike the ball causes the player to lose 
his place in the circle and the game proceeds until 
all except one have met this fate. 


the end 


THE COUNTRY LIFE PRESS 
GARDEN CITY, N. Y. 


3477 











































































